It’s not often that we see strong older women characters in film or TV. In May 2015, when Netflix introduced us to Grace and Frankie, portrayed by Jane Fonda and Lily Tomlin, that changed. Through seven seasons, we laughed and cried with these characters. We grew to love them. We felt their pain, applauded their courage, and respected their authenticity, recognizing our own weaknesses and flaws in them. They not only challenged our ageist beliefs about older women, but held up a mirror for all of us to explore how we feel about aging. Grace and Frankie “show themselves, their families, and their fans what it means to live life to the fullest, fearlessly and unapologetically."
On April 29th, the remaining final episodes of Season 7, will be released on Netflix. The end of this highly successful series is cause to not only celebrate Grace and Frankie’s journey of self-discovery and growth, the lessons we’ve learned from their friendship, but also to honor the genius of the women who brought these characters to life, Marta Kauffman, and Okay Goodnight producers, Hannah K.S. Canter and Robbie Rowe Tollin.
Marta Kauffman, co-creator of Friends and Grace and Frankie, had the goal of showing life through the lens of being an older woman and what that means. She wanted the series to be aspirational. Her desire to work with Jane Fonda and Lily Tomlin and create characters she wanted them to portray was her initial inspiration.
Marta and Hannah K.S. Canter, Marta’s daughter and VP of Production at Okay Goodnight, were sitting in the car one day when Hannah came up with the idea of two women who don’t like each other, and their husbands fall in love and get married.
Hannah K.S. Canter: Obviously, I’m not from their same generation, but I’ve seen Jane and Lily’s work and the attitudes that I’ve seen them play. Being an odd couple of sorts just seemed so juicy for the two of them, and so natural because they are really, really close friends with incredible chemistry, but they’re super different. When we met them for the first time to pitch this, they were live in front of us acting out so many of the dynamics that we were hoping. It was like, this is the show.
Robbie Rowe Tollin: One thing we discovered is that the demographic that fell in love with this show was far and wide. Twenty-year-olds all the way up to 80-year-olds. There’s something about these characters that is relatable to all ages. They’re sexy. They still want to date. They want to start businesses. It’s like, why would that need to stop just because you’re an older woman? Honestly, it’s not that different from who they are in real life. They’re dynamic. They’re doers. They started over and keep going more than any two women I think I’ve ever met.
Bonnie Marcus: Frankie is a free spirit, who balances Grace, who is very business oriented and organized. Those dynamics play out perfectly. They were not friends. They really disliked each other and through the traumatic experience with their husbands, they ended up living together and becoming the best of friends despite their personality differences. What is the takeaway? What does this tell us about friendship?
Marta Kauffman: Well, it’s funny. I have a couple of things. A lot of people say it’s harder to make friends as you get older. It gets more challenging because people have busy lives. The thing about Grace and Frankie is they had this common experience, and that is what drew them together. However, I think the more important piece of it is the joy of female friendships and the way they are there for each other, the way they talk to each other, the way they support each other, the way they call each other on their s**t.
Marcus: With the series coming to a close, what have you learned from your characters?
Kauffman: I think I learned from Grace that you can change at any age and that just because you’ve been something for a long time doesn’t mean you have to continue being that. From Frankie I learned something about joy, her ability to embrace everything that she committed to wholeheartedly.
Tollin: The end of Season 7, which you haven’t seen yet, talks about what do you make of what you’ve done in your life at this age or any age, but particularly as an older woman? What’s enough? What makes me whole? I found that really resonated with me in terms of reflecting back on what you’ve done and want you want to do going forward and that the doors are open. They’re not slammed not matter what age you are.
Canter: I think what they taught me was to not fear the second half of my life. I think we have this image of an arc and we hit some peak and then we slide down into this sad, dark place where we’re less vital. We’re less interesting. We’re having less fun.
Marcus: What are your personal feelings about saying goodbye to these characters?
Kauffman: It’s very bittersweet. I love those characters. I love writing them. I am going to miss them terribly. I’m going to miss Jane and Lily and the rest of the cast and crew. Shows have a lifespan. I think this was the right time to get out before we overstayed our welcome. Although that doesn’t make me happy, at least I feel like we did it on the right terms.
Tollin: So lucky to be able to make as many seasons of this show. We have the most marvelous cast and crew and so much of the joy that comes across on the screen in born from this connection we had with our crew. That is like a deep family bond and all these people collaborated so beautifully. That daily life of all of these people collaborating for one thing is a really special experience I’m going to miss.
Canter: I will just add that I am so sad, deeply, deeply heartbroken. I described it to someone that it was like when my high school boyfriend went off to college. We both knew parting ways was the right thing to do and it just had to be this way, but just wish it didn’t. it felt like a breakup. It’s breaking up with 100 people that I hung out with every day for eight years.
Marcus: What’s next for Okay Goodnight?
Kauffman: We have many irons in the fire. We have a couple of things we are supervising. We are developing a science fiction, which is so much fun. It’s incredibly exciting to use a whole new part of my brain.
Lessons from Grace and Frankie? Challenge yourself no matter your age, and live “life to the fullest, fearlessly and unapologetically” are perhaps the greatest takeaways from knowing these characters. The series may be ending, but Grace and Frankie are definitely not done yet. They will continue to inspire us in this last season and the future.
Bonnie Marcus, M.ED, is the author of Not Done Yet! How Women Over 50 Regain Their Confidence and Claim Workplace Power and The Politics of Promotion: How High Achieving Women Get Ahead and Stay Ahead. An executive coach and speaker, Bonnie is also host of the podcast, Badass Women At Any Age.
