Thank you for joining me. Let’s do it all again soon!
Sam Dalling was at St Mary’s tonight. Here is his report.
Full time: Sunderland 1-2 Sheffield United. A big win for the Blades.
“BHA have a realistic chance Champion’s league footer next season with, I think, Newcastle the biggest threat. I think they’d fare better in it than Spurs who are a shambles right now. Fingers crossed!” From a confident Dean Kinsella.
In case you were wondering … Liverpool are out.
Full time: Napoli 3-0 Frankfurt (agg 5-0)
Napoli are through!
Here is how the Premier League looks.
| Pos | Team | P | GD | Pts |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| 1 | Arsenal | 27 | 37 | 66 |
| 2 | Man City | 27 | 42 | 61 |
| 3 | Man Utd | 26 | 6 | 50 |
| 4 | Tottenham Hotspur | 27 | 12 | 48 |
| 5 | Newcastle | 25 | 19 | 44 |
| 6 | Liverpool | 26 | 18 | 42 |
| 7 | Brighton | 25 | 15 | 42 |
| 8 | Brentford | 26 | 9 | 41 |
| 9 | Fulham | 27 | 1 | 39 |
| 10 | Chelsea | 26 | 1 | 37 |
| 11 | Aston Villa | 26 | -7 | 35 |
| 12 | Crystal Palace | 27 | -13 | 27 |
| 13 | Wolverhampton | 27 | -17 | 27 |
| 14 | Nottm Forest | 26 | -26 | 26 |
| 15 | Everton | 27 | -18 | 25 |
| 16 | Leicester | 26 | -9 | 24 |
| 17 | West Ham | 26 | -10 | 24 |
| 18 | AFC Bournemouth | 26 | -26 | 24 |
| 19 | Leeds | 26 | -11 | 23 |
| 20 | Southampton | 27 | -23 | 22 |
Championship scores
Blackburn 2-1 Reading
Cardiff 1-1 West Brom
Huddersfield 1-1 Norwich
Hull 1-3 Burnley
Luton 1-0 Bristol City
“Many young boys have train obsessions,” says Mary Waltz. “Movement, pleasant click clack sounds, Trains are awesome. Of all the terrible things that a youngster can be focused on, Trains are great, It isn’t a Baby Shark song that can send any adult into madness on the 500th time they insist on hearing it, count yourself lucky.”
My daughter will be pleased.
What does the future hold for Crystal Palace? The Eagles have not won in 14 and are three points above the relegation zone. A precarious time.
Updated
GOAL! Real Madrid 1-0 Liverpool (agg 6-2) (Benzema, 78): All done.
Ed Aarons was at the Amex for Brighton’s latest win.
Here is Suzanne Wrack’s report of Tottenham 1-0 Leicester.
GOALS (In Scotland): “Jack Murray broke the deadlock for the league leaders in the Highlands at the start of the second half, and Josh Peters has since added another. Joyland for Buckie. Misery for Brora.”
Courtesy of Simon McMahon.
A good night for Brighton.
Atfer four years and seven matches, Brighton finally end their winless run against Crystal Palace thanks to Solly March's first-half goal. Worrying times for Patrick Vieira
— Ed Aarons (@ed_aarons) March 15, 2023
Full time! Southampton 0-2 Brentford
Saints remain bottom. They had chances but could not find the back of the net and were finished off late on.
Full time! Brighton 1-0 Crystal Palace
March took his chance, while Palace missed a few chances of their own. The Eagles are in trouble, while Brighton are eyeing Europe still.
GOAL! Southampton 0-2 Brentford (Wissa, 90+2)
Done and dusted. A long ball is flicked on by Toney to Wissa, who does the rest.
Updated
Championship goals! Blackburn are back in the lead against Reading through Hedges and Tella has completed his Burnley hat-trick at Hull.
GOAL! Napoli 3-0 Frankfurt (agg 5-0) (Zielinski pen)
And another.
Updated
GOAL! Sunderland 1-2 Sheffield United (Doyle, 61)
Another Manchester City loanee on the scoresheet. The midfielder curls in a free kick, no one seems to touch it and the ball lands in the bottom corner.
Updated
A big night for Napoli.
Napoli have never played in a European Cup quarter final. Not with Diego Maradona, not when they were piling up 91 points in Serie A under Sarri, never.
— Nicky Bandini (@NickyBandini) March 15, 2023
And now they're making it look *so* easy.
Southampton 0-1 Brentford: Jansson and Mee clash heads, resulting in a busy few moments for the physios.
GOAL! Huddersfield 1-1 Norwich (Hanley og, 65): Some mild comedy as Waghorn lobs Gunn only to see the ball bounce off the post but it ricochets into the net off the retreating Hanley.
GOAL! Napoli 2-0 Frankfurt (agg 4-0) (Osimhen, 53)
Another for Osimhen and that really is game over for Frankfurt.
Updated
Championship goals: Reading level at Blackburn; Burnley double the lead at Hull.
Southampton 0-1 Brentford: Norgaard takes down Lavia to stop an attack. VAR takes look to see if it is worthy of a red.
Southampton 0-1 Brentford: Bree lumps in a cross for Onuachu to attack, but the striker goes straight into Raya rather than connecting with the ball.
“It’s hard not to warm to Napoli this season,” says Kari Tulinius. “They play exciting football, seem like decent sorts, and they’re Maradona’s old club. Also, sadly, it seems likely that richer clubs will pick the team apart, so this might the one year they can win the Champions League. Surely the romantic’s choice, and they’re good enough to pull it off.”
Full time: Tottenham Women 1-0 Leicester Women
Jepson gets a win in her first game in caretaker charge thanks to England’s goal.
Updated
Southampton 0-1 Brentford: Walker-Peters is off injured. Bree, Walcott and Lavia are all on for the Saints.
Updated
Brighton 1-0 Palace: Whitworth makes a fine save down to his right to palm away Mac Allister’s header.
Colum Fordham emails: “After a day of Eintracht fans running riot in the centre of Naples (there were police helicopters buzzing around Naples at lunchtime on my way back from work) it’s extremely satisfying to see Osimhen leap high above the German defenders to head home and give Napoli the lead. Kavaraskelia has been giving Eintracht Frankfurt a headache with his sumptuous dribbling.”
Here is the McAtee goal for eligible viewers.
"THAT IS SUPERB!" 😮💨
— Sky Sports Football (@SkyFootball) March 15, 2023
Manchester City loanee James McAtee levels it up just before the break 🔥 pic.twitter.com/XcyWtIqsTW
Brighton 1-0 Palace: Some good derby vibes.
De Zerbi shown a yellow card for questioning the booking of Caicedo
— Ed Aarons (@ed_aarons) March 15, 2023
Half time in the Bernabeu where it is 0-0 on the night. Liverpool need a miracle now …
GOAL! Napoli 1-0 Frankfurt (agg 3-0) (Osimhen, 45+2)
A chipped cross finds an unmarked Osimhen inside the box to head into the top corner. This tie is over.
Updated
GOAL! Sunderland 1-1 Sheffield United (McAtee, 45+1): Baldock slips a pass inside to McAtee, he takes a touch and passes it perfectly into the corner. You can tell he is on loan from Man City.
Updated
Brighton 1-0 Palace: And we’re back!
Simon McMahon: “Approaching half time at Dudgeon Park, Brora and, as predicted, the teams with 174 league goals between them this season are drawing 0-0.”
Brighton 1-0 Palace: A stoppage in play.
The lights very briefly went out at the Amex Stadium just now. Players nowon edge of pitch as they try to sort out an issue with electrics
— Ed Aarons (@ed_aarons) March 15, 2023
Napoli 0-0 Frankfurt (agg 2-0): Lobotka is down after being caught by Sow. Frankfurt are giving their all but not really troubling Napoli.
Southampton 0-1 Brentford: Walker-Peters gets down the wing and pulls the ball back to Adams, he beats Raya but Hickey blocks on the line.
Dan Christmas emails: “If Pep was going to watch a Julia Roberts film with Erling Haaland he’d probably pick Hook - ‘just wait until about an hour in.’
“I went on IMDb and that’s the best I could come up with. Julia Roberts hasn’t been in as many blockbusters as you’d think.”
Lazy Julia.
Brighton 1-0 Palace: Doucoure is taken off because he is a walking red card. Eze on.
GOAL! Hull 0-1 Burnley (Tella, 43): The winger latches onto a ball over the top, cuts inside a defend and finds the corner. The Clarets are one step closer to promotion.
GOAL! Sunderland 1-0 Sheffield United (Michut, 30): The young Frenchman finds space on the edge of the box and flashes a shot across the goalkeeper into the corner for his first goal in red and white.
Updated
Sunderland 0-0 Sheffield United: Hume is very lucky after a late lunge is punished only with a yellow card. It was over the top, too.
More on the violence in Naples.
GOAL! Tottenham Women 1-0 Leicester Women (England, 65)
A big goal in the relegation battle. That’s why they paid good money for England.
Updated
@Will_Unwin Surely Guardiola’s favourite Julia Roberts film will be ‘Pep-a-Porter’ but he probably hates ‘Flatbackfourliners’.
— Mister Tagomi (@MisterTagomi) March 15, 2023
Tottenham Women 0-0 Leicester Women: Mace hits the bar for the Foxes to liven up a poor quality affair.
Napoli 0-0 Frankfurt (agg 2-0): The Germans are putting the effort in. They love putting in a tackle, even if it is a touch late. No major concerns for the hosts.
Half time: Southampton 0-1 Brentford
Toney’s goal makes the difference.
Half time: Brighton 1-0 Palace
Doucoure avoids a second yellow despite committing a very bookable offence with a tackle. Vieira needs to get him off at half time.
GOAL! Huddersfield 0-1 Norwich: The hosts are wearing yellow to raise money for charity, making things a touch confusing. Sara is less confused and volleys home a the back post.
Updated
Napoli 0-0 Frankfurt (agg 2-0): Kvaratskhelia gets his first sight of goal but sends the ball well wide.
Brighton 1-0 Palace: Zaha and Veltman collide, resulting in the latter getting a bloody nose.
Brighton 1-0 Palace: The visitors really do struggle in front of goal.
Edouard through on goal but somehow manages to let it through his legs and not control it. What a chance!
— Ed Aarons (@ed_aarons) March 15, 2023
GOAL! Southampton 0-1 Brentford (Toney, 33)
Brentford have been creating the better chances and get their reward. Norgaard flicks the ball on from an Mbeumo cross and Toney is there to tap home.
Updated
Brighton 1-0 Palace: Olise has a chance from a free-kick but it is deflected over by a head in the wall.
Brighton 1-0 Palace: YELLOW! Doucoure goes into the book for taking down Veltman.
“Perfectly normal Will,” says Matthew Newmark about my parenting. “My now three year old was exactly the same. Now she’s moved onto songs about potties and vids of guinea pigs on roller coasters…”
I know what I am doing at half time.
Southampton 0-0 Brentford: Schade gets away from Walker-Peters and pulls the ball back for Mbeumo but the forward takes a touch and the defenders surround him.
March 15: “First MBM goal and it’s today’s date! And it’s my birthday! Who’d have believed it?”
Happy birthday Tim Hughes.
A couple of early goals in the Championship. Ben Brereton Diaz has put Blackburn 1-0 up against Reading, while Luton lead Bristol City through Carlton Morris.
Half time – Tottenham 0-0 Leicester: All quiet in the WSL.
Southampton 0-0 Brentford: Is it a cross or shot? Who knows? Either way, Ward-Prowse’s effort skips off the surface and forces Raya to react.
“Should have stayed at Brighton,” says Jeff Sax. To be fair, he has won the last three and is the quarter finals of the Champions League.
GOAL! Brighton 1-0 Crystal Palace (March, 15)
Palace are made to pay for failing to take their chances. March goes through and slots the ball beyond Whitworth.
Updated
Brighton 0-0 Palace: Another shot from Palace! They are playing some slick stuff, especially considering their recent exploits in attack. Edouard forces a good save from Steele.
Southampton 0-0 Brentford: Janelt sends a ball over the top for Schade but he heads it just wide.
Brighton 0-0 Palace: Olise latches onto a through ball and goes one-on-one with Steele but the goalkeeper does well to stop him.
Brighton 0-0 Palace: Clyne whips in a cross for Edouard to attack but the striker flicks his head wide.
Brighton 0-0 Palace: Whitworth comes out of goal and heads the ball 30 yards away from the net. A decisive bit of goalkeeping. Palace have already had their first shot on target in four matches. Fair play.
“Seeing as it’s Clockwatch, we can have the Champions League and the Scottish Highland League, right?” Of course we can, Simon McMahon. “Tonight sees Brora Rangers welcome Buckie Thistle in a crucial match. Brora are 13 points behind leaders Buckie, but will of course cut that gap to 10 with a win tonight, and they have three games in hand. Brora have scored 94 goals in 24 matches, and Buckie have 80 in 27. A goalless draw very much on the cards then I reckon ..?”
...
“It’s a tricky one for Brentford,” says Bill Preston. “Southampton are sure to get a stomp and save their season via thrilling goal line heroics.
“Also, trains through stations sounds preferable to videos of teenagers playing Minecraft, screaming.”
Huge day indeed.
Patrick Vieira on 19-year-old Joe Whitworth, who will make his debut for Palace against Brighton tonight after VIcente Guaita's injury. "He has been a ball boy at the stadium and is a true Palace fan. It is a big day for him."
— Ed Aarons (@ed_aarons) March 15, 2023
Kick off
The two Premier League matches are under way.
I am currently working next to my two-year-old who is happily watching trains going through stations on YouTube. Is this normal?
Antony Train suggests re Pep and Roberts: “Until recently, I would have said Oceans 11. Clooney taking on the False 9 position, but now it is obviously, Erling Brockovich?”
Starting lineups: Napoli v Frankfurt
Napoli: Meret, Di Lorenzo, Rrahmani, Kim, Rui, Zambo Anguissa, Lobotka, Zielinski, Politano, Osimhen, Kvaratskhelia.
Eintracht Frankfurt: Trapp, Silva Melo, Ndicka, Lenz, Buta, Rode, Sow, Knauff, Götze, Kamada, Borré.
Kristof Künssler-McIlwain suggests Guardiola’s favourite Roberts film is Ocean’s Eleven.
Just in case you were wondering who Joe Whitworth looks like.
Updated
What do we think is Guardiola’s favourite Julia Roberts movie?
Notting Hill? Pretty Woman?
If you are a bit more mainstream, you can join Scott Murray for Real Madrid v Liverpool.
A big moment for Whitworth.
19 - At 19 years and 15 days, Crystal Palace's Joe Whitworth is the youngest goalkeeper to appear in a Premier League game since Ben Alnwick in December 2005 for Sunderland vs Spurs (18 years, 336 days). Baptism.
— OptaJoe (@OptaJoe) March 15, 2023
Over it in Naples, it is a touch lively due to clashes between supporters and police. A lot of Frankfurt fans have travelled to the city despite being officially banned from the stadium.
The big news down at the Amex is that 19-year-old goalkeeper Joe Whitworth is making his Crystal Palace debut because of injuries to Vicente Guaita and Sam Johnstone.
Starting lineups: Southampton v Brentford
Southampton: Bazunu, Walker-Peters, Bednarek, Bella-Kotchap, Diallo, Ward-Prowse, Perraud, Alcaraz, Elyounoussi, Adams, Sulemana.
Subs: Caballero, A.Armstrong, Onuachu, Bree, S.Armstrong, Mara, Salisu, Walcott, Lavia.
Brentford: Raya, Hickey, Henry, Pinnock, Mee, Norgaard, Jensen, Schade, Janelt, Mbeumo, Toney.
Subs: Cox, Dasilva, Wissa, Zanka, Ghoddos, Onyeka, Jansson, Damsgaard, Baptiste.
Starting lineups: Brighton v Palace
Brighton: Steele, Veltman, Colwill, Dunk, Estupinan, Gross, Caicedo, March, Mac Allister, Mitoma, Ferguson.
Subs: Sanchez, Webster, Sarmiento, Enciso, Undav, Gilmour, Ferguson, Van Hecke, Buonanotte.
Crystal Palace: Whitworth, Clyne, Andersen, Guehi, Mitchell, Lokonga, Doucoure, Olise, Edouard, Schlupp, Zaha.
Subs: Goodman, Ward, Milivojevic, Tomkins, Ayew, Eze, Mateta, Richards, Ahamada.
Welcome
What an intriguing night of action we have to look forward. There is the small matter of a Champions League last-16 game. Admittedly, Napoli are 2-0 up from the first leg in Frankfurt but there is still hope for the Germans. Not much, but hope nonetheless.
Back in Blighty there are two Premier League matches. Most notably, it is that well-known derby of Brighton v Crystal Palace. We could spend all day discussing the merits of said fixture being described as a rivalry but, ultimately, the fans would tell you it is absolutely MASSIVE. Brighton are aiming for Europe, while Palace are fully immersed in the relegation battle after a poor run of form.
Speaking of battling for survival, the Premier League’s bottom club Southampton welcome Brentford to St Mary’s in the infamous red stripe derby. Due to how close things are at the foot of the table, a win for Saints would lift them out of the drop zone and up to 16th, which is a handsome prospect. Brentford arrive off the back of a dispiriting loss to Everton at the weekend and will want to be far better tonight.
There is also the start of the post-Rehanne Skinner era for Tottenham in the WSL against Leicester and Championship games aplenty.
Here’s to a fun evening!
Napoli v Eintracht Frankfurt – 8pm (GMT)
Brighton v Palace – 7.30pm
Southampton v Brentford – 7.30pm
