For most, traveling to other countries is nice, and it’s even more exciting if you’re flying to different continents. However, that’s not the case for everyone – some people would rather stay at home.
Today’s story covers how a teenager refused to travel with her family to Europe, as she was too anxious about it and France, in particular, made her feel “depressed”.
More Info: Mumsnet
Some teenage behavior is easily reduced to hormones and rebellious phases, but that’s not always the case
A woman approached the Mumsnet online community to see if she was being unreasonable for being upset with her daughter
The mom already spent money and booked a trip to France, as they were going to visit their extended family
However, the 17-year-old teenager refused to go, saying that France made her feel “depressed”
The mom didn’t think that the daughter was feeling that bad, but after a conversation, she realized that the teen was truly feeling down and needed support instead of being pushed to go
Recently a woman approached the Mumsnet online community to ask if she was unreasonable for being upset with her daughter. The 17-year-old teenager ruined her mom’s travel plans, as they were supposed to go on a trip to France and visit their relatives.
The family hardly ever goes to France, the exception being last year, when they traveled there for the first time in a decade. The teen didn’t enjoy their trip, though, saying that she didn’t feel confident speaking French and felt depressed there. You’d think visiting your family in a foreign country would make a person excited, but that wasn’t the case here.
Still, the mom persisted. The OP (Original Poster) managed to talk the daughter into going this year again, but she quickly changed her mind. Even though a 17-year-old teen is almost an adult, the woman didn’t feel at peace with leaving the daughter alone, as she hasn’t “matured” enough.
Since the trip was already booked, the mom started getting annoyed by the daughter’s reluctance to go and took the dilemma to the internet. However, she soon found out more reasons why her daughter didn’t want to go, and it’s way more complex than you might suspect.
After a long conversation with the teen, the mom found out that the daughter was feeling way more down than she initially thought. The adolescent struggles with self-esteem, and her habits of sleeping in late and staying in front of the computer well into the night haven’t helped either. Her social anxiety is really bad too, to the point where she can’t help herself and go, even though she knows it’s selfish.
Naturally, this shed a different light on mom’s perspective. She didn’t think that her daughter was in such a bad headspace. Therefore, she decided to not go on the trip herself, as she couldn’t even think of leaving the teen alone. It’s a good example of how deeming a teenager “entitled” or “stubborn” is not always the way to go.
Sure, these qualities can be true for some of them, but every person’s case is unique. It turned out that the young woman needed support and help from the family, and the reluctance to go wasn’t just an act of rebellion.
Experiencing low self-esteem during adolescence is not uncommon. It’s always been the case, but in today’s world, it’s worse than ever before. As social media continues to expand and even take over some people’s entire identities, the damage to not yet fully developed children and teenagers increases.
Media powerhouses, such as Instagram and TikTok, create an environment where sharing anything just shy of perfection is an anomaly. Easily impressionable teenagers and even adults might internalize the luxurious and perfect-looking lifestyles they see on the internet, then feel immense depression and dissatisfaction if their lives and looks are not the same. And in real life, the life that’s rarely shown on social media, things are rarely perfect.
It goes without saying that most of the carefully tailored social media posts of influencers and even the people you know are smoke and mirrors. However, for a person who grew up in a heavily digitalized world, this might not be an axiom. The potential impact of social media overconsumption is vast, and it should not be ignored.
A 2021 study covered in Psychology Today highlights that 3 out of 5 girls in the US feel “hopeless” or “persistently sad”, largely due to the internet. Consequently, it was found that cutting down on social media positively improved the respondent’s self-esteem and general psychological well-being.
It’s probably not a long shot to claim that the 17-year-old’s psychological wellness was affected by social media consumption as well, although it’s not realistic to claim that it’s the root cause. The mom updated her post with more context after all, and that her daughter struggled with her body image. In the end, the daughter went to see a doctor who recommended her to see a psychiatrist as she was severely anxious and depressed.
As a compromise, the mom and daughter agreed that they would travel to France for now, and the teen would be able to lock herself in a bedroom if she didn’t feel like going out.
What do you think about today’s story? Do you think the teen should’ve just gone on the trip instead of saying how she felt? Let us know in the comments below.
Netizens say that the mom is already making too many excuses and that the teen is spoilt and selfish
