Two Scots mums mourning the loss of their teenage sons have united in grief to skydive in memory of their children.
Carmen Duff, 39, and Kerry Clunie, 42, both from Fife, have raised nearly £3000 for a mental health cause after they collectively jumped 20,000ft from the clouds for charity on Saturday, August 13. The two tragically lost their children in the space of just two years.
Carmen's son, Robbie McArthur, was 18 when he sadly took his own life on May 6, 2019. Twenty-seven months later, Kerry's son, Rogan, tragically died by suicide in August 2021 - also aged just 18.
As the pair bravely leaped from the plane and into the skies, they clutched pictures of their boys close to their hearts and shouted: 'This one is for you!'
The mums describe their shared loss as 'the worst thing' that any parent can go through. They chose to skydive in memory of their boys as a reason to 'keep going' and to be pushed out of their comfort zones.
Carmen told the Record: "I was really emotional and had to hold my tears in. I had a photo of Robbie tucked into my chest and I kept it close to me whenever I got nervous. I was terrified but I am glad to have done it for Robbie.
"I'd like to think that he is proud of me. Hopefully, he was there watching over me. It has been really hard without him."
Kerry added: "We chose the skydive because we wanted to be a bit daring. We needed something that would push us out of our comfort zone. It was an experience, to say the least.
"When I jumped from the plane I could just see him shouting 'go Kezza' as that's what he would call me if he was winding me up. When we got to ground level, we stood there cuddling and crying.
"Although there was a lot of excitement and jokes around the skydive, we were hit with a stark reminder of why we were there. We all took a shot of parma violet for Robbie and Rogan."
Living only seven miles apart in Kirkcaldy and Lochgelly, both mums have told how life had been going seemingly well for their boys prior to their sudden deaths. Robbie had bagged an apprenticeship as a vehicle technician at Volkswagen while Rogan was studying environmental engineering at college.
Carmen said: "Robbie was a massive success in everything that he did. He was doing really well for himself with his apprenticeship.
"He went out one bank holiday weekend and that is when we sadly lost him. It was really unexpected. Robbie was my best pal.
"He was more than just my son, he was my firstborn. I had him when I was only 18 so I was pretty young myself.
"I still think he's going to come home from work, just for a wee split second, then it hits me and I remember he isn't. Every day is a rollercoaster without him, it is a struggle."
Kerry told how Rogan had been making plans for his future just days before he unexpectedly died.
She said: "He was making plans in the August with his friends and doing things that a normal teenager would be doing, but then we lost him really suddenly. He had the whole world ahead of him, he was so smart.
"In the aftermath, we're still not okay. We're struggling to live without him, it turns your whole world on its axis."
In the difficult months following Robbie's death, Carmen and Robbie's grandad, Donald, set up the Robbie McArthur Foundation in his name and memory to help others. The mums have decided all funds will go towards the foundation to help other people in their local area.
Carmen added: "In the early days, we started doing things to give us a focus on something and to give us a purpose to get us up every day. Robbie's brother and sister were my main focus but we ended up setting up a foundation in his name and in his memory to help us but to help other people who are struggling.
"The skydive has been part of that and all the funds will go towards that to help others in our area."
Rogan's sister, Jasmin - who also took part in the skydive - said the foundation helped her to cope with the loss of her little brother in the early days.
The 21-year-old said: "The fundraiser has given us something to focus on right now but the going to the group gave us a reason to get out of the house in the beginning. It's just having that somebody that you can relate to.
"Not a lot of people speak about their loss by suicide - not a lot of people know how to. Doing these fundraisers allows us to help others but it also lets us keep Rogan and Robbie's memories alive."
Robbie and Rogan have been remembered as selfless young men who would would 'go out of their way' for anybody they met.
Carmen said: "Robbie was a really bubbly character and had a massive smile for everyone. He would have done anything for anyone in the drop of a hat. I fight my own battles now because I've lost him, nothing has been the same since he left and nothing will be the same again."
Jasmin said: "Rogan was so cheeky and always cracking a joke at one of our expenses. He had so many pals, too.
"He was completely selfless and would go out of his way for anybody. If he could do something to help somebody, he would do it, he was like the glue between his friends."
Both families have stressed that they want to urge anybody who may be struggling with their mental health to reach out and ask for help.
Carmen said: "We know it is really hard for people - especially men - to open up about how they are feeling. We just want people to speak out before the point where they feel that they have lost themselves and there is no going back."
Kerry added: "We want people to reach out and speak to somebody. It will be a hard journey but people left behind would much rather hear your issues than attend your funeral. If you're worried about a family member, ask them questions and talk to them about it.
"Don't just assume that their problems will get better, even when they say they are, dig deep. If you reach out to somebody and they don't take you seriously, reach out to somebody else. Keep talking."
The Robbie McArthur Foundation holds a weekly drop-in club every Wednesday at 6.30pm at Lochgelly Golf Club, which is open to all members of the public.
Donate to the mums' fundraiser here.
Help and support is available at:
- Samaritans - 116 123 (24hr) Calls are free & confidential. Email jo@samaritans.org For people experiencing distress or despair, including those that could lead to suicide.
- Breathing Space 0800 83 85 87 (6pm - 2am daily and 24 hours weekends) A free and confidential phone-line service for any individual, who is experiencing low mood or depression.
- For help and support for your mental health, speak to your GP or if out of hours, call NHS 24 on 111
- ChildLine 0800 1111 - a free 24-hour helpline for children and young people in the UK.
- HopeLine UK (0800 24 20 24) a free service for childen & young people under the age of 35 who are experiencing thoughts of suicide & for anyone concerned that a young person could be thinking about suicide.
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