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Paloma Faith has revealed that she doesn't use the word ‘co-parent’ when referring to her and her ex-partner's parenting arrangement as it ‘over compliments men’ and doesn't 'reflect' the realities of parenting after seperation.
When you realise it's the right time to walk away from a relationship, saving children from the damaging consequences staying together 'for the kids' can have, getting together a co-parenting arrangement is likely the most important thing on your mind.
But singer/songwriter Paloma Faith has now revealed why, post-split from her ex-partner, she has decided not to use the term co-parent when talking about the parenting arrangements she has agreed on with the father of her two daughters.
"I don't like the word co-parent because co implies it is 50/50 and I don't believe it is," she revealed in an interview on ITV's Lorraine. Explaining her stance, she said, "I'm not saying that I don't think my children's dad is amazing, but I think we need to say what is actually happening and not over compliment the men."
What is 'actually happening', Faith says, is men simply fulfilling the bare minimum of parenting duties. While she agreed that some fathers do actively participate in a significant portion of parenting once they've split with their partner, the singer still believes that mothers are the ones bearing most of the mental load and spend more time with the children.
She added, "I don't use the word 'co-parent', I say, 'Oh my kids go to their dads a few nights a week' and I'm so happy that they do that and that they've got a lovely father. But let's not over compliment them because they do get that all the time... Let's not over applaud them for actually parenting."
Faith has been incredibly candid about the heartbreak she has experienced following her 2022 separation from her ex Leyman Lahcine, saying that the whole process has been made incredibly hard by the fact that they share children together. She's not alone as many parents who have separated or divorced need to turn to expert co-parenting tips for divorced parents and can only really figure out how to navigate the changing relationship through insight like the co-parenting boundaries to live by.
Speaking on the podcast Great Company with Jamie Laing, she spoke candidly about navigating her heartbreak through songwriting and discussed the 'different type of heartbreak' that comes after splitting with the father of your kids.
"Just because you finished the album doesn't mean the trauma has gone away," she said. "But I think this is ongoing navigation, because we have children together. And that's what makes this a different type of heartbreak album. Because the heartbreak will be forever and, and the navigation of our relationship changing shape will be forever probably till we die.
"You can't really let go of somebody you've got kids with."
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