There are several lessons to be had from Ronda Rousey’s apology for sharing, however briefly, a Sandy Hook conspiracy video.
The first is that it’s never too late to acknowledge a wrong and take responsibility for it. In a post Thursday night on X, the former UFC champ apologized for something she’d done 11 years ago, a veritable lifetime in this age of warp-speed news cycles fueled by our constant connection.
The apology followed a disastrous “Ask Me Anything” on Reddit, in which Rousey was inundated with questions about her posting of a video that cast doubt on the horrific massacre that killed 20 first-graders and six educators and shattered the idea there were still some places in this country safe from gun violence.
Regardless of the convenience of the timing, Rousey said she has long regretted sharing the video. She’d written an apology many times over, even tried to put it in her last book, but never published it. Out of fear. Out of shame. Out of concern it would send others down the conspiratorial rabbit hole. Out of calculated self-interest.
Whatever the reasons, she now knows they weren’t worth more than making amends for the harm she’d done.
“I convinced myself that apologizing would just reopen the wound for no other reason than me selfishly trying to make myself feel better, that I would hurt those suffering even more and possibly lead more people down the black hole of conspiracy bullshit by it being brought up again just so I could try to shake the label of being a ‘`’Sandy Hook truther,’ ” Rousey wrote.
“I apologize that this came 11 years too late, but to those affected by the Sandy Hook massacre, from the bottom of my heart and depth of my soul I am so so sorry for the hurt I caused. I can’t even begin to imagine the pain you’ve endured and words cannot describe how thoroughly remorseful and ashamed I am of myself for contributing to it. I’ve regretted it every day of my life since and will continue to do so until the day I die,” Rousey wrote, putting the words in bold so no one would miss their importance.
The second lesson is apologies are owed even if no one knows you’ve done wrong.
Rousey said she “quickly realized my mistake” in posting the video and took it down. Somehow, despite being at the height of her fame and dominance in her sport, what she’d done went largely unnoticed by the general public. MMA fans might have been aware, but Rousey was able to move on unscathed.
A wrong is a wrong, however, whether the whole world sees it or it’s only known in the quiet of your own heart.
“I should have been canceled,” Rousey wrote. “I would have deserved it. I still do.”
The last, and most important, lesson in Rousey’s apology is her word of warning.
There have always been people who’ve been suckered into believing nonsense; those newspapers in the grocery store checkout line with headlines about alien babies and Elvis sightings weren’t there for decoration. But it’s gotten worse in the last 15 years, with bad actors preying on people’s fears and ignorance and, in the worst cases, hate.
It’s how we ended up with a pizza parlor in Washington, D.C., getting shot up. People taking a horse dewormer to combat COVID or downplaying the seriousness of a pandemic that killed millions worldwide. People storming the U.S. Capitol and attacking police officers. An NFL MVP spreading misinformation under the guise of “doing his own research.”
An MMA star reposting a video questioning the veracity of the bullet-riddled bodies of 6- and 7-year-olds and the bottomless chasm of their parents’ grief.
But rather than leading to some enlightened truth, Rousey wrote, dabbling in conspiracy theories only sends you further into the abyss.
“To anyone else that’s fallen down the black hole of bullshit,” Rousey wrote, “it doesn’t make you edgy or an independent thinker, you’re not doing your due diligence entertaining every possibility by digesting these conspiracies. They will only make you feel powerless, afraid, miserable and isolated. You’re doing nothing but hurting others and yourself.
“Regardless of how many bridges you’ve burned over it, stop digging yourself a deeper hole, don’t get wrapped up in the sunk cost fallacy, no matter how long you’ve gone down the wrong road, you should still turn back.”
It’s never too late for the truth. Or an apology.
