When you're trying for a baby with your partner and you finally get pregnant, it can feel like the happiest day of your life. It often brings a strong couple even closer together, knowing that you're going to welcome your very own bundle of joy into the world in less than nine months.
But what would you do if your partner of six years, husband of three, asked you for a paternity test out of the blue? The likelihood is that you'd be shocked and horrified by the request, and you may even laugh, thinking that he was making a "bad joke."
That's exactly what happened to one distraught woman who took to Reddit's 'True Off My Chest' forum to explain that her and her husband have never been "that compatible in the bedroom department" - but this doesn't make her a cheat.
She explained: "After deciding we were ready for a baby we've tried for almost a year and I am finally expecting. I'm currently in my fourth month. However yesterday my husband asked me if we could do a paternity test, completely out of the blue.
"At first, I thought I heard him wrong, and when he doubled down I laughed because I thought he was making a bad joke. But no, he was actually dead serious. As soon as I realised that I immediately felt sick to my stomach. I asked him why he wanted the test and he says he just wants to make sure the baby is his.
"I asked him if he's suspecting me of cheating, and he said no. I pointed out that I work full time and spend every single free minute I have with him, so when would I even find the time to cheat, even if I wanted to, which I don't? He got angry at me and said I have no idea what it's like to be the man and have no control over this whole pregnancy situation and that he doesn't want to be a doormat stuck raising a 'cuckoo's egg' (his words).
"He claimed he has a right to know for certain. I admittedly snapped at him that he DOES know for certain because I told him so, and I would know who the father of my child is, right?! He smugly said that's what any cheater would say and that he deserves proof so he can have peace of mind."
She explained that in her country, paternity tests have to "be consented to by both parents or be court ordered", so she said if he was going to try and get one, to also file for divorce as she was "done" with his behaviour.
She continued: "He got all huffy and claimed I wouldn't get this upset about the situation unless I had something to hide. At this point, I've had it and said: 'Well, if after six years of patience and loyalty despite the fact that you suck in bed THIS is the thanks I get then the only thing I have been hiding is my disappointment in you.'
"He stared blankly at me for a moment and then he started crying. I left him standing, threw a bag of essentials together, and left for my parent's house.
"I feel like my whole world has collapsed. My mum is trying to play mediator and has spoken to him in the meantime - she told me that he is very hurt by my comment and he wants me to apologise for that at the very least as a way of meeting him in the middle.
"On the one side, I know what I said was said out of spite and was way below the belt, but on the other hand, I feel absolutely justified to have finally said it out loud after tiptoeing around his feelings for years while neglecting my own needs in this relationship. I'm more and more sure I don't even want to go back. I'd rather be a single mum than coddling his insecurities one day longer."
In the comments, people shared their similar experiences with men, with many telling her to leave.
One wrote: "I was married 18 years to a man like that. He was very very 'vanilla'. Out of the blue, he started accusing me of cheating. Turns out he was cheating. I left and it was the best decision for me."
Someone else fumed: "Yup. This happened to me too. My (now ex) husband insisted that the only reason I could want a divorce was because I was cheating.
"News flash - I wasn't. He just sucked in bed. Sucked as a co-parent. Sucked as a partner. Sucked as a friend. But...he WAS cheating."
Another raged: "This is my son's biological dad in a nutshell. He was constantly accusing me of cheating, and at last count, he had cheated on me with nine different women."
What would you do in this situation? Let us know in the comments.
