And here’s Ali Martin’s report from Bay Oval:
I’ll leave you with this image as I sign off, Anderson 40 years young, he and Broad ending the day with 999 wickets bowling together in Tests. We’ll be back early tomorrow morning – thanks for your messages. G’day!
Quite the field: pic.twitter.com/OK1cganKKA
— George Dobell (@GeorgeDobell1) February 16, 2023
Neil Wagner watch:
Quite the week for Neil Wagner. Wins T20 Super Smash with Northern Districts before taking four wickets on day one of Test today, including new @YorkshireCCC team-mates Root and Brook, to pass 250 Test wickets and reach 800 in first-class. Ended day one batting as night watchman.
— Tykestravels (@tykestravels) February 16, 2023
With the ball, England’s three huge stallions intimidated and prowled. Anderson (2-10) and Robinson (1-10) were immaculate, and New Zealand didn’t really have an answer – though Wagner and, in particular, Conway survived the onslaught.
Some history:
England scored 353 (from 124 overs) in the first innings at Mount Maunganui in 2019 and ended up losing by an innings.
— Yas Rana (@Yas_Wisden) February 16, 2023
Today they've declared on 325 (from 58.2 overs).#NZvENG
You didn’t expect England to be 180 for four at the end of the day, did you? Another high octave performance with the bat – with particular applause for Ben Duckett (84 from 68) and Harry Brook (89 from 81). Some slightly reckless shots towards the close, but it was all done with a plan in mind – getting the Kiwis in under lights. The declaration was a typically alpha Stokes move. Ah, here is Harry Brook:
“I think we finished off really nicely at the end, taking three wickets under lights. We haven’t been told to go out and play like that, just put pressure on the bowlers and put away the bad ball as much as I can.
“It’s good to be back out there, it felt good out there, unfortunate not to get a hundred but a Test 90 so I’m happy with that. I always knew the short ball was coming, to get out like that was a bit unfortunate.
“Pitch a little bit two-paced. I definitley feel like it is going to be easier to bat tomorrow in the day, a bit more of a graft tomorrow.
“There was no discussion about the declaration beforehand.”
Close of play: New Zealand 37-3 are 288 runs behind.
18th over: New Zealand 37-3 (Conway 17, Wagner 4) Five slips, a leg slip, leg gully, short leg, mid off. Wagner taking the last over from Anderson as is his role. Plugs stoically. One squares him up, wriggling past but he survives. They shake hands at the end of another Bazball special.
James Anderson has a Test wicket for the 21st successive year:
— Will Macpherson (@willis_macp) February 16, 2023
2003
2004
2005
2006
2007
2008
2009
2010
2011
2012
2013
2014
2015
2016
2017
2018
2019
2020
2021
2022
2023
🤯
17th over: New Zealand 37-3 (Conway 17, Wagner 4) Stuart Broad, high-kneed despite the late hour. Conway happy to defend. Stokes, all bristling red beard, folds his arms at slip and grins. One over to g0 – can Conway and Wagner hold on?
Updated
16th over: New Zealand 37-3 (Conway 17, Wagner 4) Anderson sniffs and turns. His first wheels dangerously past Wagner’s bat. A half volley brings a couple. Another beats Conway all ways leaving him waggling his bat helplessly as the ball flies through to the keeper.
15th over: New Zealand 33-3 (Conway 16, Wagner 1) Broad replaces Robinson after five excellent overs. Conway is in no hurry, and they pick a couple.
@tjaldred hey I just saw NZ were 31-3 after 13.3 overs. Spooky, eh? pic.twitter.com/KBS1zvJUWi
— Russell Hope (@SkyRussHope1) February 16, 2023
14th over: New Zealand 31-3 (Conway 15, Wagner 0) New Zealand opt for a nightwatchman, and Wagner – the epitome of pugnaciousness strides out. Immaculate bowling from Anderson. – a freshly starched wicket maiden.
Writes Robert Sim: “Has Jimmy entered his “imperial phase” where he no longer needs to bat?” Indeed.
Updated
WICKET! Nicholls c Crawley b Anderson 4 (New Zealand 31-3)
An end of the day prod, an outside edge, and Crawley hangs on this time - launching himself in front of Joe Root at first slip and scooping the ball off the ground.
13th over: New Zealand 31-2 (Conway 15, Nicholls 4) Conway tucks into a rare loose ball from Robinson, sending him spinning through the covers for four. Five slips and a gully discuss their evening plans.
On TalkSport, they reveal that Crawley has dropped 29 percent of his catches, against an average of 23 per cent. I’m not sure if that is weighted for fielding position though, because slip catchers must drop more than outfielders – no?
And Jeremy Dresner – you just need to retune your radio – it is TalkSport not TMS for this series.
Updated
12th over: New Zealand 27-2 (Conway 11, Nicholls 4) The sweet smell of morning Lynx drifts down the stairs and into the living room. Nicholls is off the mark immediately with a couple off the hips and New Zealand are in trouble already with Williamson back in the hutch.
WICKET! Williamson lbw Anderson 6 (New Zealand 23-2)
Three slips and a gully wait as Anderson smacks into Williamson’s pads. Aleem Dar says no but Anderson and Stokes want the review. It slaps on the knee roll of the front pad – looks out – it is! England clench fists and whoop, it’s the one that they wanted.
11th over: New Zealand 23-1 (Conway 11, Williamson 6) “Find someone to get rid of Smith and Labuschagne and we’re a long way towards winning the Ashes,” says Atherton, as an aside. Half an hour or so left of the day here, and New Zealand tick off another over from Robinson – who may need a rest before the close.
10th over: New Zealand 21-1 (Conway 9, Williamson 6) A DROP! Crawley at second slip somehow lets a prod from Conway fall, snatching too early, to complete a day to forget (we’ve all been there). Anderson, recalled, furies silently to himself as he walks back to his mark.
9th over: New Zealand 20-1 (Conway 9, Williamson 6) Dark shadows follow the players round the field now, as four slips lick their fingers. Survival mode for New Zealand. Robinson queries an lbw off his last ball, but is persuaded otherwise.
8th over: New Zealand 19-1 (Conway 6, Williamson 7) Just one from Broad in full cry.
Today is Stuart Broad’s first overseas Test since Hobart … and there’ll be another robot to contend with in Mt Maunganui… pic.twitter.com/woQzM8mrFb
— Ali Martin (@Cricket_Ali) February 16, 2023
7th over: New Zealand 18-1 (Conway 6, Williamson 7) A flamingo flourish from Conway brings a single, but otherwise it is Robinson the whole way: testing ball after testing ball. Despite the darkness, it must be warm out there – Robinson’s face is shiny with sweat.
”Morning Tanya.” Hello Brian Withington!
”Channelling the Fast Show’s 13th Duke of Wybourne, I wonder if Jimmy has ever before opened the bowling with an hour and a half to play of the third session on day one having not been required to bat? On a Thursday in New Zealand? With a pink ball, under lights. With his reputation? What were they thinking of …”
And taken off after two overs…
6th over: New Zealand 17-1 (Conway 6, Williamson 6) Another testing over from Broad, a couple screaming past Williamson’s bat – who remains serene behind the sandy beard. His first boundary is guided through the slips with velvet hands.
5th over: New Zealand 12-1 (Conway 5, Williamson 2) Stokes switches bowlers early with immediate effect! Robinson strikes with his third ball. A hearty lbw shout against Williamson follows, but England don’t follow up with the third umpire.
WICKET! Latham c Pope b Robinson 1 (New Zealand 10-1)
Tries to turn it around the corner , but just edges the ball into his thigh pad where it balloons up to short leg. Pope props forward and squirrels it away with both hands.
4th over: New Zealand 10-0 (Latham 1, Conway 5) Conway leaves one that almost cuts him in half. Broad nags away. An intriguing battle already.
Trying to work out if we're 70 short or more likely to have NZ 3 down at the close @tjaldred. I've given up trying to make predictions! However, I'll say that this 6-out-all-out batting will only hurt Foakes' place. I'm a biased Surrey fan, but he's got to play. That's a 50 gone.
— Guy Hornsby (@GuyHornsby) February 16, 2023
Yes. In the summer, during their partnership at Old Trafford, Stokes told him, “score where you can, be busy but don’t do anything stupid.” Hope he can carry on batting with those instructions in his head.
3rd over: New Zealand 8-0 (Latham 0, Conway 2) Neat and tidy, neat and tidy, Anderson approaches with beautiful calibration. Four byes as the ball swings past Foakes and down to the rope. Latham beaten on the outside edge. A couple of singles.
“With international cricket behind a pay wall, I don’t get to see as many players as I used to and rely on my imagination to work out what they look like. Unfortunately, I can’t help but imagine Wagner looking like his namesake from the X Factor. I always envisage his long mullet, chest hair and blousey shirts billowing in the breeze when he charges in to bowl. If he’s being especially threatening, I think about Wagbo from Harry Hill’s TV burp instead. Possibly more of a fesshole tweet than a Guardian OBO comment...” Nice detail, Tom V d Gucht.
2nd over: New Zealand 2-0 (Latham 0, Conway 2)An unplayable delivery from Stuart Broad, in traditional knotted headband, angles in and nips past Devon Conway’s bat. Another ripper gets an inside edge onto the pad. And as the lights fully take over from the natural light at the Bay Oval, the black lifts to dark grey in Manchester.
New Zealand innings
1st over: New Zealand 0-0 (Latham 0, Conway 0) It’s Anderson, with a dramatic purple-black skyline as backdrop. And it’s a maiden, in the very first over of the innings. It took New Zealand 46 overs to pull one out of the bag. Both teams have been wearing black armbands in solidarity with those affected by Cyclone Gabrielle.
Belted up? Good, here we go.
While New Zealand pad up, a thoughtful piece on Scott Kuggeleijn printed in the New Zealand Herald back in 2019.
Bazball just can’t help itself. Strutting about like a teenage dream on a Saint Tropez beachfront. New Zealand will have about a hour and half to see out before stumps.
Updated
WICKET! Leach c Latham b Wagner 1 and ENGLAND DECLARE 325-9!
A top-edged pull flies skywards, eventually falling into Latham’s hands at short leg. It threatens to pop out but he grabs it at the second attempt. Stokes promptly declares, because he wants to – as Billie Piper nearly sang.
58th over: England 325-8 (Robinson 15, Leach 1) Five calm dots and a Robinson sink-throwing boundary.
57th over: England 321-8 (Robinson 11, Leach 1) I’m afraid I don’t know if this tail end wobble is part of a grand plan to get a a bowl at New Zealand under lights.
An email arrives from Will Juba, who is remarkably eloquent for a man with an 11-week old baby.
Hi Tanya,
I was recently woken in a very timely manner by my 6 year old son who was in need of some liquid refreshment at 5:15 - awake early enough to watch the final session and with enough time before it started to read the ever-brilliant OBO (thanks as ever to you, Rob and all the other amazing contributors), and even better before my alarm went off so no chance of waking my sleep deprived wife or 11 week old baby.
Anyway, whilst reading the feed under the duvet cover (to reduce light pollution in the room and therefore said chance of waking wife or baby), I was considering Root’s place within Bazball. Firstly, important to state I am a true believer and fully buy in to it. I’d take epic collapses (which I assume will come at some point) for the incredible entertainment currently being served up…the Pakistan series, which came when my daughter was was only a week or two old and therefore perfect middle of the night/early morning viewing, was an absolute privilege to watch.
However, I do worry about Roots place within it. Whilst he did start the bazball era in fine form (the centuries against New Zealand and India were each masterpieces in their own right. My personal fave was the first NZ test for the pure cathartic nature it - I assume - had for Root after such a hard few years as captain. But since then, I get the feeling he’s trying too hard to fit in. The reverse ramp/scoop is an incredible shot but has been his undoing several times in recent test. I know it’s part of the deal (as stated above, I know there will be lows to go with the highs), but Root is just such an unbelievably good player already, who scored at a very decent strike rate as it is - the classic “you look up on he’s 30 from 35 balls” - that I wonder if he needs the extra ‘intent’. It seems to have made him a far more jittery player and he keeps getting in and then getting out.
Granted, that has been a problem for Root in the past with his fifty to one hundred conversion ‘woes’ (ha, to score over 50 nearly every innings) several years back, but more recently he appeared impossible to get out once he’d made 30 and a hundred was absolutely nailed on. Surely we can accommodate one batter (our best batter by the way) who scores at a ‘pedestrian’ strike rate of 75, no? Especially if he scores them 1 in every 3 innings!
Hopefully I’m completely wrong and he gets a century in the second dig and one in the next test, both at a strike rate of 110.
I’m with you – Root can stay just as he is, he needs no refinement. He’s the one player whose batting seems to have been muddled by Bazball – though he’s been nothing but positive about it.
WICKET! Foakes c Williamson b Wagner 38 (England 319-8)
The ball after a swipe over long on for four, Foakes perishes with an out of character fling of the bat which skies up to Williamson who retreats and accepts at cover.
56th over: England 315-7 ( Foakes 34, Robinson 10) Slam-bam, Robinson gobbles up Kuggeleijn, pancaking him repeatedly into the leg side.
WICKET! Broad c Conway b Kuggelejn 2 (England 305-7)
Broad, backing away into the Pacific, swings at a high one, sending it square and to the waiting Conway at deep square leg.
55th over: England 304-6 ( Foakes 33, Broad 2) Got to admit, I thought Brook’s century was in the bag – there is that inevitability to his batting. Unlucky dismissal, but Wagner is just the man you want to force something with sheer willpower Enter Stuart Broad: four leg byes and a dirty swipe for two, fielded well on the rope.
Updated
WICKET! Brook b Wagner 89 (England 298-6)
Unlucky Harry! No fourth century for Brook as he swings at a rapid one from Wagner, misses, gets a thick bottom edge which then cannons off his left ankle into his own stumps.
54th over: England 298-5 (Brook 88, Foakes 30) A camera pans across to the England dressing room where Pope and Paul Collingwood watch with their arms crossed. Kuggeleijn squeezes one past Foakes’ outside edge as he pushes forwards. England playing it calm in the glooming.
53rd over: England 294-5 (Brook 88, Foakes 30) A brute of the ball from Wagner smacks into the side of Brook’s helmet as he takes his eye off the ball. Wagner checks he’s ok as Brooks pulls his helmet off to reveal an army cadet buzz cut. The physios jog out to run through the concussion protocols. All seems well – though there’s a longish break – and Wagner polishes off the over.
52nd over: England 292-5 (Brook 87, Foakes 29) Brook caresses Kuggeleijn away between slip and gully and away to the rope. He milks another four runs from the over, easy does it.
“It seems Neil Wagner has been poor but surely not enough to be substituted out for his brother Paul?” Harsh Eamonn Maloney. Can I blame the early start?
51st over: England 284-5 (Brook 80, Foakes 29) A relative drought since tea – just five runs off the three overs. Wagner does bounding, bouncing Wagner things.
50th over: England 282-5 (Brook 79, Foakes 29) Kuggeleijn resumes. It’s a more menacing over. A bouncer past Brook’s eyebrows ,while Foakes pulls and toe-ends the ball just short of the fielder. And The La’s There she goes echoes over the ground
“Hey Tanya, what’s with the over rate? I know we lost a few minutes for Pope’s helmet shenanigans but 48 overs in two sessions is surely taking the mick… or is this an unintended consequence of Bazball, all these boundaries changing the notion of how many overs can be bowled in a given time? Cheers from sunny Vietnam.” Good point, Peter Gluckstein – add in a bit of added time for Root’s contact lense/sore eye, plus a heavy hand of New Zealand seamers.
49th over: England 280-5 (Brook 79, Foakes 28) The skies above the bay Oval are darkening and threatening. Rain skips around the outskirts as Wagner thunders in. Many are still sitting on the grassy banks, but now the sweatshirts are being pulled on. Nicely done by Wagner, just one from the over.
Final session of the day
The players are out and the ball is almost glowing in Neil Wagner’s hand. Welcome to the witching hour.
Updated
David Gower didn’t make it to the PSL this year, but he’s lobbed up in the Bay Oval in his customary pale blue shirt. “Harry Brook continues to make jaws drop,” he says. “The one he played straight down the ground off Tim Southee… he is fearless. He’s in the form of his life. He’s made the game look very different. The fate of the game and the fate of the day is in his hands. If he gets four centuries in four Tests he’s up there with the greats.”
Alison Mitchell points out that the slow over rate might prevent New Zealand having the new ball under lights tonight.
“England just batted 46 consecutive overs before New Zealand finally restricted them to a maiden over. Does anyone have any idea if this a record from the start of a Test match innings?” I can’t find it with a quick google Dave Brookner, maybe some other OBOers up early can help?
Dinner: England 277-5
48th over: England 277-5 (Brook 79, Foakes 27) And with a couple of singles off Michael Bracewell, it’s time for the players to retire for some supper/dinner/tea. A slow over rate but 145 runs scored in the session at the fair old lick of 5.8, with three wickets lost – Pope, Root and Stokes. Harry Brook doing Harry Brook things, and Ben Foakes cameoing stylishly. Time for a quick brew – I think, though I’m not sure, that this is a 40 minute break.
47th over: England 277-5 (Brook 78, Foakes 26) The dog, who reeks of stagnant puddle water, rubs up next to my dressing gown and sighs. And that’s the first maiden of the day! Tim Southee’s figures now read 13-1-71-2.
46th over: England 277-5 (Brook 78, Foakes 26) Just to say I think my email address is wrong in the furniture, so apologies if I haven’t printed your missive. I will try to change it, but in the meantime do write to me at Tanya.Aldred.freelance@guardian.co.uk. Seven off Michael Bracewell’s over.
Updated
45th over: England 270-5 (Brook 77, Foakes 20) Southee, who always has the look of a celluoid black and war hero now tinted into glorious technicolour, has the misfortune to bowl to Harry Brook His first burns a path across the grass down the ground for four. The next is driven up, up and away for six. Foakess squeaks a third boundary, which flie just short of backward point. Run-tastic!
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44th over: England 254-5-5 (Brook 66, Foakes 15 ) The 250 comes up at a cantering run rate of 5.7. Kuggelejn looks tired as Foakes top edges him to the rope and Brook gobbles up a wide one and burps four.
43rd over: England 244-5-5 (Brook 61, Foakes 10 ) Southee brings himself on and immediately looks classy. He does however bleed 12 runs: three through the covers by Foakes, a stand and deliver bash from Brook and then an unlucky inside edge which nips back off the seam, onto the shoulder of Brook’s back and down to the rope.
42nd over: England 232-5-5 (Brook 52, Foakes 7 ) Kuggelejn bustles in, with angular arms, and hits Foakes high – too high on the pad. The next ball is pushed, beautifully, through cover point for four. All the moving parts are in just the right place.
“Kia ora, Tanya.” Hello Iain McKane!
”Been in NZ since the day before the cyclone struck. Hoping friends in Napier are safe and well and that we can see them next week. No contact possible so far. Waiting for the bus to take us to Hobbiton; due at the Test on Sunday.”
Ah, wishing you a peaceful journey, and hope your friends are waiting for you the other side.
41st over: England 225-5 (Brook 51, Foakes 1 ) The skies are darkening and the floodlights are on as Tickner runs in, small but furry caterpillar above his top lip. Five dots, till Foakes spoils what would have been the first maiden of the day by pulling a bouncer for a single.
Fifty for Harry Brook!
40th over: England 218-5 (Brook 51, Foakes 1 ) And Brook leans back and dollies Kuggeleijn behind to the boundary, staying to admire his handiwork. In five Tests he now has three centuries and two fifties in his cupboard under the stairs.
Updated
39th over: England 209-5 (Brook 45, Foakes 0 ) The change of batter doesn’t bring any respite to the New Zealand bowling figures as Harry Brook muscles two consecutive fours off Tickner.
38th over: England 209-5 (Brook 37, Foakes 0 ) Thanks Rob as ever, and sweet dreams. It may be dark and cold in the UK – though there is a bit of gentle tweeting outside my window – but BazBall is alive and flexing as Stokes stands and slaps the florescent pink ball for four before getting out to a hasty attempted pull.
WICKET! Stokes c Latham b Kuggeleijn (England 209-5)
A cramped, mid-air, ugly swipe at a rising ball to midwicket where Latham clings on – and controversial pick Kuggeleijn has his first Test wicket.
Updated
37th over: England 204-4 (Brook 36, Stokes 15) There are some malevolent clouds in the background, and the floodlights have been switched on as a result. Brook tries to drop his hands on a short ball from Tickner that follows him, hits the top edge and loops high over the slips for four. A single takes him to 36 from 34 balls, and England to 200 from 36.5 overs.
Stokes charges the last ball of the over and slices a cut over the slips for four, prompting to Tickner to shake his hand in a combination of disgust and confusion.
Time for me to hand over to the great Tanya Aldred for the rest of the day’s play; you can email her or tweet @tjaldred. Good morning!
Updated
36th over: England 195-4 (Brook 31, Stokes 11) Scott Kuggeleijn replaces Neil Wagner, who has unprecedented figures of 11-0-70-1. Stokes charges his second ball and misses a slightly absent-minded dab outside off stump. Later in the over he connects with a similar stroke but edges it this far short of slip.
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35th over: England 192-4 (Brook 30, Stokes 10) Brook blazes a back cut for four off Tickner, then repeats the stroke later in the over to move to 30 from 28 balls. He must so intimidating to bowl to, because when he’s in the mood he can pretty much belt any ball to any part of the ground. That’s drinks.
“I don’t often email, but I had half a thought that you were doing the MBM for Liverpool’s Big Cup win in 2005,” says Matthew Williams. “Then I couldn’t remember whether I had some random comment acknowledged in the Olympiakos game or the final… or if it was even you… so I deleted my half-written comment and instead: ‘Whatever. hope you’re well’ ensued.”
Haha. I was sub-editing at the Times that night, having a quiet breakdown. It was Barry who did the MBM. I use ‘hope you’re well’ all the time too. But there has to be a better, or at least more sincere-sounding, alternative.
34th over: England 184-4 (Brook 22, Stokes 10) Brook drives Wagner over mid-off for four more, though he didn’t quite get hold of it. England have definitely had to manufacture more attacking strokes as the pink ball has softened which comes with a degree of risk. Not that Brook cares about risk. I’m not entirely sure he even understands the concept. He has 22 from 22 balls, Stokes 10 from 19.
33rd over: England 175-4 (Brook 15, Stokes 8) Blair Tickner replaces Southee, who bowled a good spell of 4-0-11-1. Stokes gets his first boundary, fiddling the ball deliberately to the third man boundary. Despite losing four wickets, England are still scoring at a healthy 5.3 runs per over.
32nd over: England 171-4 (Brook 15, Stokes 4) Blimey. After five dot balls, and the tantalising prospect of the first maiden of the innings, Brook smears a full delivery through mid-off for four. That was a shot of pure contempt.
In other news, it’s been quite a start to the Ranji Trophy final in India: Bengal are 17 for four against Saurashtra.
31st over: England 166-4 (Brook 11, Stokes 4) Stokes continues to bat sensibly against Southee in particular. Root, incidentally, now has 185 runs at 18.50 in his last seven Tests. Nothing to worry about yet, but maybe he’s having a slight identity crisis.
“It may be a little premature (and at the risk of being a mite Bazunworthy),” says Brian Withington, “but if I were your cat (19th over) I might be tempted to take the precaution of checking my exit routes …”
If he could be bothered, I’m sure he’d be doing just that.
30th over: England 165-4 (Brook 10, Stokes 3) Brook top-edges a cut stroke over the slips for four. This is a better spell from Wagner, who clearly fancies his chances of boring Brook out; he’s angling everything across him, often well wide of off stump.
“The ghost of Wilfred Rhodes just spoke to me,” says Max Bonnell. “He has a message for Joe Root. It goes: ‘It’s a five-day game, lad.’”
And that’s from a man who used to play in Timeless Tests.
29th over: England 161-4 (Brook 6, Stokes 3) A watchful start from Stokes, although he’s only faced seven balls so let’s not hail Bazball 2.0: The New Maturity just yet.
“You speculated that the freaker was probably tackled,” says Adam Roberts. “Stephan Shemilt on BBC: ‘While Joe Root sorted out his eye, a spectator in only his underpants tried his luck with a pitch invasion. Awful idea. In a country full of rugby players he took a monster hit from a security guard. An absolute bone-rattler. I don’t think anyone else will think about going on to the pitch.’”
28th over: England 159-4 (Brook 6, Stokes 1) Harry Brook reaches for a wide, full delivery from Wagner and slams it to the cover boundary. It was in the air for a while but landed short and wide of the fielder in the covers.
Incidentally, that was a terrific catch from Mitchell to dismiss Root. He was on the move, anticipating the reverse scoop, and then swooped to his right to grab it with both hands.
“Today is Joe Root’s 64th Test as ‘not captain’, equalling his count as captain,” says Matthew Williams. “In both sets of 64, he has 14 tons and almost the same conversion rate. His average, however, is some six points higher as ‘not captain’. Whatever. Hope you’re well.”
When did we start using that phrase, ‘hope you’re well’? Even when it’s sincere, it sounds insincere.
WICKET! England 154-4 (Root c Mitchell b Wagner 14)
Joe Root dies by the reverse scoop. He tried to lift Wagner over the slips for the second time in as many overs, but this time it was slightly wider and all Root could do was drag it into the hands of the diving Daryl Mitchell. All of a sudden England. who have a long tail, are in a peedie bit of a bother.
Lightning doesn't strike twice for Joe Root 😔
— Cricket on BT Sport (@btsportcricket) February 16, 2023
And just like that England are 154/4... #NZvENG pic.twitter.com/uQ1gA6tcet
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27th over: England 154-3 (Root 14, Brook 2) “Approaching 11 o’clock here in Cayman,” says Adam Roerts. “Is anyone else finding the bright pink ball in full sun disconcerting? Looks like a plastic bat and ball set for beach cricket.”
Ha, so it does. But are you saying its gimmicky?
WICKET! England 152-3 (Pope c Latham b Southee 42)
Ollie Pope punches his bat in frustration after being suckered into a loose stroke by Tim Southee. He tried to drive a widish tempter and edged low to second slip, where Tom Latham took a good catch.
No half-century for Pope ❌
— Cricket on BT Sport (@btsportcricket) February 16, 2023
Tom Latham with a great catch at second slip to dismiss the Surrey man off a Tim Southee ball... #NZvENG pic.twitter.com/gND6agAb24
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26th over: England 148-2 (Pope 38, Root 14) Wagner switches around the wicket to Pope, woh gives him the charge and hacks a boundary through midwicket. It looks like the pink ball is going soft – aren’t we all - so don’t be surprised if England manufacture a few more strokes like that.
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25th over: England 140-2 (Pope 32, Root 13) The captain Southee returns to the attack after tea, and comes within a whisker of bowling the first maiden of the innings. After five dot balls, Pope muscles a single into the leg side.
24th over: England 139-2 (Pope 31, Root 13) Yeah, Root’s eyes are okay now. Two balls after that longish break in play, he reverse-scoops Wagner over the slips for four.
There’s something in Root’s eye that the physio is struggling to clear. The commentator Stephen Fleming said it was a problem with a contact lens but now he’s not so sure, so maybe Root doesn’t wear them.
Now there’s a freaker on the field, and the lusty roar from the crowd suggests said freaker has just been apprehended in a comic manner.
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23.1 overs: England 135-2 (Pope 31, Root 9) New Zealand have only one slip in place, a reflection of both the pitch and the length that Wagner is likely to bowl. There’s a break in play after one ball because of a problem with one of Root’s contact lenses. I didn’t know he wore them.
The players are back out on the field, and Neil Wagner is going to continue.
“When you say that ‘Gilbert Jessop’s record for the fastest Test hundred (76 balls) is again in jeopardy’, you should probably point out that you mean for England,” says Max Bonnell. “The holder of the actual record for the fastest Test hundred (54 balls) is, of course, attending the game today in his capacity as England coach.”
Teatime reading
A reminder that, in a day/night Test, the first interval is only 20 minutes. I’m reminding myself mainly, as I’d completely forgotten and had been planning to grab 40 winks.
“An incredible knock from Duckett,” says Dean Kinsella. “Completely fearless. Amazing run rate. But strangely, never really got his timing going consistently. Although considering the state of English opening following Cook’s retirement - we’ll absolutely take that.”
I’ll say. We have no idea how blessed we are right now. This is a golden age of English cricket. Might even be the golden age.
Tea
23rd over: England 134-2 (Pope 30, Root 9) The offspinner Michael Bracewell comes on to bowl the last over before lunch. He’ll be glad that Jonny Bairstow, who butchered him in England last summer, isn’t playing in this series.
There’s a bit of turn and bounce, though it’s pretty slow, and Root helps himself to a pair of twos. That’s the end of a typically cagey opening session: 134 runs, two wickets, run-rate 5.83.
The star was Ben Duckett, who made scoring 84 off 68 balls with 14 fours look like the most obvious thing in the world.
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22nd over: England 129-2 (Pope 30, Root 5) Root gets off the mark with a pristine cover drive for four. Wagner bowls another no-ball, then falls over again, then rams a bouncer miles down the leg side. He’s really struggling, and figures of 5-0-35-0 are not unjust.
“Whoops,” says Scott Oliver of Duckett’s dismissal. “Didn’t get into it, did he? Was maybe trying to ‘sit off’ it and slap it square. Looks like he might have got a bit bored. Lost his shape three balls out of four. Meh.”
You’re only as good as your last slap to cover.
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21st over: England 124-2 (Pope 30, Root 0) A stroke of luck for Pope, who tries to turn Tickner to leg and gets a leading edge over the slips for four. After a nervous start, including one over that went for 17, Tickner is settling into his work.
20th over: England 120-2 (Pope 26, Root 0) Joe Root has had a quiet spell, with only one fifty in the last two Test series, and England would love him to hit form before the Ashes. I think they have only one more Test, against Ireland, before they play Australia.
The last time England won the Ashes, in 2015, was largely because of Root’s memorable, tone-setting 134 on the opening day of the series.
19th over: England 117-2 (Pope 23, Root 0) This is only the second time in the Bazball era that England have been put into the bat. The first was against South Africa at Lord’s, when they were skittled in 45 overs and lost by an innings. If they are bowled out in 45 overs today, I’ll eat my cat.
“I’m going through a bout of severe insomnia at the moment,” says Tom King, “and I’m not sure England are really helping. Very inconsiderate. Anyway, I’m struck by just how... old school everything except Duckett and Pope is looking and even sounding.
“The TV commentators (inc Gower) are talking about bowling dry, building pressure, just trying to bowl a maiden, not realising that the skills these players have include not allowing dot balls to happen.
“England are making armchair captaincy a lot more fun than it was under Root - but it’s mostly trying to find answers for the other team now. What is this?”
It’s Bazball, and it’s the reason to cut your hair short and trim your fingernails. (Sorry about the insomnia by the way; I’ve never experienced it but it sounds so grim. I heard an interesting podcast about it a couple of years ago – the guy hosting suffered with serious insomnia for years until he tried Acceptance and Commitment Therapy. Might be worth a listen.)
WICKET! England 117-2 (Duckett c Bracewell b Tickner 84)
Gilbert Jessop’s record is no longer in jeopardy. Ben Duckett has driven straight to cover to give Blair Tickner his first Test wicket. It’s the end of a quietly thrilling innings: 84 from 68 balls with 14 fours.
Duckett falls 16 short of a century 😩
— Cricket on BT Sport (@btsportcricket) February 16, 2023
First Test Match Wicket for Tickner on debut ☝️#NZvENG pic.twitter.com/BRgcsiBzqZ
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18th over: England 115-1 (Duckett 83, Pope 22) Neil Wagner, who bowled two overs for 19 with the new ball (and castled Zak Crawley with a no-ball), returns to the attack in a more familiar role. But he has no rhythm at the moment, and two or three deliveries to Duckett are speared down the leg side.
Duckett has 83 from 64 deliveries, so Gilbert Jessop’s record for the fastest Test hundred (76 balls) is again in jeopardy.
17th over: England 108-1 (Duckett 77, Pope 21) Mount Maunganui has a reputation for being flat and this is no exception. The local commentators think it’s time for Neil Wagner to try a bit of rough stuff and settle into one of his never-ending spells.
16th over: England 106-1 (Duckett 76, Pope 20) Kuggeleijn drops a fraction short – if that – and Duckett slugs a pull through midwicket for four. That brings up England’s hundred at more than a run a ball, and Duckett pulls the next ball to the fence to move to 76 from 58 balls. This is… what is this?
15th over: England 95-1 (Duckett 67, Pope 19) Duckett back cuts Tickner wristily for four, another terrific stroke. Devon Conway charges round the boundary but then seems to dive over the ball.
“Duckett’s compactness and weight transference is really decent (caveat: it might be more challenging for him in Perth or Jo’burg),” writes Scott Oliver, who knows more about these things than most. “But the most impressive shot was a ball slanted across him that he steered away for two or three through gully, which shows he has real ‘feel’ and the ability to make last-nanosecond adjustments (unlike the Harry Hardhands openers Zak, Lees, Sibley, Burns to an extent). Looks good.”
Bounce feels like the biggest concern, doesn’t it, especially with Pat Cummins and Josh Hazlewood to come this summer.
14th over: England 89-1 (Duckett 61, Pope 19) Pope drives Kuggeleijn through mid-on for four, another stylish and emphatic stroke. The ball has stopped swinging and, at this precise moment, batting looks very comfortable.
England are scoring at 6.36 an over, and I don’t know if I mentioned this but it’s the first morning of a Test series.
13th over: England 81-1 (Duckett 59, Pope 13) Tickner changes ends to replace Southee, whose opening spell was better than figures of 6-0-32-1 would suggest.
12th over: England 79-1 (Duckett 58, Pope 13) That’s a pretty good first over from Kuggeleijn. Pope walks down the track to his last ball and nails a straight drive which Kuggeleijn does well to stop in his follow through.
“Good morning from Bangalore, a city that does aggressive, beeping traffic with the same wayward enthusiasm that Zak Crawley flails at an accurate inswinger,” says Harry Lang. “His approach always seems to have a nervous, ‘I’m about to be dropped so I may as well go down fighting’ quality to it. Perhaps a spell as the waterboy wouldn’t be amiss?
“Give him some time to appreciate Duckett’s wonderful, no-nonsense mastery of the opening craft, at least. He might learn something, even of its just the ability to leave the occasional ball...”
11.1 overs: England 78-1 (Duckett 57, Pope 13) The debutant Scott Kuggeleijn comes into the attack. His first ball is a bumper that Pope top-edges onto the helmet, and there’s a drinks break while he is checked for concussion. I think he needs a new helmet as well.
“Looking forward to (hoping for) the boos from the home crowd when Kuggeleijn gets tossed the ball,” wrote Paul Cockburn a few minutes before Kuggeleijn came into the attack. “He’s in miserable form, at a time when women’s cricket is on the up in Aotearoa/NZ… how was he picked? The decision to leave Boult out smacks of sulking because he is winding down his commitments.”
Here’s what the New Zealand coach Gary Stead had to say about it all before the game.
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11th over: England 77-1 (Duckett 57, Pope 12) Southee cleverly angles one across Duckett to beat his attempted drive. Duckett clears his head, tucks a straight one through square leg for four to reach a thrilling half-century from only 36 balls.
It’s been a controlled, businesslike innings, a study in timing and placement rather than power and aggression. He continues that theme by working the next ball through mid-on for his 11th boundary. Eleven boundaries in the first hour of a Test series!
It’s a small sample size, that much is true, but of all the players who have scored at least 500 runs when opening the batting in Test cricket, Duckett’s strike-rate of 92 is comfortably the highest. You won’t/shouldn’t be surprised to see who is second on the list. Clue: it’s not Tim Curtis.
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10th over: England 69-1 (Duckett 49, Pope 12) Jeez, Duckett is batting outrageously well. He times Tickner for four boundaries in five balls – mid-on, extra cover, backward point, extra cover again – to bring up the fifty partnership in 44 balls, and a single off the last ball means he’ll keep the strike.
“A belated happy new year to you and the OBO community,” writes Brian Withington. “Just settling into proceedings at a sedate run a ball, I see. We may not be Bazworthy to quote Chris Lintott, but what a pleasure it is to watch Test cricket in the sunshine, especially after the week NZ (and other parts) has experienced.”
Amen to that, and a happy new year to all as well. To be honest, I’d forgotten this was the first Test cricket of the year.
9th over: England 52-1 (Duckett 32, Pope 12) I was a bit worried about Duckett against the swing of Southee in particular, but so far he has played with class and authority. A pull round the corner for a single brings up the fifty at exactly a run a ball. So I ask again: WHAT HAPPENED TO THIS THING?
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8th over: England 47-1 (Duckett 29, Pope 10) Duckett survives an optimistic LBW shout from Tickner. It was too high, and a no-ball anyway. Duckett slugs a pull for four later in the over, his fifth boundary in only 24 balls on the first morning of a series. What happened to this thing?
“Morning Rob,” says James Walsh. “Back late after attending the London vigil for trans teenager Brianna Ghey. It’s a horrible time to be young and queer in the UK at present, with the full force of the British establishment painting you as public enemy number one. In this darkness, it’s very reassuring to hear the increasingly predictable madness of England Test cricket v3.0 piped from the other side of the world…”
I don’t know whether it’s the healing power of sport, or just a distraction from a world gone wrong, but we need it more than ever.
7th over: England 41-1 (Duckett 24, Pope 10) Duckett continues his extremely impressive start, dismissing a Southee inswinger to the midwicket boundary. When you see somebody open the batting like this, it makes you appreciate Virender Sehwag even more. He was doing this 20 years ago.
Now England dream of a team of Sehwags. Pope moves into double figures by pinging a cover drive for four. Classy stuff.
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6th over: England 30-1 (Duckett 17, Pope 6) Blair Tickner, a tall, right-arm seamer armed with mullet and moustache, replaces Neil Wagner (2-0-19-0). His first ball flies down the leg side but that aside it’s a decent start. Pope is beaten, trying to pull a ball that keeps a bit low, and then flicks a couple through midwicket.
5th over: England 27-1 (Duckett 16, Pope 4) Pope, on the walk, clips Southee stylishly through midwicket for four to get off the mark.
“Zak Crawley,” says Chris Lintott. “Why? Is his perpetual inclusion some sort of test of the Bazball faith? Must we believe in Zak to truly be Bazworthy? Does he have to get out for an uncomfortable ten yet retain his place to encourage the others to be free?”
I’m torn on whether Crawley should be in the team, but often people talk about him as if he averages, well, 10.00. His career average is 28, which isn’t great but is comparable to all the other openers, and his Baz average is 27. It’s a unique case, though, because he has been given more chances than all the others, and I’m really not sure what point I’m trying to make.
4th over: England 23-1 (Duckett 16, Pope 0) Wagner overpitches to Duckett, who returns it with interest through mid-on. That’s Duckett’s third boundary, and it was Wagner’s third no-ball as well. He’s not bowling well, and a scruffy over ends with him spearing one down the leg side.
3rd over: England 18-1 (Duckett 12, Pope 0) Ollie Pope offers no stroke to his first ball, an inswinger that doesn’t miss off stump by all that much. A fair enough leave, but a tight one.
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WICKET! England 18-1 (Crawley c Bracewell b Southee 4)
Zak Crawley is put out of his misery. Not for the first time, Tim Southee was just too good for him there. Crawley was beaten by the previous ball, trying to drive, and attempted to negate the swing by walking down the track.
It didn’t work: he edged low to third slip, just like in the opening over, but this time Bracewell took a smart two-handed catch.
Third time unlucky ❌
— Cricket on BT Sport (@btsportcricket) February 16, 2023
Crawley is finally dismissed for 4 after Captain Southee finds the edge again... #NZvENG pic.twitter.com/vyZlQZBi6b
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2nd over: England 17-0 (Crawley 4, Duckett 11) Wagner hardly ever takes the new ball – I think this is only the fifth time in 115 innings – but if he can bowl deliveries like that to the right-hander he’ll be a threat.
Swing or no swing, England are on the attack. Crawley inside-edges wide of leg stump for a single, then Duckett hits consecutive boundaries – an efficent tuck off the pads followed by a hearty slap clout through the covers. The next ball is cut for three more. Duckett has 11 from four balls, in swinging conditions, on the first morning of a Test series.
Crawley is bowled by a no-ball! It was Wagner’s first delivery of the game, a classic inswinger to the right-hander, but replays showed he had overstepped.
1st over: England 3-0 (Crawley 3, Duckett 0) Crawley is beaten, driving at a Southee outswinger, and then clips a single through mid-on. An interesting start, with some encouraging movement for New Zealand.
“Evenin’,” writes my old Guardian colleague Paul Cockburn, who took the inspired decision to move to New Zealand back in the late 2000s. “There’s pessimism in these parts that the Black Caps are off their peak - certainly results have been poor. I’ll be at the Basin expecting a fireworks display.
“Right now, though, I think we are grateful (and amazed) that there can be cricket anywhere on the North Island after the last week. Looking forward to this first hour or so.”
0.2 overs: England 2-0 (Crawley 2, Duckett 0) Crawley is dropped second ball! He walked down the track to Southee – second ball of the series - and edged an outswinger to the right of third slip, where the diving Bracewell put down a sharp chance.
There’s a brief delay because of a problem with the sightscreen, which is currently black rather than white.
The players are ready for action. The New Zealand captain Tim Southee has a pink ball in his hand, and Zak Crawley in his sights.
“Morning Rob,” writes Showbizguru. “My two openers, Gin and Tonic, had a good evening session. But I’ve brought in a nightwatchman, Glen Morangie, to see me through to lunch.”
If you’re bringing in a nightwatchman for the morning session, I’d suggest these particular openers have done an exceedingly good job.
Okay, I’m off to get a coffee, so I’ll see you in a bit for the first session. If you’re going to stay up all night, it might as well be to watch England bat. One way or another, it’ll not be dull.
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The teams
New Zealand Latham, Conway, Williamson, Nicholls, Mitchell, Blundell (wk), Bracewell, Kuggeleijn, Southee (c), Wagner, Tickner.
England Crawley, Duckett, Pope, Root, Brook, Stokes (c), Foakes (wk), Robinson, Leach, Broad, Anderson.
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New Zealand win the toss and bowl
Tim Southee says it looks like a pretty good pitch, “as it always is here”, so I guess he wants to get ahead of the game while there is a bit of juice in the pitch. He confirms that Scott Kuggeleijn and Blair Tickner, a couple of experienced seamers, will make their Test debuts.
Ben Stokes doesn’t seem too perturbed. “It was good to lose the toss because I didn’t know what to do!”
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Bucket list department
📍 Bay Oval, Mount Maunganui
— England's Barmy Army (@TheBarmyArmy) February 16, 2023
A proper cricket ground this 😍#NZvENG pic.twitter.com/JO9mfDHsgz
England named their team a couple of days ago – of course they did – with two changes from the final Test in Pakistan. Jimmy Anderson and Stuart Broad replace Mark Wood and Rehan Ahmed.
England Crawley, Duckett, Pope, Root, Brook, Stokes (c), Foakes (wk), Robinson, Leach, Broad, Anderson.
Today is Stuart Broad’s first overseas Test since Hobart … and there’ll be another robot to contend with in Mt Maunganui… pic.twitter.com/woQzM8mrFb
— Ali Martin (@Cricket_Ali) February 16, 2023
The New Zealand XI will be confirmed any minute now. We know they are without the injured Kyle Jamieson, a huge blow, and that their bowling attack is likely to include a couple of debutants.
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This is a really nice read on how a boy called Brendon became a visionary called Baz.
Mount Maunganui avoided the worst of Cyclone Gabrielle, and it looks like the game will start on time (1am GMT, 2pm local). Thunderstorms are forecast for later today, at least according to Jackie Aprile, so it might be a stop-start day.
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Preamble
Hello and welcome to live coverage of the first Test between New Zealand and England in Mount Maunganui. Yep, Bazball is coming home. The latest assignment for England’s Test cricket revolutionaries is a two-match series in New Zealand, the birthplace of their coach Brendon McCullum and captain Ben Stokes. Their first challenge is to navigate the unique rhythms of a day-night Test, and to get blood (aka 20 wickets) out of a pink ball.
We don’t yet know whether Bazball is a moment in time or something more epochal, so for now we might as well just enjoy the unprecedented sensation of England being the most exciting Test team in the world.
Like the white-ball revolution of 2015, it all started against New Zealand. England won 3-0 last summer, though New Zealand were competitive in all three games before being smashed to smithereens in the final act. They are still a fine side, even if they haven’t always shown it since winning the World Test Championship.
They are without players for all kinds of reasons – retirement, injury, franchise contacts, parenthood, something else I’ve forgotten – and their team for this game will include only five or six of the XI that beat India in that WTC final 18 months ago. They also have a newish captain in Tim Southee.
New Zealand’s Test record since that glorious day in Hampshire is P11 W2 D4 L5, although most of those games were overseas. They haven’t lost a series at home since 2016-17, so we shouldn’t underestimate the size of the task ahead for England.
Even so, they start the series as favourites. England’s epiphanistas have won nine Tests out of ten under the new-age captaincy of Stokes, their best run since the giddy year of 2004. Then, as now, all roads led to one thing: the Ashes.
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