When you're expecting a baby, it's common to throw a baby shower ahead of the little one's birth in order to celebrate the impending arrival. A baby shower usually sees loved ones give gifts to the expectant parents that will help them with their new baby, and it may even be the time when the couple decides to share the name they've picked out.
However, one woman has been left fuming after her mother-in-law went behind her back to throw her a baby shower that included everything she had explicitly said she didn't want - and then even failed to invite her to it.
The mum explained she's currently expecting her sixth child and her first with her partner, and while she initially didn't want a baby shower at all, she was convinced to have one after her partner's mum insisted she would plan it.
Things seemed to be going smoothly when the woman told her partner's mum what she wanted, and she felt reassured as it seemed the other woman understood the brief when it came to the theme of the party and the plan for the registry.
Among her requests, the mum said she wanted to be told when the invites were ready to send out, as there were certain people she didn't want to invite, as well as people close to her that she did want to attend.
But her hopes were shattered when her partner's mum instead posted the invitation on Facebook without telling her - and not only did she not invite any of the mum's friends, but she didn't even send the mum herself an invite.
In a post on Reddit, the mum wrote: "I also asked her to communicate with me before sending out any invites so I could get her a list of people I'd like to come … you know, considering I'M THE MOTHER OF THE BABY. She agreed and said she would let me know and get contact info when the time came.
"She then informs me she will be sending out a SECOND INVITATION in a couple of weeks, and will get my list of invites then. The baby shower is in 3.5 weeks. Apparently, she already sent out an invitation on Facebook and hadn't even let me know until after it was sent. I then find out she sent an invitation to my partner on his Facebook, but not to me on mine. After finding this out I asked her to send me the Facebook invite so I could see it and all I got were screenshots, not even a link."
And when she finally got to look at the Facebook invitation, she was left horrified - as she realised her partner's mum had put her baby's "full name" at the top of the event, despite her explicitly telling her she didn't want to share the name until after her little one was born.
To make matters worse, the woman had also ignored her wishes for a woodland-themed event and had also invited all of the people the mum had stated she didn't want to be there.
She added: "Tell me why she picked the ugliest fairy image to exist to be the header photo, as well as put our daughter's full name on it. (I haven't even decided on her last name and she listed it as my partner's even though we are not married).
"I don't know what to do because if I mention how I’m feeling to my partner he will not see my perspective and just defend his mother doing something kind for us. I feel like this has been made to be all about him and them and I'm being treated like a mere vessel. I just want to go no contact and ignore her from this point, but I love my partner and don't want to upset him."
Commenters on the post were firmly on the mum's side, with many of them encouraging her not to attend the shower, or get her partner's mum to cancel it.
One person said: "You need your boyfriend to man up and tell his mum to fix the invite. He also should be able to invite you to the group or you can have him post an announcement with your preferences in the group from his Facebook."
While another added: "Tell her to cancel it. Plan and simple. It isn't the shower you wanted. It's the shower she wants. Or since your partner loves mummy so much, send him. You're setting yourself on fire to keep other people warm. Stop."
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