Child-free weddings are not uncommon. While some people couldn't dream of celebrating their big day without all of their nearest and dearest around them, others prefer it if their younger relations to stay at home. After all, crying babies and screaming children can be annoying at the best of times, let alone when you're trying to listen to a couple exchange their vows.
However, it is less common for couples to insist on such a rule and make no exceptions if they themselves have children. Well, one mum has been left in a horrible situation after her fiancé insisted her daughters could not come to their wedding for this very reason.
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Despite sharing a close relationship with the children, who call him dad, the man believes they should stay at home, according to a Reddit post written by his bride-to-be.
Posting to the website's "Am I the A*****e" forum, the mum sought advice on how best to respond to the shocking request. And after hearing her side of the story in full, many suggested the woman should reconsider her marriage.
In her post, the mum claimed: "Before I (f35) met my fiancè Robin (m37) I was a single mom of two girls (currently 12 & 14). My daughters are my priority, they have been since the day they were born and I do all I could to play both parents to them to be able to fully give them a stable life.
"Robin then came around and he absolutely adored them the day he met them. He even refers to each one of them as his 'left eye, right eye' that's how precious they are to him.
"We're getting married soon. He wants a child free wedding and promised to make all of his family commit to this rule. however, when I took my daughters dress shopping and came home to show him the dresses they picked for the wedding. he went quiet then pulled inti (sic) the kitchen to have a talk."
She continued: "I noticed something was wrong so I asked and he told me that my daughters are also included in the 'no children' rule. I told him those are my kids and they're mom is getting married of course they will want to attend.
"He said that if his family finds out there's gonna be a problem and they'll accuse him of being a doormat and playing favorites between them and me. I said that was unacceptable and that no matter what the rules are, my daughters are always an exception, they're my daughters!"
"He insisted that they 'stay home' with a babysitter but I refused. He said it's just one day and I was making it a big deal, I replied that it's not just any day but the day of their mom and dad getting married. He got angry and started pacing around saying he was trying his best to stay calm and collected but I was making it really hard for him.
"I told him this was my final answer and he blew up and said that I have no respect for him and his family to act this incosiderate (sic) towards them. I asked him if his family are protesting about my kids' presence just because I'm a single mom. he went quiet and then said I knew how much he loves them and that I was trying to flip the argument on him when it was me who is refusing to cooperate."
Her post concluded: "He has gone quiet not only towards me but grew distant from the girls as well. They are now wondering why their dad (they call him dad) isn't speaking to them. Honestly I'm not sure if taking this stance is the best decision seeing how he reacted.
"AITA for choosing this as my hill to die on?"
Well, people were quick to console the concerned parent, whose side they took, and several also suggested she reconsider her relationship.
One person wrote: "Forget every detail of this disagreement, none of it matters. When you don’t comply with your fiancé’s wishes, he is willing to hurt your kids. I beg you to take some time to consider what that will mean for your daughters in the future."
A second added: "Frankly, this feels off to me to the point that I recommend you cancel the wedding and seek couple's counseling."
Another agreed: "NTA & I hope you end that engagement." They added: " He's SHOWING you that your daughters are not important."
The bride-to-be replied: "Honestly. I keep asking myself what is this about. I keep thinking about his words then see how he's behaving and I'm left feeling so confused."
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