A co-parenting advocate has urged Paloma Faith to re-evaluate her understanding of the important role good co-parenting plays after saying she doesn’t “like” the word.
The How To Leave A Man hit-maker, 42, made her feelings on the subject clear as she discussed her experience of navigating being a single parent while appearing on ITV’s Lorraine on Wednesday.
Faith shares two daughters with ex-husband Leyman Lahcine, whom she married in 2017 before confirming they had split in 2022 after nine years together.
While confessing he is an “amazing” father who does spend time with their children, she told host Lorraine Kelly: “I don't like the word ‘co-parent’ because ‘co’ implies to me that it's 50/50 and I don't believe it ever is.
“Unless, there are some anomalies, and there are men who write to me who are like, ‘I don't like the fact you say that’ and there are definitely some men pulling the main bulk of the work, but in majority of cases, the kind of unspoken silent mental load that a mother does and usually timewise, it's not 50/50 either.
“I'm not saying that I don't think that my children's father is amazing but I think it's quite important that we acknowledge what's actually happening, which is that women are doing too much.
“So I don't use the word ‘co-parent’, I say ‘oh my kids go to their dad’s a few nights a week’ and I'm so happy that they do that and that they've got a lovely father, but let's not over compliment them because they do get that all the time… Let’s not over applaud them for actually parenting.”
While Aaron Dale, author and content creator of @raisingboys_2men. says he “appreciates” Faith’s perspective and agrees mothers should be recognised for their “significant and often unspoken contributions”, he thinks she’s missing the real point.
He told the Standard: “I appreciate the perspective shared about the realities of parenting roles. It's important to recognise the significant and often unspoken contributions that mothers make.However, it's also crucial to remember that co-parenting is about collaboration and focusing on what's best for the child.
“This doesn't always mean a perfect 50/50 split; instead, it's about respecting and supporting each other in the roles we play,” the single father of two boys from Kent continued.
“Think of co-parenting like being part of a sports team. Not every player contributes the same way or in the same amount, but each role is crucial for the team's success.
“The goal isn't for everyone to contribute 50/50, but to play their part effectively so the team thrives.”
“Similarly, in co-parenting, the focus should be on working together, supporting each other, and doing what's best for the child, even if the contributions aren't exactly equal."
