Saturday Night Live celebrates Christmas by inducting host and recurring favorite guest star Martin Short into the vaunted five-timers club (kind of surprising that it took this long). In a self-admitted “cheap ratings boost”, they load the cold open with big name cameos of fellow five timers Tom Hanks, Paul Rudd, Tina Fey, Alec Baldwin, Scarlett Johansson, Kristen Wiig, Melissa McCarthy, Emma Stone, John Mulaney and as the official jacket boy, Jimmy Fallon.
Drinks are had, secrets are confessed – Short, Wiig and Stone all hooked up (and voted for Trump), Rudd admits “Ant Man’s powers aren’t good”, Hanks never had Covid, and Baldwin has too many children – McCarthy pratfalls, insults are hurled, and everyone gets sloshed, before they gift a visibly touched Short with his much earned Five Timer’s jacket (in “exactly [his] size, a woman’s small”).
This cold open is an easy layup given the comic talent on screen, but that doesn’t make it any less entertaining.
For his monologue, Short thanks Lorne Michaels, comparing their relationship to Trump and Elon Musk, minus the sexual tension. He gets a good dig in at Steve Martin (“He would have been here tonight, but he had a conflict with me not wanting him to be here”), before helping the current cast de-stress by singing a Broadway showtune about needing a new prescription. His backstage waltz sees him kicking around greedy children, taking potshots at Armie Hammer, RFK Jr and the Sackler family, and making out with Fallon. Just in case anyone forgot that Short is one of the funniest men alive, this is a good reminder.
In the first sketch of the night, Short and Mikey Day play holiday shoppers arguing over a parking space in a mall. Yelling at each other from inside their own cars, they gesticulate and sign every insult. McCarthy shows up at the end as Short’s psychotic wife. A good showcase for everyone’s physical comedy skills, especially McCarthy, who is at her gross-out best here.
A treacly holiday short sees Kenan Thompson play a homeless man who does a good deed for Heidi Gardner’s rich lady on Christmas Eve. She repays him by buying him a makeover and taking him out to dinner. She loses track of time, prompting an angry phone call from her husband. She hands the phone over to her new friend, whose kind and noble demeanor immediately falls away as he declares “Your girl is with me now, you heard? Guess what time it is – it’s steal yo bitch o’ clock!” before stealing her car. The best Thompson has been all year.
The CIBO Express Christmas Week Christmas Parade is a roll call of stereotypical holiday travelers, such as a nervous flyer whose edible kicked in too early (“A thousand milligrams is low, right?”), TSA employee who says the same thing 12 different ways (“Bag in the bin … put you bag in the bin … if you got a bag, go ahead and put it in the bin…”), Captain Sully (Hanks reprising his role from the movie), and Paul Rudd (“Sexiest man alive? Is Tim Allen dead?”). The guest stars redeem this otherwise ho-hum annual sketch.
Musical guest Hozier performs his first song of the night ahead of the final Weekend Update of a wild 2024. Colin Jost dives into the latest news regarding Luigi Mangione, audibly taken aback by the loud applause the alleged assassin’s name provokes from the studio audience despite making a joke about how hot he is. Michael Che, meanwhile, gets huge laughs by taking aim at disgraced former congressman Matt Gaetz: “The House ethic committee has voted to release its report on sexual misconduct charges against Matt Gaetz. Gaetz said he’s just happy his girlfriend is too young to read the news.”
Their first and only guest is a drone (Bowen Yang), there to discuss the recent UAPs sightings across the country. The drone is cagey, refusing to admit who or what is controlling him: “What is so threatening about random machines in the night sky? It’s like ya’ll haven’t been to Afghanistan before.” He ends by singing a number from Wicked. Like every Yang Update spot, it’s overflowing with theater kid energy.
Per their annual holiday tradition, Jost and Che swap jokes, blind reading material written for one another. Every time out, Che gets Jost to read racist jokes, and this time he ups the ante by forcing him to read them in “Black voice”. Jost is pained, even as he does it while delivering bits about slavery and reparations and a truly dirty joke about performing cunnilingus on wife Scarlett Johansson (we get a hilarious cutaway to her losing it backstage). Che, meanwhile, is forced to defend Jay Z against recent rape allegations and admit to being at Diddy parties. The best Update bit of every year, this one impressively ups the offensive ante.
Sábado Gagante is a Spanish-language game show on Univision. The first unsuspecting contestant (Rudd) is a white member of the audience who ended up there by accident. He can’t speak Spanish so is completely baffled by the rules of the bizarre game. It’s a big loud mess, although its nice to see Dana Carvey pop in for a quick cameo.
Hozier perfroms his second song, covering The Pogues’ Fairytale of New York, the greatest Christmas song ever written (he and his chorus line clean up the infamously profane middle section). It’s not only a fitting tribute to the holiday, but to Pogues frontman Shane MacGowan, who was born on Christmas day and sadly passed away a little over a year ago.
The show closes with an airing of A Charlie Brown Christmas, with the cast dressed as the various Peanuts characters performing the film’s iconic dance scene. They are interrupted by Short’s demanding director, taking over for Charlie Brown, and his choreographer/ex-lover (Yang). Short is basically doing his Jiminy Glick character, which is always welcome.
The first episode of the 50th season that felt properly big, thanks not merely to the star wattage and holiday festivities, but Short’s ace anchoring. A well deserved victory lap for one of the show’s favorite hosts and one of our great living comedic geniuses.
