Here’s Ali Martin’s report from Rawalpindi:
So there we go: it turns out that, wondrous though England were yesterday, Pakistan can also bat a bit. It’s also possible that pace is pace and England have none, that their spinners don’t do that much spinning, that the pitch is flat. Still, there was a hint of reverse towards the end – only a hint but you never know – so join us tomorrow to see how we go. Thanks all for your company and comments –ta-ra.
Elsewhere…
Oh gosh – godspeed, Legend.
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We see footage of Livingstone going up the stairs and his leg looks to give way. He hurt himself a while ago, hopping over a puddle, and Buttler tells us that he was managing the injury through the T20 World Cup, coming back earlier than he should’ve done because of the circumstances.
Nassem Shah tells Athers that the pitch is so good, but England played good cricket. He also notes that having come from T20, their lines were right, and he was surprised to get Stokes when he did. He was feeling his shoulder towards the end of England’s innings, but thinks it’s just because with all the T20, he needs to re-acclimatise to bowling 20-odd overs in a day, then bursts out laughing when Athers asks if it might break up. He too seems an absolutely sound chap.
Oh yeah, and he also says that there wasn’t much coming off the pitch so he tried to bowl wicket-to-wicket.
Will Jacks almost eats his own face with a smile when Nas introduces him as a Test-match cricketer; great stuff. Though he’s young, he was beginning to think it might not happen for him and he didn’t think would be his match, but Stokes called him over, said you’re in, and 10 minutes later he was getting his cap from Ollie Pope, with whom he’s played since they were eight and nine. Ahhh, that’s nice.
He says he felt a bit of pressure to score given the track, but the message from on top has been express yourself, do what you do for Surrey, enjoy yourself. He thanks Alec Stewart and Jeremy Batty for helping him believe in himself, wants to play every format, and generally comes across like a really sound young man.
In the studio, Jos Buttler jokes that Livingstone saw the way the day was going and decided to have the evening off. Trudat.
I should say, Livingstone didn’t return after tweaking a calf, so England didn’t have his variations, but while that’s a shame for him, nothing we’ve seen suggests he’d have made any difference.
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Well batted those boys. Shafique in particular, but Imam too, batted beautifully, apparently unbothered by the scoreboard pressure – which probably tells us about the track and also what they think of England’s spin attack. I’d like to say conditions will change tomorrow, but let’s be real, they probably won’t.
Close of play on day two: Pakistan 181-0 after England all out for 657
51st over: Pakistan 181-0 (Shafique 89, Imam ul-Haq 90) I guess on this pitch, the other thing we should say is that we don’t know how it’ll wear – I don’t suppose a raging day-five bunsen is likely but we don’t need that, we need it to do just enough. Slow, slow, quick is usually the pace of play on the sub continent, and we know England have a collapse in them, Pakistan too. Anyhow, Leach flicks between over and around, as cunning as a fox who’s just been appointed Professor of Cunning at Oxford University– to continue the – Blackadder tip – and Imam takes two to deep backward. The umpires take the light, and in the time that takes, it gets too dark to continue, so that is stumps.
50th over: Pakistan 179-0 (Shafique 89, Imam ul-Haq 88) This one and one more, or just this one, reckon Ath and Nass, Jacks wheeling through a maiden. It looks pretty dark now.
49th over: Pakistan 179-0 (Shafique 89, Imam ul-Haq 88) Five dots and one Imam cleanse over mid off. I like the way these two have kept almost perfect pace with each other pretty much all the way through their inningseseses.
“It is a shame this game is likely to peter out into a draw,” says Michael Galvin. “It justifies English wickets that provide help to the bowlers with a ball that swings and seams.”
I enjoy the varied conditions – though these are too much – but as Athers says, the most exciting cricket comes when the ball is slightly on top of the ball.
48th over: Pakistan 175-0 (Shafique 89, Imam ul-Haq 84) Jacks replaces Stokes and Shafique drops to mid off, sprinting a single – that’s admirable, given how bushed he must be – and Robinson hits with a shy, but he was home. Next ball, something for England to … hang onto, as Lord Flasheart was wont to say, Jacks deceiving Imam in the flight … but Imam backs himself, playing his drive anyway and getting the ball over cover for four. A single follows, the lights are on, and I daressay we’ve not long to go.
47th over: Pakistan 169-0 (Shafique 88, Imam ul-Haq 79) Common sense! Not always present in cricket, but as they try to take a drinks break, Stokes points out that they’ll only be out for another 15 minutes or so – I love that, he genuinely thinks he’s about to personality something into happening – and everyone agrees to just get on with it. So Imam plays out two dots from Leach, then skips down and whams over the top for four. There’s a man on the fence but he’s wider, for all the difference it makes; Leach tries some flight, so Imam skips down again and clatters low through long on for four. In comms, Nas says that Leach needs to develop some overspin, so the ball drops on batters.
46th over: Pakistan 161-0 (Shafique 88, Imam ul-Haq 71) Stokes hunts for reverse –good luck old mate – and Shafique eases him away for three to deep point. A single follows, then another short ball is collared for four.
“What’s the record for the most centuries scored by both teams in a Test?” wonders Mark Hooper.
I can answer that! I can answer that! as Bros didn’t croon. It’s eight, West Indies v South Africa at Antigua in 2005, by De Villiers, Smith (obviously), Kallis (obviously), Prince, Gayle (x3), Sarwan, Chanderpaul, Bravo.
45th over: Pakistan 153-0 (Shafique 81, Imam ul-Haq 70) We finished at 38 minutes past the hour yesterday but it was, apparently, overcast whereas today it’s sunny, so we might get a bit longer. Two singles from this latest Leach over and given Anderson was more threatening than he was plus we’re near the close, I wonder if it might be worth trying pace from both ends.
44th over: Pakistan 151-0 (Shafique 80, Imam ul-Haq 69) In bustles Stokes again, three bouncers to open the over, then deciding he’s not suffering enough, he punches himself in the face a few times and puts Snow Patrol on his Walkman. Two singles follow, Shafique’s to deep square and Imam’s towards mid on.
43rd over: Pakistan 149-0 (Shafique 79, Imam ul-Haq 68) Leach tries the short, wide one – clever clever – and Shafique makes sure he doesn’t miss out, stretching to cut away, cut away for four. Which I’m now singing to Real McCoy while imagining I’m back in good old 1994. Why don’t we get rafts of catchy dance-pop singles anymore?
“Anyone having flashbacks to Adelaide 2006-07 yet?” wonders Kevin Wilson. Er, every night.
42nd over: Pakistan 144-0 (Shafique 74, Imam ul-Haq 68) And here he is. He’s got plenty on the leg side, so I’d imagine we’ll see some teeth-music – or, on this track, some knee music – and here we go. Two short ones then a bouncer, which Shafique evades well – it was actually a pretty decent effort from the England captain, who’s got a silver affair on his shoulder like the bionic superhero he is – then a single to square leg allows Imam to get on top of a bouncer and cart away for four. That’s woken everyone up, at least.
41st over: Pakistan 139-0 (Shafique 73, Imam ul-Haq 64) Imam tries to whack Leach over his head but squirts it to square leg so Shafique – who looks the better of the two – shows him how it’s done, stutter-stepping down and swishing a straight six like it’s nothing. I really like the look of him, and he follows it with a clever single, coming down again to drop and run, then Imam makes amends by clumping over mid off for four. Surely Stokes is now going to bowl himself unchanged until Sunday lunch?
40th over: Pakistan 127-0 (Shafique 66, Imam ul-Haq 59) Anderson has, at least, slowed down the scoring rate, but the lack of a single fielder behind the wicket tells its own story. Maiden.
39th over: Pakistan 127-0 (Shafique 66, Imam ul-Haq 59) The light still looks reasonable as Leach begins his 12th over, milked for three. It’s surely got to be time for Robinson.
38th over: Pakistan 124-0 (Shafique 63, Imam ul-Haq 59) Oh this is lovely! Shafique leans down the track and meets Anderson’s inswing outside off, wristing it for four through midwicket, *IVA Richards-style. Two to backward point follow, then two more to deep square … then another single to that area. Naturally, Anderson then offers the batter some advice, perhaps on hair products, because his barnet really looks terrific today – even by its high standards.
37th over: Pakistan 117-0 (Shafique 56, Imam ul-Haq 59) Eeesh, Imam annihilates Leach back down the ground, so Umpire Raza interprets the dying swan with no little grace as the ball burns past his lugole and to the fence.
“The pokey size of our global village never fails to astound,” emails Ben Heywood. “Sitting here in Montenegro I forwarded Andy Flintoff’s 29th-over missive to my brother and mum in Brisbane, as I’m pretty sure they were respectively, best mate and Spanish teacher to the aforementioned Stuart ‘Haggis’ Harris from Dereham in Norfolk back in the 90s. ‘He was my favourite student!’ replies Mum. ‘But who is Andy Flintoff?’
Genuinely not sure how to answer that one.”
Tremendous! Mainly because she preferred her son’s mate to her son, but for various other reasons too.
36th over: Pakistan 113-0 (Shafique 56, Imam ul-Haq 55) Anderson isn’t exactly threatening, but there’s at least some anticipation that we might, at some point, anticipate anticipating something happening. Imam pinches a single to mid off, the only run form the over, but the mood in the field has changed a little.
35th over: Pakistan 112-0 (Shafique 56, Imam ul-Haq 54) Meantime, Leach returns Imam shoves into the on side for one, then Shafique takes two to midwicket – I thought that was going to the fence but it’s a rare one that doesn’t – then he whams into Jennings’ chest at short leg! He can’t snaffle on the way down, and that was hit hard so not a huge chance, but it was something. It’s good to know the protection works, anyway.
“England currently a very unbalanced team,” muses Peter Norman. “Far too many nicknames ending in ‘e’ or ‘y’, and not enough ending on ‘o’. Surely within their imagination to have Jacko rather than Jacksie. I think Ben Duckett would likely agree as well.”
Unless he’s from Stoke (which he isn’t). But I can’t agree on Jacksie, partly because it’s funny, and partly because of the rules If he was Jack, or even Jackson, Jacko is fine. But I’m not robbing him of his plural.
34th over: Pakistan 109-0 (Shafique 54, Imam ul-Haq 53) There’s a little bit of something for Anderson now, so we might see more of him – and Robinson, and some of Stokes – in whatever we get of this session.
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…the soft signal was out, but that no longer matters unless the tech’s jiggered, which it isn’t, and the third umpire, Marais Erasmus, whose call it is, concludes ball bounced into glove.
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…but no, that’s bounced I think…
There’s a glove…
34th over: Pakistan 109-0 (Shafique 54, Imam ul-Haq 53) Here comes Anderson again, going around to the lefty Imam in the hope that he can target the stumps; he’s turned away for a single, then goes back over to the right-handed Shafique. AND HAVE A LOOK! He glances one around the corner, Pope snaffles it diving down the leg side – it’s a brilliant take – but did he get hand under ball before it bounced?!
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We go again…
Teatime email: “On nicknames, could I point out they’re not always necessary?” says Kim Thonger. “I have a dear friend called Fudge. It’s his real surname and quite adequate in all circumstances. He also possesses a magnificently eccentric golf swing that sometimes causes a ‘fade’ so powerful he can go over an adjacent dual carriageway or river into a neighbouring county. Fudge then becomes both a noun and a verb, as in, ‘you proper fudged that one Fudge’.”
33rd over: Pakistan 108-0 (Shafique 54, Imam ul-Haq 52) Root fires them in and Pope takes one nicely down the leg side. Stokes brings in mid on and mid off – schoolboy and schoolgirl, like the wanna chant with the bowlers, says Nas, trying to tempt the batters to hit over the top before tea, which is at the end of this over or the next. They don’t – Shafique takes the final delivery off his tootsies for two, and that is indeed tea,
“How long before ‘Stokesy’ comes on to bowl bouncers?” wonders Michael (not Mikey) Duggan. “I assume he will give it a go, as we don’t look like taking wickets any other way.”
I agree, the possibility of wickets is solely in our collective imagination. There’s not enough in this track for bouncers to work; Stokes will need to personality the batters out – which isn’t beyond him. See you in 15.
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32nd over: Pakistan 106-0 (Shafique 52, Imam ul-Haq 52) Heeeeeere’s Jimmy! If there’s reverse, it’s fair to assume he’ll fine it; the problem, as Nas points out, is his lack of speed through the air. He has, though, bowled beautifully in India, so there’s that … but this is, I’m afraid, a whole cup of nahman. Nothing’s doing anything, which might not be possible but remains the case, and a one to Shafique followed by a two to Imam adds three to the score.
“ I’m wondering what size of first innings lead will satisfy Pakistan?” says Kim Thonger. “Should they declare on 850? Or press on to 900? If 900, and England revert to their traditional batting collapse in their second innings Pakistan might not need to bat twice?"
Ben Stokes giving an “It’s just the way we play” interview would be sensational.
31st over: Pakistan 103-0 (Shafique 51, Imam ul-Haq 50) Imam nudges into the off side for one, and that’s his fifty. Both these lads have batted well, so Root tries a bouncer – it’s pretty sharp as it goes and Pope, who must’ve known it was coming, gathers well. a single to Shafique follows, and I wonder if we’re not done with records in thisTest yet.
“Citizen journalism it is then,” says Eamonn Maloney of our lacking Australia v Windies OBO. “In sum, WI test cricket is still in a deeply depressing spiral, epitomised by the proximity of the phrases ‘Roston Chase’ and ‘frontline spinner’, and Australia keep on being Australia.”
It’s such a shame what’s happened to West Indies – their great sides weren’t just among the best cricket has ever seen but the best sport has ever seen. They do still have some fine players, but the system doesn’t seem to be working.
30th over: Pakistan 101-0 (Shafique 50, Imam ul-Haq 49) Imam takes a single towards midwicket, the only run from the over … but during it we see Jimmy-y beginning a few light stretches., then he nips off. We’ll soon enjoy the sight of England’s quicks extracting nothing from this pitch, rather than England’s spinners. A change is as good as a rest and all that.
29th over: Pakistan 100-0 (Shafique 50, Imam ul-Haq 48) Imam comes down, opens his stance, and flows with the spin, sending Root for four through cover. A single follows, raising the 100 without loss, and I’m beginning to suspect there’s not much for the bowlers in this track.
“I knew someone from Norfolk with the surname Harris whose nickname was Haggis,” says Andy Flintoff, partly because his first name was Stuart, and in a Norfolk accent, that shortens to Stoo and he hated that.”
Stoo Haggis, what’s not to like?
28th over: Pakistan 95-0 (Shafique 50, Imam ul-Haq 43) Shafique hammers Jacks through cover for four, but misses the next ball which moves away in the air a little bit. Shafique is clearly spooked by this, zetzing the final ball over the over, again through cover and again for four, raising a fine fifty – his fourth, to go with two tons, and after seven matches, his Test average is 66.90. Decent.
27th over: Pakistan 87-0 (Shafique 42, Imam ul-Haq 43) Root replaces Leach and sends down a maiden, Decent start.
“Surely your own nickname is ready-made, being Danny?” says John Starbuck. “You know, as in versus the world. Anyway, in view of the pre-match indispositions, Jacksie is a pretty good reference. This game will always be remembered as the Jacksie Fracas.”
I had a brief period as an eight-year-old when I decided I liked Danny, and of course my mates who knew me then still rag me for it now. But at that age, because I was a Jewish boy called Daniel in the 80s and90s, I was always Harris because there were so many other Daniels – I was in my late teens before anyone apart from my parents and grandparents called me Daniel. What I notice these days is that I tell people my name is Daniel, then the next time they use it they call me Dan like we’re boyz. I don’t mind Dan, especially as my wife does, but I am intrigued by the desire to intimate intimacy.
26th over: Pakistan 87-0 (Shafique 42, Imam ul-Haq 43) …and see that at no point is the foot above or out of the crease. I’d hoped that by fumbling, Pope had somehow got an opportunity that wouldn’t have existed had he taken the ball cleanly, but now joy. I don’t , though. think that was a chance.
26th over: Pakistan 87-0 (Shafique 42, Imam ul-Haq 43) Jacks has had a long bowl to get acclimatised – this is his eighth over – and when Shafique sees his third delivery land wide, he knows it won’t spin so eases away on the off side for four. And now look! Jacks temps Shafique into a drive that he misses, Pope doesn’t gather cleanly, removes bails, and claims a stumping. The umpires have a look…
25th over: Pakistan 83-0 (Shafique 38, Imam ul-Haq 43) Leach wheels through a maiden which, from an England perspective is something. From a Pakistan perspective, this is going very nicely – both batters have found a good tempo, and they’re putting pressure back on England’s attack while taking it off their own, by making them look impotent too.
24th over: Pakistan 83-0 (Shafique 38, Imam ul-Haq 43) It’s been a taxing introduction to Test-Match CricketTM for Jacksie, whose first ball of this seventh over is clarted down the ground for four. A single follows, and England are, to switch disciplines of a KP phrase, just letting Pakistan bat here. Surely they need to try something soon?
23rd over: Pakistan 74-0 (Shafique 34, Imam ul-Haq 38) Stokes moves the man behind square on the leg side, so Shafique immediately tickles uppishly around the corner for four – the only runs from the over. I’m now England-nicknaming the OBO contingent: Smythy, Harrisy, Aldreddy, De Lisley, Jimmy.
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22nd over: Pakistan 74-0 (Shafique 34, Imam ul-Haq 38) I think Livingstone hurt his calf, which is annoying as England presumably want him to bowl, but helpful as Keaton Jennings is now at short leg, where he’s expert. And this is better from Jacks, Imam unsure whether to come or stay, doing a bit of both and edging one behind the wicket. Back to nicknames are we: Creepy, Ducky, Popey, Rooty, Brooky, Stokesy, Livi, Jacksie, Robbo, Leachy, Jimmy? I guess we should be grateful or upset, depending on your bent, that it’s not Andersony, but by my calculations, England’s banter is exactly as inventive as their spin bowling.
21st over: Pakistan 72-0 (Shafique 33, Imam ul-Haq 37) Everything is everything is another favourite tautology – particularly useful when confusing oneself with words, ideas, and how little sense the world, cosmos and universe make – while England were batting last evening, for example. Leach sends down five dots, then Imam eases three to square leg and Livingstone seems to tweak something on the chase; he calls on the physio because that’s drinks.
20th over: Pakistan 69-0 (Shafique 33, Imam ul-Haq 34) Ah yeah, here’s Root now. I totally understand why he’s on third – Leach is no1 and Jacks is on debut, so using them first is good man-management, though there could well be a technical aspect of which I’m unaware. But I still think he’s England’s best spinner and improving – though it turns out I wasn’t looking properly and Root was actually putting on shin guards to field at short leg. For all the difference it makes! Imam smashes a dragged-down first delivery for four as Root bottles trying out his protection, what a wimp, then after a single, Shafique comes down and drives easily through mid on for four. Then, before Leach continues, Stokes and Anderson inspect the ball to see if it’s battered enough to reverse, which tells us that even if it isn’t, it must be close. Nine off the over.
19th over: Pakistan 60-0 (Shafique 29, Imam ul-Haq 29) Shafique comes down and bludgeons Leach over the top for two. He doesn’t get all of it – if he had, it would’ve gone miles – but they run two, add two singles, and there’s no real threat out there. The things is, though, the quantity of runs England scored and the speed at which they got them means that there is time in the match for a result even if Pakistan make a big score too. I think we might see Joe Root soon – for my money the best of England’s tweakers.
18th over: Pakistan 56-0 (Shafique 26, Imam ul-Haq 28) Er, no. Imam back-cuts Jacks’ first ball for two. But four more dots follow, then a bit of dip on the final delivery that has the batter coming forward and missing. There’s an appeal, but when it’s rejected, no review.
17th over: Pakistan 54-0 (Shafique 16, Imam ul-Haq 26) Leach is in again, and he wheels through an over that, if we’re being real, Pope suggests is better than it is. It is, though, a maiden; can England find another and exert some pressure?
16th over: Pakistan 54-0 (Shafique 26, Imam ul-Haq 26) Welcome to the real football factories Test cricket, young man. Shafique twinkles down and flows Jacks’ first deliver back over his heed for six. Not much need for leg slip and silly mid-off currently, but Jacks does bring the batter forward and as Pope congratulates him, we learn that his nickname is Jacksie which, I can’t lie, elicited a schoolboy snigger from a 43-year-old. A single follows, and Pakistan are extremely comfy out there.
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15th over: Pakistan 47-0 (Shafique 19, Imam ul-Haq 26) Imam absolutely creams Leach through cover for four, the only run from the over, and England need to hope it starts reversing pronto.
14th over: Pakistan 43-0 (Shafique 19, Imam ul-Haq 22) I blathered about this in the summer, but while South Africa were whacking England at Lord’s, I was chatting to a mate of a mate about why that was happening, and he said “We’ve got a saying in Pakistan.” I prepared myself for beautiful aphorism, and he went “Pace is pace”. Which is just perfect because it’s so true, and when it’s that true, tautology beats flowers. It it what it is – and, as per James Wade, it isn’t what it isn’t. Send in your favourite tautologies! Anyway, we digress: England don’t have pace, but Pakistan do and look how that worked out. Two byes off the over.
13th over: Pakistan 41-0 (Shafique 19, Imam ul-Haq 22) I wonder whether, if England were going to bowl spin from both ends this early, they might’ve picked another frontliner? I absolutely wondered how they were going to get 20 wickets when I saw the team and I’m still wondering now, even with their 12th man, SB Pressure. Anyhow, Imam turns Leach around the corner for four, the only runs from the over.
12th over: Pakistan 37-0 (Shafique 19, Imam ul-Haq 18) Morning everyone and thanks Tanya. I did indeed spill some fabric softener, right as my wife arrived home, but you’ll be ecstatic to know we’re all good and still married. Anyway, in less important news, Will Jacks is bowling his first over in Test cricket – what a moment, what a feeling! – and after two dots, Shafique takes a step down and wristies him through midwicket for four. Next ball, he bangs to mid off and clobbers Robinson in the shin, a right sair yin; naturally, his new-ball partner enjoys a chuckle as they batsmen run one, anda further single follows.
11th over: Pakistan 31-0 (Safiq 14, Imam ul-Haq 17) Me again briefly as Daniel is wrestling with some fabric softener. A Leach maiden.
10th over: Pakistan 31-0 (Safiq 14, Imam ul-Haq 17) Robinson again, two slips and a not too silly mid-on. A raucous cheer for a couple of runs for Shafique, and with that I’ll hand over to Daniel Harris, who will take you through the rest of the day. Thanks for the emails as ever, bye!
9th over: Pakistan 27-0 (Safiq 10, Imam ul-Haq 17) Imam has an agricultural heave at Leach and Stokes brings another fielder up. Bam! Imam, face covered in white suncream, shovels him for six over mid-wicket.
8th over: Pakistan 21-0 (Safiq 10, Imam ul-Haq 11) oooh there was a sniff of an outside edge on that Ollie Robinson drop in the previous over. Anyway, Robinson pounds away, and Shafique cover drives him with a Carlos Acosta foot dab and a glorious swish of the bat.
Afternoon session
7th over: Pakistan 17-0 (Safiq 6, Imam ul-Haq 11) A high seam position for Leach, collar up, glasses on, sleeves rolled down. One squeezes past Imam’s bat but out of Pope’s gloves. An excellent maiden.
In the studio Jos Buttler is talking sense in his baby-bird soft, yet authoritative voice.
“Splendidly entertaining stuff from England,” writes Kim Thonger, “but let’s not forget Jack Leach’s fine knock of 6 from 18 balls. That’s a proper old school test match strike rate consistent with a game lasting into the fifth day. There’s a man who thinks not only of the high rollers attending the first and second days, but also cares deeply for the common man (or woman) who can only afford the reduced price seat on day 5. God bless him.”
And here is Jack Leach to start the afternoon session, ball in hand.
Overseas link
Stop that thought, Chris Drew writes with the link for the official PCB livestream, which he has working outside the UK. Click here .
A few people have asked about the TMS overseas link. Apparently there isn’t one when they’re broadcasting from abroad, I’m afraid.
Another eye-rubbing morning, Harry Brook was astounding in his bullishness in only his second Test – and finished with the highest century of the innings – 153 off 116 balls, with cameos from Stokes, Jacks and Robinson. Ok, so England lost six for 151 but once you go past 600, really, what does it matter? Three wickets for Naseem Shah, who was the pick of the bowlers and four for Zahid Mahmood, the most expensive debutant of all time. Zahid, there are a few legspinners in England who’ll take you out for a coffee. I’m going to take a quick break, back before the restart at 8.30am.
Lunch: Pakistan 17-0, 640 runs behind
6th over: Pakistan 17-0 (Safiq 6, Imam ul-Haq 11) That’s just delightful, an on-drive by Imam that sings across the rope. He cuts the next from Robinson through cover, but it is halted before it can run over the boundary boards. A couple of singles and that’s that. Pakistan survive their initial six overs, and everyone retires for an extended lunch of an hour because of Friday prayers.
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5th over: Pakistan 8-0 (Safiq 5, Imam ul-Haq 3,) The arse-end of a chance as Duckett is hit hard on the hand at short leg by Shafique, but pretty impossible to do anything with. A maiden for Anderson on the world’s flattest pitch.
4th over: Pakistan 8-0 (Imam ul-Haq 3, Safiq 5) A squirt to fine leg for a couple as Robinson continues to probe dangerously.
3rd over: Pakistan 6-0 (Imam ul-Haq 1, Safiq 5) Anderson immaculate – line and length.
From Australia, Richard Stant writes in: ”I’m enjoying it from sunny Australia. I’m kicking a ball for my puppies, a Kelpie and a border collie, and keeping an eye on the score. Enjoy the cricket. Hope the weather cheers up for you Poms.”
Why thank you Richard. I’m going to Chatsworth later today, so hoping for crisp yet sunny.
2nd over: Pakistan 3-0 (Imam ul-Haq 0, Safiq 3) Robinson stands at the end of his long run, 12 giant steps from the crease. Some neat movement, a bit of dangerous swing in to the pads. Shafique drives him gorgeously square for four. – no actually make that two after some snappy fielding on the boundary by Leach.
“Hi Tanya,” Good morning Brian Withington.
”No flooding or flexing to report from sleepy Dorridge this morning (it’s an event when I listen to Mahler, never mind conduct it).
”Let’s just hope this morning session has taught England a lesson about proper test cricket and there will be no more talk of B**ball and associated bollocks.”
Brian, may I introduce you to the Spirit of Cricket (future)?
1st over: Pakistan 1-0 (Imam ul-Haq 0, Safiq 1) A bespectacled left hander carefully plays out five balls of a 40 year old bowler on Test debut in Pakistan. A pinch of swing and a dollop of accuracy.
And so endeth the lesson, with England reaching 657 before lunch on the second day. Jimmy has the new ball, Pakistan are already out in the middle, and I have coffee.
WICKET! Anderson c Imam ul Haq b Zahid Mahmood 6 (England 657 all out)
100th over: England 657 all out ( Leach 6) Jimmy plops forward the front leg, sweeps, top edges, and Imam takes the catch at square leg. Anderson and Leach plod off, Pakistan drift off behind Babar to lick their wounds. The world’s most expensive debutant, Zahid Mahmood, finishes with 4-235.
99th over: England 653-9 ( Leach 5, Anderson 1) The overhead camera shows a good scattering of crowd with Rawalpindi stretching out in the distance. England add a run or two to their heady total.
”Hi Tanya! I’m up early OBOing and downing enough coffee to power a family car. I don’t have a burst pipe to worry about, nor have my children burst into the room — I’m conducting Mahler today and can never sleep the night before I flail/perform. Wish me luck as I follow & pore over my score…” Felix Kirkby, that, I believe, is what the young people call a flex. Good luck!
99th over: England 651-9 ( Leach 5, Anderson 1) Jimmy Anderson, aged 40, comes in to bat in Pakistan for the first time. He pockets a single then it’s all action as first Leach encroaches down the pitch and seems to get an edge to slip – but not out. Then a genuine thick edge to a Zahid googly, put down by Babar Azam at slip.
WICKET! Robinson lbw Mahmood 37 (England 649-9)
The drinks break does for Robinson! Goes for the reverse-swipe, misses and is trapped. He reviews immediately, but it is umpire’s call so off he must go.
98th over: England 647-8 (Robinson 35, Leach 4) At last Mohammad Ali is being treated with respect. Here come the onfield bottles of fizzy water, I’m going to run and put the kettle on …
97th over: England 646-8 (Robinson 34, Leach 4) Forget what I said earlier, Lunch is actually in an hour. Shah crunches through another over.
“Avid Pakistan supporter here,” writes Meherwan Polad, “but wouldn’t mind our getting flogged in this Test so that we finally stop preparing such wickets. Would rather lose a test in 3 days while giving our fast bowlers a chance. I’ve had this hope before though - but the PCB never learns from these lessons. So sad - these thome test series against the top test teams are so rare and should be so precious for Pakistan fans.”
Firm agree, miserable for the bowlers.
96th over: England 645-8 (Robinson 33, Leach 0) After the departure of Jacks, Leach almost goes without scoring after setting off for a non-existent run and being sent back by the unmoving Robinson. With a direct hit, Leach would have been run-out, but the fielder misses and the ball ends up over the rope. Babar’s air wrestling body-language suggests he’s not happy.
WICKET! Will Jacks c Naseem b Mohammad Ali 30 (England 641-8)
Jacks wafts leg side and is caught at mid=wicket.
95th over: England 637-7 (Robinson 33, Jacks 26) Thinking about becoming a svengali in my spare time and starting a cricket boy band. Naseem Shah definitely makes the cut as the sensitive floppy haired one, whose special skill is bowling at 90mph. Anyway, six off the over with a bit of this, bit of that.Five minutes till lunch.
94th over: England 632-7 (Robinson 30, Jacks 24) Runs of a useful nature, as the ground starts to fill.
“Morning, Tanya.” Hello Smylers! “I was wondering if anybody else is in the OBO–Advent of Code intersection, since they both start each morning at 5 UK time? Advent of Code provides a puzzle each day, requiring knocking up a quick computer program to find the answer. This year we’re helping Santa’s elves find special star fruit to provide magic energy for his reindeer. Today’s puzzle involves Elves playing rock-paper-scissors.”
Respect to anyone who can knock up a computer programme at 5am.
93rd over: England 628-7 (Robinson 26, Jacks 23) This is the real thing, here comes Naseem – who has been struggling with a sore shoulder this morning – with the new ball.He pushes back his thick black fringe, adjusts his chain, and runs in. Jacks sends a wide one screaming through extra cover for four, then four more up and away to bring up the fifty partnership with Robinson.
Zahid Mahmood’s figures of 31-1-227-2 make him the most expensive debutant in Test cricket history. We’ve all been there.
92nd over: England 616-7 (Robinson 18, Jacks 13) Mohammad Ali takes the new ball – it isn’t the most potent combination. Robinson swipes at the first, but then cracks two fours, one through extra cover and one down the ground.
91st over: England 608-7 (Robinson 18, Jacks 13) An over from Zahid in which England pass their highest score against Pakistan and, with a smote for six from Robinson, scream past 600.
90th over: England 598-7 (Robinson 9, Jacks 12) Robinson gives Mohammad Ali some late-hour respect, carefully blocking his last three balls.
“Poker used to be played by gnarled old pros in backrooms of casinos using the same skills and techniques for decades,” taps Hugh Malloy. “Then, online poker happened and the next generation were able to communicate and share techniques data on how to play. The result? Players became far, far more aggressive. They realised that betting big, even without the best hand, forced your opponent onto the back foot. Yes, you may well have you bluff called, but optimal play says that you will make more by not being afraid. “
So Bazball was confected in the (online) poker hall?
89th over: England 596-7 (Robinson 8, Jacks 11) The dog gets up, turns round and round five times before settling back down on the sofa with a deflated sigh. Jacks twice attempts a reverse-sweep off Zahid, to no reward.
And as a counter to Becky Chantry and her blissful Cyprus mornings I bring you Daniel Ironside. “Wowsers, that was quite a day. We will come to the cricket in a minute but first i must recount what happened approximately 2 minutes after i d sent an email to your fine self.
“Water, everywhere cascading bountifully over my lovely wooden floors. The culprit was a leaky pipe that led to the sink next to where i was sat. Diary, phone- all getting very wet as my morning brain attempted to unscramble what was developing before my eyes. No thought was cogent, i was in pure fight, flight freeze mode as i attempted manfully to direct the flow and stem the tide armed with only a small towel. Slowly the phrase stop cock, not one i wish to use to often, wafted forward from the vestiges of my prehistorically tuned mind. I seized my torch manfully/personfully and bestrode my way out side. I lifted the outside water drain cover and oh so sweetly, after some semi frenzied attempts at turning it off, managed to cut off the water supply to my household. It was a strangely bitter sweet moment as i realised i had done something ridiculously simple but never before attempted and then the slow burning of reality seeped through as i had to face the reality of clear up and painful costs.
It was, suffice to say, not really what i needed in my life before 6 30 in the morning. All was well in the end and i am incredibly fortunate to have a lovely plumber neighbour called Matt who came the same morning and sorted for what i think was a remarkably reasonable cost. HUGE shout out to you Matt, you saved my morning.”
88th over: England 593-7 (Robinson 7, Jacks 9) Naseem gets a break at last, and Mohammad Ali is summoned back into the attack – not, you imagine, with any great confidence by Babar. Relatively tidy, and that’s DRINKS!
87th over: England 589-7 (Robinson 5, Jacks 8) Mahmood continues to bowl through the agony, possibly because Haris Rauf is off the field. He now wears the air of an uncle forced to bowl at all the nieces and nephews when all he really wants to do is sit and read the paper. To make matters worse, Robinson inelegantly flails him for four.
85th over: England 576-6 (Robinson 0, Jacks 0) Will Jacks’ first boundary in Tests comes off his sixth ball, when he drives Naseem through the covers for four with a stately air. Ollie Robinson keeps out a good length ball that is creeping low.
Becky Chantry, who yesterday was watching the sun rise on her balcony has now gone a step further: “I’m currently sipping bucks fizz for breakfast (still in Cyprus) refreshed after a dip in the sea yesterday. Trying to take this morning’s tumble of wickets in the positive sense that England are trying to keep the game moving...”
84th over: England 576-6 (Robinson 0, Jacks 0) A third wicket of the morning for Shah, some relief for Pakistan, with two new batters at the crease after the end of a magnificent innings from Harry Brook – doing all he has been doing for Yorkshire, and more.
WICKET! Brook c Saud Shakeel b Naseem Shah 153 (England 576-7)
Hauls Naseem to deep square leg where Shakeel accepts another catch – 116 balls, five sixes, 19 fours, the fourth fastest 150 in Test cricket after Roy Fredricks, Mahela Jayawardene, and Brendon McCullum. Incredible in just his second Test.
83rd over: England 568-6 (Brook 145, Jacks 0) Zahid Mahmood puts his hands on his hips as Brook casually reverse-sweeps for six, sweeps for four, reverse-sweeps for another four, leans back and hammers him for four more, dallies down the pitch and spatulates him for six, before top-edging inelegantly for three. 27 from the over – the best over for a batting side for England in 29.Poor Mahmood now has 2-208 on debut.
82nd over: England 541-6 (Brook 118, Jacks 0) A super over from Naseem: first Livingstone’s wicket, then he cracks debutant Will Jacks full on the pad first ball. Babar is persuaded to take a review, but the ball passes safely down past leg.
If you’re watching, do email me and help me stay awake. So tempting to just quickly close your eyes…
WICKET! Livingstone c Saud Shakeel b Naseem Shah 9 England (539-6)
Livingstone gives a one-legged flamingo flick, Pietersen-esque, and the ball flies to deep mid-wicket where Shakeel takes the catch.
81st over: England 539-5 (Brook 117, Livingstone 9) Livingstone quick-steps down the pitch and loops Mahmood for six, then wrinkles his nose under his helmet as if it didn’t quite sing. No new ball as yet.
80th over: England 529-5 (Brook 114, Livingstone 2) A neat and tidy over from Naseem Shah, England are watchful. A brief period of calm has fallen over Ralwalpindi.
79th over: England 527-5 (Brook 113, Livingstone 1) Liam Livingstone is off the mark …with a calm and respectful single through the covers off Zahid Mahmood. A dodgy bit of fielding brings Brook a couple more to finish the over and there are six more balls due before Pakistan can take the new ball.
78th over: England 522-5 (Brook 110, Livingstone 0) Just the one miserly run from Naseem Shah’s over.
77th over: England 522-5 (Brook 109, Livingstone 0) Harry Brook brings his bat down, and flicks Zahid Mahmood, with a careless air, over long-on for six. Beautiful! Livingstone survives his first ball in Test cricket.
76th over: England 515-5 (Brook 102, Livingstone 0) The barmy army are still half way through Jerusalem when Ben Stokes steps and hollers Naseem Shah’s second ball for six – up, up and away. The commentators are still talking about whether Stokes could beat Botham to England’s fastest fifty when he’s done by a clever bit of bowling by Naseem Shah.
Morning session - WICKET! Ben Stokes b Naseem Shah 41 (England 515-5)
A slower ball, off-cutter, which clips the top of middle stump as Stokes backs away!
On Sky, they’ve just run highlights of the last day of Old Trafford 2001, followed by highlights of yesterday. Crazy days.
Just to recap yesterday’s numbers:
Most runs scored on the first day of a Test.
First team to pass 500 on the first day of a Test.
First team to score four hundreds on day one of a Test
Most runs in the opening session of a Test.
Fastest double century opening partnership in Test cricket.
“The pitch is not much different,” reports Michael Atherton at the ground. “It is hard and baked and it is just not hot enough for the cracks to open. It will be very hard to get into Pakistan’s line-up. There will be small windows of opportunity when the ball starts to reverse and the spinners will have to do a holding job, but it will be very hard work.”
Preamble
“Will you have eggs with your chips madam?” Yes please, plus mayonnaise, caviar, chocolate cake and trifle. And while I’m at it, please can you put the cricket on?
On gorged England at Rawalpindi yesterday, clocking up runs at six an over, locking up hundreds for Crawley, Duckett, Pope and Brook, cracking past 500, leaping over the all-time opening day record of 494 for six that had stood for 111 years, until bad light at last gave Pakistan from respite.
Will they aim for the perfect thousand? On this track, flatter than a peppermint cream, against this inexperienced Pakistan Test attack, they probably could. They probably won’t. But whatever they do, it will be worth watching. Play starts at 5am GMT.
