September, the month of New York Fashion Week and back to school for the kids, is also the month in which the singles of this city return to the dating apps after a summer of fun. Getting back on the apps in the first week of September ought, meteorologically, to give you perfect timing. If you swiped to meet someone you could have all those cute first few weeks of dating experiences as the nights get darker and then someone to take to all those awkward Christmas parties.
And, if you play it well, a Christmas gift just before you lose interest ahead of the January sales. This yearly pattern, obtaining for the past decade or so, aligns with the launch and success of Bumble, the dating app that “puts women in control” — that is to say women have to make the first move following a match. Launched just as the older millennials came into their 30s, it truly was a game-changer. It even became the first dating app to intercept unsolicited sexual images and seek to address women’s safety concerns. But sadly the tide has turned against this app. Why? Because women — especially those who first helped Bumble gain its popularity — are simply no longer interested in dating.
When there is dating apathy within a generation of women, the last thing they want is to make the first move
Many single and even “super”-single women, as one of my friends put it the other day, are just not interested in mingling anymore. And when there is dating apathy within a generation of women, the last thing they want is an app where they need to make the first move.
Bumble has tried to counter this with features for networking or making friends on their app now, but I fear it might be a little too late. In fact, we might actually be at the end of the dating app era, full stop. Given that social media platforms are the way many young people meet those who they then date and given millennials are increasingly jaded, mindful or mindless swiping could become a thing of the past. But if that move away from apps is not replaced with more social connection or other forms of digital connection, we could be setting up London to become yet lonelier still for a lot of people.
It is easy for people with good friendship groups who used dating apps as an addition to their social life to dismiss these apps. Many of my friends have done so. But for those with nowhere else to connect beyond apps, maybe it’s time for London’s nightlife industry to start thinking about them. Down with Bumble and bring on more physical in-person events.
It’s time to once more make them the best place to meet people.
Jenrick is not the answer for the Tories
The Tories are having another leadership contest and again it seems they are leaning towards an embarrassing Right-winger. You would have thought after how disastrous Liz Truss and the last election were for them they would have learnt their lessons — and sworn off tilting to the Right as that’s not how to regain power.
Robert Jenrick, the current front-runner for the job, recently said that he was shocked people shouting “Allahu Akbar” were not arrested by police. A ridiculous and inflammatory thing to say, yet he might be the next Tory leader because some Tories think this is what people want to hear. But this is not true, people do not want to hear dog-whistle racism from the leader of the Opposition and if the idea of giving Rob the job is to win back the voters they lost to Reform then the Tories can get ready to lose even more power and MPs at the next election.
The people who want someone like Jenrick to lead the Conservative Party are not likely to represent a very large swath of voters at the next election.
Millennials and Gen X, who are of the centre and will be the powerful voters at the next elections, and many like me, will not go anywhere near a party with a leader who seeks to sound tough by igniting hate against vulnerable members of our society. Nor would we be interested in one who portrays words spoken by many in peace as hate speech for which people should be arrested.
The Conservative Party needs to move away from populism because it will destroy them. That was evident in July when so many good Conservative MPs lost not to Reform but to the Lib Dems and Labour, two parties which moved firmly towards a position in the centre of politics.
