Bob’s Burgers takes its holiday episodes seriously. Each year brings a handful of seasonal specials, hitting everything from Halloween to Easter.
But over 14 seasons, no holiday looms larger on the Belcher family calendar than Thanksgiving. It makes sense that a family with a restaurant would take the biggest meal of the year seriously. But patriarch Bob goes above and beyond in his commitment to make a perfect meal, only to have it perpetually ruined by forces both outside and inside his own control.
This year’s episode would have marked the 12th Thanksgiving episode in the long-running cartoon’s arsenal … except it was a long tale about raccoons and burnout instead of a 22-minute treatise on turkey. No matter, we’ve got 11 Thanksgiving episodes lingering to fall back on — and enough time to divine the classics from the merely “pretty good.”
That’s enough to form a quorum for a proper ranking. Let’s start at the bottom.
11
Season 7: "The Quirkducers"
Synopsis: The kids create a Thanksgiving play to ensure a half-day of school before the holiday and instead induce trauma on their classmates with turkey guts. Fortunately, Tina is there to save the day.
The musical itself is memorable and the b-plot of Linda finding, then nurturing, a potato that looks like her grandfather is cute and funny. But there’s not much meat to sort through here. Without great jokes, this one slides toward the bottom of the list.
10
Season 13: "Putts-giving"
Synopsis: The Belchers go mini-golfing on Thanksgiving. That’s about it.
Yeah, not much happens. It’s funny enough but ultimately one of the lesser “Louise acts like a jerk, then takes responsibility” arcs the show hits often.
9
Season 11: "Diarrhea of a Poopy Kid"
Synopsis: An anthology episode that revolves around Gene on the toilet, hearing Thanksgiving-tinged takes on Air Force One, Predator and Armageddon.
Is it dumb? Hooo buddy, yes. But few other shows could pull off sub-MadTV pitches like “The Bread-ator” or “Air Force One, with pears” and make it as funny. We get a deep roster of supporting players in this one, followed by a very Gene-ish explanation for his stomach flu — it’s food poisoning from eating bad, moldy chicken.
8
Season 6: "Gayle Makin' Bob Sled"
Synopsis: A (fake) ankle injury keeps Gayle from coming over on a snowy Thanksgiving. It’s up to an increasingly annoyed Bob to save her — and the family to finish his cooking.
Loren Bouchard excels at creating quirky characters you don’t want to spend much time with, dating back to his days creating Home Movies (shoutout to all the Walter & Perry fans out there). Foremost among them is Linda’s sister Gayle, who is the human equivalent of walking into a spiderweb at all times.
Despite this episode’s glorious title, there’s a whooooole lot of Gayle involved. While the lesson is a treatise on Bob’s love for his family (even the ones he didn’t sign up for), it still fails to live up to the high standard of the rest of the show’s holiday specials.
7
Season 9: "I Bob Your Pardon"
A bigger concept than most Bob’s Burgers Thanksgiving episodes, “I Bob Your Pardon” draws the Belchers out of their comfort zone — something remarked on early. Here we get a chase scene, a dramatic save from a pack of coyotes, the abject powerless-ness of the deputy mayor and, importantly, a cameo from a goat with fart-mony. There’s a lot going on, and it’s all great.
6
Season 12: "Stuck in the Kitchen with You"
Synopsis: A visit to the Elegant Doily nursing home turns into a service day. For Bob, that means cooking all the food (and clashing with Louise). For the kids, it’s a matter of a fake Thanksgiving day parade.
Every trip to the Elegant Doily Retirement Community is a winner, whether it’s to reunite Meryl with a retired admiral, chasing down Zeke’s grandmother (do what?) or performing acts of quilt sabotage. Sgt. Bosco gets a rare win when Linda points out how horrible his mother is (trust me, it makes sense after you spend a little time with her).
Bob’s Thanksgiving mania and desire to parent effectively come into conflict when he and Louise clash over meal prep (and fire). And the rest of the kids make an adjustable bed/PPE parade float to bring joy in arguably the dourest place in all of the greater Ocean Avenue area.
5
Season 10: "Now We're Not Cooking with Gas"
Synopsis: After years on the waiting list, Bob purchases a fancy heritage turkey for dinner — only for the gas to go out across his entire block on Thanksgiving day.
Bob’s mania truly takes over in this episode — impressive, considering he stages a multi-day investigation into turkey sabotage one year, spends another one dragging his sister-in-law through the snow in a kiddie pool and at one point nearly gets shot (several times) for a turkey named Lance. The prestige protein breaks his brain, leading him to ignore stern warnings from the fire department, force every member of the family into jobs way above their pay scale and, eventually, nearly destroying Tina’s gratitude tree.
In the end, he comes to his senses — just in time to stare down a massive legal fine avoided only by his own hysterical crying. It works out though; a blackened, charred turkey is the best Thanksgiving meal the Belchers have ever made.
4
Season 5: "Dawn of the Peck"
Synopsis: The Fischoeders organize a “running of the turkeys” 5K and cheap out on it, leading to mayhem and destruction. Also, Bob gets drunk.
I have never identified more with Robert Belcher than the moment he gets frustrated with his family, turns to his old friend “day whiskey” and fixes his problems with a steady dose of old music at an inappropriate volume — in this case Donna Summer, whom Regular Sized Rudy is gonna love. We also get great moments of rich doofus ineptitude from the Fischoeders, steady doses of Teddy and Rudy (together at last!) and everyone’s favorite carny, Mickey, who is at this point still voiced to perfection by Bill Hader. In the end, Linda saves the day with head butts, proclaiming herself to be the flamboyant leader of humans and rotten fowl alike.
3
Season 4: "Turkey in a Can"
Synopsis: Bob’s “Father of the Brine” marinade gets continually ruined when an unknown culprit repeated jams his turkeys into the toilet overnight.
There’s so, so much to love here. Linda and Gayle sing a song about gravy whose chorus revolves around the words “sailors in your mouth.” Bob inadvertently flirts with the butcher at the grocery store while repeatedly buying turkeys, casually and honestly assessing both his own prospects and sexuality in the process.
Tina attempts to prove her maturity with table talk like “… in this economy?” It’s all incredible, leaving the sorta-obvious whodunnit in the center of the episode to take a backseat to character beats and, eventually, further confirmation the Belchers remain one of the most supportive families on television.
2
Season 8: "Thanks-hoarding"
Synopsis: Teddy has to host his family’s Thanksgiving. He needs help. So much help.
This may be a divisive call, but the added exposure to Teddy’s life — and the continued reveals of what makes him so … Teddy — set this episode apart for more than just the fact it’s really, really funny. Teddy’s a fixer, and we learn it all stems from his place as peacemaker between two perpetually sparring parents.
He’s taken that role upon himself ever since, leading to a steady accumulation of aquarium pumps, rebar, drained magic 8-balls and broken waffle makers in what was once a dining room. While Teddy panic sweats his way through a decluttering and meal prep, the Belchers carefully walk him through each step, showcasing the kindness and patience that tell us exactly what Bob won’t admit. He’s way more than a customer and more than a friend. He’s the weird uncle the kids never had.
1
Season 3: "An Indecent Thanksgiving Proposal"
Synopsis: Mr. Fischoeder offers five months rent to, well, rent Bob’s family for Thanksgiving in hopes of rekindling an old, homewrecking flame.
The first Thanksgiving episode still stands as the best thanks to a bevy of memorable moments and incredible jokes. Mr. Fischoeder’s bribes go beyond rent and to a ticket system rewarding whichever Belcher child embodies his twisted vision of a loving family the closest (it’s decidedly not Tina). Linda crafts and sings a Thanksgiving song that songs suspiciously like something Dan Mintz made up on the spot (it was).
Bob gets drunk on absinthe, abducts a turkey named Lance and nearly gets shot (RIP Lance). In the end, everything (sort of) works out and Louise cashes in her tickets for the holiday’s prized possession; a portrait of the Fischoeder-Belchers guarding the family crest of nine schlongs.
