A woman who has suffered multiple miscarriages wanted to wait until her second trimester to announce her pregnancy and made it very clear to her mother-in-law that she didn't want her sharing anything via social media until she gave her the okay. Although she has a decent enough relationship with her mother-in-law, they have 'butted heads' over the years, and she hasn't always been comfortable with her habit of sharing personal information over Facebook.
She and her partner visited her in-laws the other week to announce they were 11 weeks pregnant. Her in-laws were 'thrilled' and her mother-in-law happily agreed not to post anything on Facebook. Unfortunately, this wasn't the end of the matter.
Taking to Reddit, where she goes by the username u/Gullible_Tough, the mum-to-be wrote: "We decided to wait one more week to share online and have a little photoshoot planned for this weekend.
"Fast forward to a few days ago and I sign onto Facebook to see my mother-in-law post 'I’m going to be a grandma'. I was furious. I call my significant other and they’re also furious and very busy at work (they can’t be on the phone all day). They take a second and call my mother-in-law and father-in-law but no one answers."
She then sent her mother-in-law a text asking her to take down the post, stating that they would have liked to make the announcement first. Her mother-in-law responded to say she'd thought they'd already announced it and claimed she was 'searching for a way to delete it'.
The expectant mum clarified they hadn't yet announced their news and urged her to take her post down 'as soon as possible'. She replied confirming it had been taken down, telling her to 'stop worrying so much'.
At this point, the pregnant woman lost patience, recalling in her post: "I said, 'Do not tell me not the worry. The least you can do is apologize. We asked you not to post it, and you did without letting us know. It doesn’t matter if it was a misunderstanding or not. I know mistakes happen but you trying to tell me not to worry is completely and utterly beside the point'."
Her mother-in-law told her she was being 'harsh', and later told her significant other that she'd been 'downright rude, over the top'. Now she's wondering whether she might have gone overboard, and reached out to fellow Reddit users for their thoughts.
One person advised: "Hopefully, this isn't a sign of what's to come but if she's announcing your pregnancy before you, she's likely to post many pics without approval too.
"You'll need to establish firm boundaries before the baby is born and she needs to earn your trust back before she's allowed to have any info you're not ready to share with everyone."
Another commented: "That is such a violation of trust! She is so wrapped up in her own world, I'm so sorry you had to deal with that. I hope this pregnancy isn't too stressful and that everything works out well."
Do you have a pregnancy announcement story to share? Email us at julia.banim@reachplc.com
