A mum has revealed her genius hack to get fussy kids to eat their peas - by making them laugh. Alley Dezenhouse Kelner, 36, says her trick “transformed” her tot’s fussy eating habits at just 18 months - and it still works for her now at eight years old.
Alley came up with the method, which she called “Freeze Peas”, with her husband, Billy, 36, after their daughter, eight, was reluctant to eat her peas. To try and get her to eat them, Billy, who works on the financial side of Alley's business Magnificent Minds, would try and make her laugh by freezing on the spot whenever she ate a forkful.
Finding it “hysterical” their daughter felt encouraged to keep eating her peas. In order to “keep her on her toes” Billy only froze during random forkfuls of peas and eventually “the plate was clean” for the first time.
Alley, a child mental health therapist, said: “It’s all about keeping her guessing. She’s never going to know which bite will be the bite.
“It’s a silly game that we play and it works. But I still want my daughter to eat intuitively and feel in charge of what she’s eating, when she’s eating it.
"We’re not forcing her to eat the peas - she’s choosing to. It’s about a variable ratio of reinforcement - i.e. when my child is having peas, not every bite will make my husband freeze.”
As a therapist specialising in neurodivergent children, Alley has learned several tips for encouraging positive behaviour - including tidying up, not hurting other children and behaving at the dinner table. She uses differential reinforcement - which means motivating someone in a range of different ways - including making them laugh, or giving them a treat for good behaviour. Despite the “silly” nature of the ‘Freeze Peas’ game, Alley, from Toronto, Canada, has faced some “ridiculous” backlash from people on social media.
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She said: “She’s eight-years-old now, obviously we’ve been playing Freeze Peas since she was 18 months. But people worry for her future.
“They think she’ll be 28, on a first dinner date with a guy, and she’ll expect him to freeze with every other bite. It’s ridiculous! Of course she knows it’s not real. I think we really underestimate the intellect of young children.”
Alley’s top tips for managing children’s behaviour:
- Reinforcement always increases a behaviour, so good reinforcements - like offering your child a biscuit for tidying their room - encourage good behaviour.
- Positive opposites are great for stopping bad behaviour in its tracks - like asking a child to “please walk” if you see them running in a hallway. This is “more productive” than just telling them off as some kids won’t understand why they’re being told to stop.
- Reinforcement is the exact same for neurodivergent children as it is for neurotypical - you just might need to be a little more direct.
