My wife, Mary Mitchell, who has died aged 70 after a stroke, was a housewife who had a great capacity to overcome the troubles life threw at her.
She was born in Leeds, the first child of Sylvia (nee Binney) and Bob Pickering, who were both architects, and was brought up in Preston, Lancashire. After attending Penwortham girls’ grammar school, she lived and worked in Swansea for a short time as a laboratory assistant before parting with her first husband and returning to Preston, where she met my friend, Geoffrey Pape. They married in 1978.
Mary had continued to work in laboratory sciences, but she and Geoffrey were intent on raising a family and that became her focus. Four children, Catherine, Jennifer, Anthony and Richard, followed. In 1994 Geoffrey died of a heart attack; and when four years later I returned to Preston after the breakdown of my own marriage, Mary and the children welcomed me into their family. We married in 2000.
In 2006 Mary’s youngest son, Richard, was involved in a traffic accident that resulted in traumatic head injury. The years that followed saw his mental health decline and finally resulted in a term in special hospital. During this period Mary showed unconditional love for Richard and was uncompromising in her drive to support and protect him. Owing to her efforts he is now in a special rehab unit and has never been more content.
In 2010 I suffered a massive abdominal bleed, and again Mary was faced with potential tragedy. But her unbelievable resolve saw both of us through to my eventual recovery. Her optimism and positivity were awesome to behold and utterly infectious.
All these events are not, in themselves, unusual; individual traumas happen to everybody. But what was so special about Mary was her ability to cope with adversity in a way that made the outcome seem inevitably rosy. None of us knew how she managed this – it was mysterious and magical, and an inspiration to everyone who knew her.
She is survived by me, her four children, three grandchildren and her siblings Bruce and Rose.
