People have left in disagreement after a woman apparently "lost it" at her father's funeral and kicked out his girlfriend of five years.
The daughter, who is an only child, says she recently attended her dad's wake and funeral during which she met his partner for the first time.
She said that although the couple were together for five years, the pair never got to know each other or interacted prior to the man's death.
However, the woman says she discovered the duo were dating two years into their relationship after she saw text messages on his phone.
In a post on Reddit, she said the relationship with her dad was strained and stated she only "officially" became aware of the woman, called Pam, when she saw a picture of her on her father's work desk.
The anonymous poster claims she made all the arrangements for her father's funeral, but things turned tense at the memorial when Pam arrived.
The woman wrote: "Pam tried contacting Dad’s phone/messenger- I assume she saw all the posts on his Facebook and the funeral date online. I never responded to her.
"Yet before his wake started, Pam and her family showed up- and planned to be a part of the services! I came in at 5pm for the 6pm wake, and she and her 3 sons, DILs, grandkids were there talking with some of his friends. She’s known them all for 3-4 years!
"I was floored. The funeral people asked me why I didn’t include her, since she’s his significant other. I told them right in front of everyone that I’ve lived with my dad all this time (we had issues since I became an adult) these last 5 years and I never met or knew her.
"At this point Pam got out of the provided chair and tried to play it cool by saying 'oh come now!' while pulling me aside to 'chat'.
"During this chat she told me 'you’re going to embarrass yourself and father if you don’t just keep it together. I can't believe you refused to meet me until now but that was your choice. Now let’s get through this and figure it out later'."
The woman said she "lost it" and requested that Pam and her family be removed from the parlour or else she would call the police.
She added: "Pam wanted to stay, because in her mind she was all but legally his wife. I said no, because I’m the family, and she should have thought this through.
"Right before the 6pm service, she and her whole family left, and it was just me facing, among other things, constant questionings of 'where’s Pam? Why couldn’t Pam come? We saw Pam outside leaving, why did you do that?'"
The woman then questioned whether she was an a**hole for not putting on a brave face and letting Pam be included as 'family' in the funeral.
People were split down the middle on whether the woman reacted appropriately.
Those who felt she responded correctly said:
"Yikes. Based on what you’ve said here, the real a**hole is your dad. He told Pam you didn’t want to meet her, he didn’t tell you that she exists, and then he dies and leaves you to sort it out? So [not an a**hole], but I don’t think Pam is either. It’s your dad."
"Dad is the a**hole but so is Pam. Even with him telling her op didn’t want to meet. If I were in that position, the first thing anyone would do is talk to the daughter and offer sympathy.
"At the very least not walk in there and act like it’s your show and you’re the centre of attention. She had no right to bring her whole family and start moving stuff around."
"[Not an a**hole] because Pam just walked in with her family to take over the 'show'. Personally, good for you to have her and her family removed."
However, others had questions over the story, with some siding with Pam.
One said: "It seems like your dad told Pam that you didn't want to meet her. I have been taught not to speak ill of the dead so I will go with [not an a**hole] but you are getting a pass only because you were clearly grieving.
"You were unconscionably rude to someone who was clearly very important to your father at a time when she was also grieving."
A second commented: "[Not an a**hole] but you're angry at your dad and Pam is a representation of everything he ever did wrong by you."
