If I were to make a list like “10 things you definitely shouldn’t do when meeting your new partner’s family for the first time,” it would definitely include the point “Go to a family gathering, and then criticize local customs heavily, citing your family’s experiences.”
But I did not compile and publish such a list – and thereby didn’t warn the guy from our today’s story. As a result, he was kicked out of a family cookout and his likely in-laws may have decided that he’s just an entitled jerk. Damn it, if this dude’s relationship doesn’t work out, I’ll feel guilty…
More info: Reddit
The author of the post recently hosted a family cookout with around 30 guests
Image credits: Luis Quintero (not the actual photo)
Among the guests was the man’s sister who brought her new boyfriend for the first time
Image credits: Silly_Emu9279
The food was nice but not that pricey – just hot dogs, hamburgers, chips and beer but no one complained. Well, no one but this new boyfriend…
Image credits: David Kouakou (not the actual photo)
Image credits: Silly_Emu9279
The guy slated the host for not throwing such an extravagant party, and bragged over his family’s lavish cookout traditions
Image credits: Anete Lusina (not the actual photo)
Image credits: Silly_Emu9279
The host, however, just told the guy he could go straight to his family’s posh BBQ party – so he left with the author’s sister
Now let’s get a bit serious. The author of our story today, the user u/Silly_Emu9279, recently hosted a family cookout, to which his sister brought her new boyfriend, “Steve” (hmm, the second Steve in just two days… Gentlemen, if your name is Steve too, please refrain from any rash actions in the next couple of days! Thank you!) So, for Steve, this was the first meeting with the woman’s fam.
The food at this cookout was hearty, but not at all lavish: hot dogs and hamburgers. The author’s sister brought one bag of store-brand potato chips, and Steve helped himself to beer. And everything was fine until Steve, when the hot dogs were gone, asked with a puzzled look: “Is that all?”
The original poster explained to the probable BIL that the burgers were coming now, and then yes, that was really all. And here the fountain of Steve’s eloquence literally erupted – the guy said that in his family they make BBQ, chicken, steaks, shrimp and many other tasty and expensive things for any given cookout.
The author listened carefully to this stream of bragging – and then calmly declared that Steve could go to this lavish cookout with his loved relatives right now, grabbing the sister’s unopened bag of potato chips and the sister as well. The guy fumed but left with his girlfriend, and after they left, the cookout was just fine.
However, soon after this, the OP’s mother called the author and attacked him with criticism and demands to immediately apologize to Steve, from which we can conclude that the sister has already complained to her about her bro’s behavior. On the other hand, the OP’s wife fully supported him, arguing that the guest behaved inappropriately and deserved to be kicked out.
As for the other guests present at this scene, opinions were very divided. Some thought that Steve behaved provocatively by criticizing the host. Others were pretty much convinced that the original poster definitely overreacted…
Image credits: RDNE Stock project (not the actual photo)
“Well, I can completely understand this man who didn’t want to tolerate criticism at home. Moreover, all the other guests were completely satisfied, as far as I get it,” says Irina Matveeva, a psychologist and certified NLP specialist, whom Bored Panda asked for a comment over this situation. “The host simply stood his ground, and, in my opinion, there was nothing overly reprehensible in his words or actions.”
“Perhaps he shouldn’t have outright kicked out the guest and his sister. Maybe he should have just said something like “you don’t like it – do it a better way!” and given the guest the opportunity to apologize. Who knows, maybe the man just had a little too much beer at the time of this conversation. However, even in this case this is not an excuse for such behavior,” Irina summarizes.
And what about the people in the comments to the original post? Well, the commenters didn’t mince words about Steve, and on the contrary, they fully supported the author. “How refreshing it is to find someone with a healthy spine here,” one person wrote. “Tell your mom you have nothing to apologize for.” “That guy was rude as hell,” another commenter added.
By the way, some commenters noted that Steve had an excellent opportunity to prove himself – it would have been enough to bring some pricey food with him, which he, in his own words, was used to at his family gatherings. “If they wanted it to be more than that, maybe they should have brought more than a bag of chips,” someone noted with a bit of perfectly seasoned sarcasm.
Well, guests at various family holidays often try, for some unknown reason, to become the center of everyone’s attention – as was the case, for example, in this story of ours about a random woman at a no less random wedding. And if you also remember any similar cases, please feel free to tell your own tale in the comments below this post.