A 48-year-old mum ended up falling in love with a man 23 younger than her - after forgetting to change her age limit settings on Tinder. Rachel Caudele was recently divorced when she met 25-year-old Alex Michael on the dating app in 2020.
The pair immediately hit it off despite the significant age difference, and after chatting online for a bit, Rachel flew to New York to meet Alex for the first time in person. They had an ''instant connection'', with couple making it official not long after and moving in together.
However, their relationship hasn't been without its challenges. Five months into sharing a home together, Rachel found out Alex was messaging other women and nearly called it quits, Wales Online reports.
But the couple have since worked through their issues and are now "rock solid" - adding that "age is just a number".
Rachel, a sign language director at an international school, who has two sons aged 23 and 19, said: "We had an instant connection, but there was something more than that. It's like an energy. I can tell when he has a thought, and he can do the same with me, it's really strange."
Alex, a website creator for pharmaceutical companies, said: "I definitely knew that it was different and unique with Rachel because she's so much like me, she's awesome. It's been the best decision I've ever made."
Rachel was fresh from a recent divorce in September 2020 when she signed up for a dating app. She said: "I was in a new place and wanted to try something different. I was enjoying my freedom, and my friend convinced me to go on Tinder. I was very skeptical, and taken aback by the messages I received.
''I was getting unsolicited pictures, and I didn't like it. Alex messaged me, and I just kept coming back to his picture. It sounds really cliché, but I thought he had kind eyes. We started chatting and the age question came up.
''When he told me he was 23 I was like 'woah, that's way too young, nothing is going to come of this'. He liked to talk on the phone, and his voice was very sexy and appealing to me. We had great conversations and lots in common. He's literally like the male form of me."
Alex, a website creator for pharmaceutical companies, added: "I happened to change my age range on Tinder, and matched with her. I thought, oh my god, she looks great for her age, she doesn't look like she's in her forties at all. She was super cool and genuine, she's more than just a pretty face."
Rachel then flew out to New York, US, when she was on a break from her teaching job, where she met up with Alex for the first time. Alex borrowed his parents' car to take Rachel to dinner.
"I had to go home afterwards because I wasn't allowed to have the car overnight," Alex said. "We hit it off really well, but I remember saying to her 'have a nice life' because she was located in Texas and I was in New York, so I didn't think anything would come of it."
However, the pair travelled together to Miami and Austin in October and November 2020, where they both realised their feelings for each other were strong. They officially began dating in December 2020, with Alex calling Rachel ''his girl''.
"In January 2021, I went to Houston where Rachel was living," Alex said. "I had a remote job and she asked if I wanted to live with her. I got a suitcase and never went back. We lived together for that whole year."
Five months into living together, Rachel discovered Alex had been messaging other women on social media. "He had never experienced those sorts of boundaries in a relationship before, and I felt heartbroken and betrayed," Rachel said.
"He has issues with anxiety, and female attention made him feel better. I wanted to leave the relationship, but I'm not a person who gives up easily."
Alex added: "It was very wrong of me, what I did. I grew up with a lot of insecurities, and I didn't get a lot of attention when I was younger. I wanted to experience that. I never had the intention of hooking up, I just wanted the attention."
Alex has since deleted his Instagram and Facebook and has worked hard to progress in his relationship with Rachel. "It helped me to come full circle and realise what the right thing to do is in relationships," he said.
The pair have also faced hard times due to backlash from their TikTok account, and disapproval from some friends and relatives. "We started sharing our story on social media in February 2021," Alex said. "We based it around our age gap to start with, which was a niche we had that got us the following, but now we've progressed to more dating-style content."
The couple's first video, 'tips for dating a cougar', blew up online and was on track to receive one million views. "I was in the gym and students from the school I taught at were coming up to me, so I told Alex to take the video down straight away," Rachel said.
Rachel's eldest son found out about the relationship because a friend sent him the TikTok. "It was hard at first," Rachel said. "But he respects it now, he just wants me to be happy. Oddly we have a lot of age gap relationships in my family, and they're respectful of Alex and I."
Alex's family on the other hand, disapprove of the couple and won't support them. Rachel said: ''It's very hard for him, they think it's strange and that I'm grooming him, or some sort of a sexual predator. We're literally a normal couple with a large age gap."
In January this year, the couple decided to take a break and see other people, but this only lasted for two weeks. "Sometimes you need to step away to realise you truly want something," Alex said.
Despite their different ages, the couple don't identify with terms such as 'sugar baby' or 'cougar'. The couple say that pursuing a relationship like theirs is not easy, but their advice to others who might be in their situation is to "do what makes you happy".
Rachel said: "I don't judge people, I just want people to know that's not our thing. I would ask, 'is it worth it to you?' It's not going to be the easiest thing, things outside the relationship will impact you like people thinking it's weird or strange.
"Age should not be the main factor, if you are both consenting adults with a connection - do it. If you find something so real like what we have, you should do it."
Alex said: "You shouldn't let other people affect the decisions in your life. You only get one life after all."
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