A mum is annoyed by her 27-year-old niece's demands for designer Christmas presents.
The mum is the youngest of her siblings "by some way" and has lots of nieces and nephews who are much older than her child, who is seven. The mum and her siblings all agreed to "just buy for the kids" this year, but her sister insisted that must include her 27-year-old daughter.
The niece then supplied a Christmas list for her relatives to choose from - packed with designer perfume and expensive cosmetics the mum "could never afford to buy" for herself, as well as pricey clothing and more. The mum was left feeling irate by this, as her niece "earns more" than she does and also "owns her own home courtesy of her parents".
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Despite the mum's love and affection for her family, she is still feeling frustrated that the cheapest item she could find on her niece's Christmas list cost £37. Things got even more irritating when her sister, the 27-year-old's mother, demanded the presents be posted quickly as they're planning to travel abroad for Christmas.
Taking to Mumsnet's popular Am I Being Unreasonable (AIBU) thread with a post titled ' Buying for the 'kids' when they're in fact grabby adults!! ', she explained the situation and then continued: "Oldest sister has just asked if I can hurry up and send her daughter's present to her before she leaves to travel abroad for Christmas this time next week. Am I wrong in thinking this is taking the p*** a bit now?
"She'll get it when I send them all, I'll make sure they get them before Xmas. And if, in the worst are scenario, it gets lost in the post or something and she gets her present when she comes back to the UK because she's going abroad a week before Xmas, it's not the end of the world because SHE'S A B****Y ADULT and can deal with it?"
The mum then said she was "particularly up to the eyeballs this year with work, the way the school term falls and some health stuff" so wondered if she was being "a bit unreasonable".
She added: "I don't begrudge my niece a gift but am irked that it has to be so fancy and her having it is SO urgent, like she's 5 and her Christmas depends on it. For info my sibling sent my DS7 [dear son, 7] a gift, which I'll need to wrap. It's a book."
The mum's post was met with heaps of responses from fellow Mumsnet users, keen to share their thoughts. One said: "After this Christmas, say that from now on you'll only be buying for children 18 and under and likewise don't expect anyone to buy you presents either. Your adult niece has presumably had twenty odd years worth of gifts from you so she isn't being left out, she's just aged out. Just be assertive."
A second said: "Set an age limit next year, under 18s only. I would have told eldest niece that the items on her list were out of budget, and asked for other more budget friendly ideas, if none were forthcoming it would be a token gift of chocolate/smellies".
Another Mumsnet user commented: "We stopped when they turned 18. Sister and niece sound grabby. As someone else said she's probably had plenty of gifts over the years, when is it supposed to stop? I think it's different if you are very close and have only a couple and plenty of money. This year, send equivalent gifts to what your DC [dear child] has received from your sibling. In hindsight you should have created a list for DC with things of equal value to DN [dear niece]."
Another said: "Bonkers. Send grabby niece a book via Amazon prime. Unwrapped. And vow not to buy for her at all next year. She's being left out. She's not a child who has had her years of toys at xmas!! Match what your sister has spent on your kids this year and match her effort too. Next year maybe just skip gifting completely? I don't think all this extended gift giving is necessary tbh [to be honest]."
In a follow up comment, the mum confirmed she would stop buying for her niece, no matter what her sister insists: "I've had some kind of epiphany that I've basically been a doormat to my sister for forever. Not any more! Can't get out of this Christmas nonsense now but I won't be doing it again and will be calling out her utter nonsense from now on.
"It won't go down well. Luckily she's far enough away that her disapproval will make bugger all difference to me!! Dn [dear niece] and I used to be really close. She's just disdainful now. She's an adult so I shall have to treat her like one from now on."
At the time of writing, 97% of Mumsnet users voted the mum was not being unreasonable to feel "irked" by the situation.
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