As a child, Nikita Kanda was locked away in a room, isolated, alone and fearing for her life at the hands of a violent abuser.
Behind her positive and bubbly exterior, entertaining the nation on BBC Asian Network Breakfast Show, Kanda, 28, still suffers flashbacks from the violence she experienced.
“I was locked away in a little room. As a child, you don’t understand what’s going on, but you know it’s not OK and you know that it’s not normal. I was very angry and confused,” Kanda tells The Independent.
The broadcaster spoke out for the first time about her experience in support of The Independent‘s Brick by Brick campaign, in partnership with Refuge. This week, it was announced that after hitting the initial target of £300,000 to build one safe home, plans are underway for building a second home.
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Kanda wants to use her experience and work with Refuge to speak more openly about domestic abuse in a bid to help more survivors, in particularly children.
“The violence left me with a lot of issues,” she recalls.
“I didn’t know who I was, what was right, what was wrong, and I remember just feeling really angry and then emotional and confused.
“When you go through things like that, it mentally scars and traumatizes you.
“I still get flashbacks now. Sometimes you think you are OK and then sometimes it just randomly pops back into your head.”
Despite the horrific abuse she faced, Kanda took strength and determination and support from close family.
“Going through something like that makes you a different person, but it makes you a stronger person. It makes you someone that is so resilient.”
Kanda admits that when she looks back on her childhood, it feels surreal. “When we talk about it, it feels like we are talking about different people. We feel like it is not us and was that a movie scene we were watching? Sometimes you can’t quite believe what you’ve been through yourself.”
Kanda hopes that telling her story will raise awareness and help those who are experiencing domestic abuse, have hope for the future.
“You will get out the other end. I know that in that moment you feel like your life’s over and you can’t get out, but you will. However bad it seems right now, I promise you in five, 10, 20 years you’ll look back and be like ‘I went through that such a horrific time in my life, but I got through it’.
“What we’re doing here with Refuge is really important. Just even by talking about it, it is helping someone to feel more comfortable, to come out and share their story, and hopefully it will save a woman’s life.”
Please donate now to the Brick by Brick campaign, launched by The Independent and charity Refuge, to help raise £300,000 to build a safe space for women where they can escape domestic abuse, rebuild their lives and make new futures.
If you or someone you know is affected by domestic abuse, you can contact Refuge’s national domestic abuse helpline for free, confidential support at 0808 2000 247.
