In a move that is sure to enrage fans of, well, mostly Notts County FC, the ubiquitous proprietors and co-chairmen of the club's arch rivals Wrexham have inevitably muscled in on the British Christmas Advert market. And they are going big. This is not just a Christmas ad...
This first, modest little spot, released this morning, is the first in M&S Food's new 'six-part blockbuster ad series', helmed for the third year running by Dawn French's bob-wearing Christmas fairy, and introducing Right and Left, a pair of mittens owned by a young girl named Lily (I assume eventually we will meet Lily. So far we are mostly taking a tour through M&S food, not something I would do in a pair of polyester gloves but the Christmas ad logic is not to be questioned) voiced by Hollywood superstar Ryan Reynolds and the other one (Rob McElhenney).
"The dynamics between the glamorous and fearless Fairy and the downcast and lonely mittens will pull on the heart strings of the nation," they promise. They do not. They are mittens. Even if they do have cute little reindeer faces and cute little reindeer antlers and cute little button eyes, and the voices of two increasingly popular adopted-Welsh celebrities.
As is the wont of M&S Xmas ads, we linger over glops of brandy cream, glittering foil-wrapped chocolates (used, ingeniously, to play a game of Connect Four, which is one way to really ramp up the competition on the day) and set fire to the obligatory Christmas pudding (again, not something I would do within ten feet of a pair of polyester gloves). Fairy magics up "a feast fit for a mitten" – I'm not going to lie, I'm really struggling with this, please don't handle your Christmas food with your gloves on, it's disgusting – and Right and Left do a cute little high five.
You may be wondering what on earth is the connection between Wrexham and M&S, well let me tell you: the brand opened its first store in the town in 1936, and this year kicks off, no, sorry, I can't say it, initiates its first local football club partnership with Wrexham AFC (it is, you will remember, the partner to the four British national teams. You can even buy the suits).
Anyone who has watched the fascinating Disney+ series Welcome to Wrexham, following the fortunes of the club since its purchase by its Hollywood owners, will have a sense of how much it will mean to the town, which has struggled economically for years, for a new M&S Food store to open there, on December 1, bringing direct employment and contract work for local bakeries.
It's a cute little ad, given a sprinkling of stardust by Reynolds and McElhenney. I look forward to meeting Lily; I hope she doesn't eat with her mittens on. But I suspect that, Wrexham having triumphed over their rivals in the National League, in homes across Nottingham, for the duration of the Christmas period, a lot of swearing and "turn it off!" will be heard.
