We all know that person — and if we don’t, probably are that person — who is, for want of a better term, a bit of a fussy eater.
By fussy, I don’t mean difficult dietary requirements — that’s another article for another day. Fussy eaters are those who want unchallenging food they’ll recognise from a menu that doesn’t need explaining. It will need to be something simple and straightforward and ideally something that’s been had before, or a safe variation thereof. If you’re having beers, make theirs a lager. They want the curries to be mild, any sauces set on the side, all fishes to be un-fishy tasting and all garnishes gone. The suggestion of anywhere too fancy likewise tends to elicate a grimace.
More often than not, these people aren’t food-lovers, yet they do occasionally have to dine with people who are — which is where this list comes in, with a rundown of good restaurants and pubs where both the foodies and the fussy eaters will delight. After all, eating simply is no sin — it’s just choosing somewhere mediocre that is.
Kitty Fishers
At first glance, Kitty Fishers looks fancy with a capital F. There are velvet seats and towering candle sticks, and lights suspended in glass vases. What’s more, the restaurant is in London’s most upmarket postcode, W1. Don’t be deceived: Mayfair may be home to fancy people, but these can be the fussiest — and Kitty Fishers’ enduring success rests on catering for them. Fortunately for the food-lovers, it rests on delighting us, too, so whilst there is carrot soup and a pork chop on the menu, there are also sightly more complex dishes such as grilled lemon sole with grapefruit, kohlrabi and brown butter. Some ingredients may need a short explanation — Graceburn is a feta-style cows cheese, XO sauce is like the lovechild between soy sauce and Worcestershire, and so on — but most speak for themselves, like the crispy potatoes that shatter into golden shards upon contact. I’ve witnessed these potatoes inducing tears of joy in some — though that’s difficult to confirm, as the prices are also eye-watering. Worth it though.
10 Shepherd Market, W1J 7QF, kittyfishers.com
Fischer’s
To me, so far, Corbin & King’s acclaimed group of restaurants retain much of their quality despite both Chris Corin and Jeremy King themselves contentiously being ousted earlier this year. Fussy eaters don’t need to know that, though, they just need to know this is a beautifully designed, Viennese-inspired restaurant in Marylebone serving dishes that seem straight out of the Sound of Music: schnitzels, noodles, sausages and chicken soup. Come for the bircher muesli, stay for the hot chocolate, linger for a lunch of smoked salmon, horseradish and Nordic bread. The service is second to none — King’s instinct for hospitality was infectious, and it lingers on in the staff that remain — and the prices, whilst occasionally punchy, aren’t absurd.
50 Marylebone High Street, W1U 5HN, fischers.co.uk
Café Cecilia
Café Cecilia may be the food community’s latest darling, but it is also a damn good restaurant serving excellent steak and chips. The two aren’t always mutually exclusive; on the contrary, some of the most ardent food-lovers I know will admit that the places they return to are the ones that do simple food, well. Based in an unassuming new-build building, Cecilia serves modern British food inspired by Ireland, where chef owner Max Rocha grew up, and by his training at St John and The River Café. The menu changes seasonally — all the best menus do — but one can invariably expect steak, a beautifully roasted joint of some lovingly sourced ruminant, and fish straightforwardly grilled with some bright, lemony greens. The prices aren’t outrageous, either: starters roll in under a tenner, and mains hover around the teens and early twenties — a snip at the price for food this good.
32 Andrews Road, E8 4FX, cafececilia.com
Blacklock
It’s a bit of a gamble taking a fussy eater to a restaurant that prides itself on one thing, and one thing only — but if they like hearty chops of meat, excellent executed alongside sides of bread and gravy, beef dripping chips and slaw, they will love Blacklock: a range of restaurants inspired by a traditional chophouses of the 17th century and fuelled by sustainably-farmed meat from the acclaimed butchers, Philip Warren and Son. The sauces are classic and come on the side, and the starters comprise cheese and pickle, mushrooms on toast and crumpets with mutton (or pig’s head on toast for the more adventurous). There are also burgers and a pork belly complete with crackling, for those daunted by the prospect of an door stop-sized chop. Don’t skip their cocktail list, which is strong in every sense of the word, and like the kitchen aims to minimise waste as much as possible. What’s more, they’re under a tenner — almost a rarity in London these days — and the food menu is also generously priced.
Across London, theblacklock.com
The Marksman
When it comes to a fussy eater, it’s hard to go wrong with a good pub that does food. It’s even harder to go wrong with The Marksman whose hit-the-spot dishes live out its name. Let the fussy eater feast on Dorset crab on rye bread, and Scottish langoustines and mayonnaise before diving into a chicken and wild garlic pie with a side of pink fir potatoes (be sure to point out Pink Fir is a potato variety, not a garnish). The curried lamb bun with salt lime yoghurt and grilled pollock with devilled mussels offer plenty for the adventurer to explore — though for my money (and you’ll need more than a few quid to dine here, it’s not cheap), the Marksman’s pies, tarts and simply-dressed seafood are where it’s at. A word to the purists who don’t order cocktails in pubs on principle: I agree, but this pub’s Negroni and Gibson Martini are both genuinely superb.
254 Hackney Road, E2 7SJ, marksmanpublichouse.com
The Churchill Arms
Another good pub that does food, though in both respects The Churchill Arms is a far cry from The Marksman. Both are historic — Georgian and Victorian respectively — but where The Marksman is pared back in its décor, The Churchill Arms is, in their words, “dripping in flowers and crammed with Churchill memorabilia”. Every spot is crammed with something that feels vaguely wartime. Its claim to fame is that Churchill’s grandparents drank here. It’s other claim to fame is that it might have been the first pub to serve Thai food — no-one seems quite sure of this and while the pub’s website claims the place and its Thai chefs have been serving Thai food for 25 years, it’s definitely now more like more than 30.
Of course, London boasts an extraordinary selection of Thai restaurants which have become increasingly reflective of the country’s regional cuisines — but sometimes there’s nothing like a no-messing-about appeal of a good pad Thai. The Churchill Arms has that, as well as prawn toast, spring rolls, green and red curries and all the classics; yet it also has a hot and hearty array of dishes which aren’t so well know, like stir fries Pad Ka-Prao and Pad Himmerparn, served with a meat of choice and fragrant, steaming jasmine rice. It’s a Fuller’s pub, so specialises in cask conditioned ale, but the wine list isn’t at all shabby and both food and drink are reasonably priced.
119 Kensington Church Street, W8 7LN, churchillarmskensington.co.uk
The Colony Grill Rooms
A grill room is generally a safe bet for a fussy eater, and since relaunching earlier this year, the Colony Grill Rooms is on flying form. Chef Ben Boeynaems is meticulous in the sourcing of his ingredients and it shows in his dishes, which deliver all the comfort and familiarity of classic grill food but with more consideration. The shrimp cocktail is one of the best I’ve had: big on shrimps, scant on salad, the dressing served separately so one can dip, dunk, or drizzle accordingly. The strikingly beautiful steak tartare and the rib eye with buttermilk mash and creamed spinach, my fussy friends informed me, were excellent; I was too busy losing myself in my sole meunière to care. Such food, done well, doesn’t come cheap, and for most people The Colony Grill Rooms will have to be special occasion. The staff know this, though, and they deliver on it, with attention to detail and a formality that is friendly, yet charmingly respectful.
The Beaumont, 8 Balderton Street, W1K 6TF, colonygrillroom.com
Oi spaghetti + tiramisù
Given that “oi, somewhere that just does good spaghetti and tiramisu” is almost exactly what my fussiest friend says when I suggest Italian for dinner, it’s not surprising Oi Spaghetti + Tiramisu is where we invariably end up. There’s no need to translate Italian pasta types: as per the name, the pasta is solely spaghetti, tangled up with mushroom, garlic and cream or tomatoes slow cooked with chilli, garlic and capers — and yes, there is garlic bread for starter. In short, then Oi Spaghetti + Tiramisu is simple. Fortunately, it doesn’t skimp on the sourcing, with fresh produce from organic producers in Britain — Flock and Herd are their butchers, for example — and DOP cheese and cured meats from Italy; nor does it skimp on the portions, which are huge and at around a tenner a plate, a winner for the foodie, the fussy and the famished alike.
133 Copeland Road, SE15 3SN, oispaghetti.co.uk
Emilia’s Pasta
Emilia’s Pasta might not have chosen the most colourful locations for its restaurants — but what its exterior and surroundings lack in character, the interior, staff and food more than make up for. Where some might think that burrata’s a bit ‘done’, others (including me) are still seduced by that creamy, velvety burst of milkiness mingled with good olive oil. Emilia’s burrata delivers. Equally compelling, for those with a salt tooth, are the golden, chewy parmesan crisps. It’s the pasta one comes here for though: carbonara, Bolognese, pesto and parmesan — Emilia’s sticks to the classics, and reliably smashes them. Friend still too fussy for it? Direct them towards the Italian bowling in Emilia’s Canary Wharf — one of the first in its kind in the country — and tell them you’ll find them after tucking in.
Across London, emiliaspasta.com
Flat Iron
It’s hard to find a red meat eater who doesn’t like steak. Fussy types might have their cut medium — worse, even — but either way Flat Iron is a restaurant that was practically designed for the unadventurous. That’s not to say it’s boring. Quite the contrary. The steakhouse takes a mindful and considered approach to dining, doing one thing and doing that one thing well. The priority is price: on the menu, bavette steaks, the butcher’s cut, for just £14 per person; sides such as creamed spinach, beef fat chips and macaroni cheese are each just £4. House wines start at £5.50 a glass. Tremendous value. And so Flat Iron is a generous, happy concept, and working hard for, as its strapline says, “everyone”.
Multiple locations; flatironsteak.co.uk
Yard Sale
Now commonly hailed as “London pizza”, Yard Sale is a group of trusted and much-enjoyed pizzerias spanning the city. Now ten years old and with a multitude of fanciful collaborations — rapper Big Zuu, cult Punjabi favourite Tayyabs, and Nigerian tapas joint Chuku’s among them — the menu is playful and often expansive. But there are classics, too. Safe diners might enjoy the margherita, cheese plentiful and crust charred and chewy, the pepperoni or the “mush be love”, which does away with tomato sauce and is served as bianco, with roasted mushrooms and (quite a few people do like it apparently) truffle oil.
Multiple locations; yardsalepizza.com
Dishoom
Curry might not be the obvious choice for fussy diners, but Dishoom provides. The restaurant group operates on a sort of “come one, come all” basis (to loosely quote the comedian Tim Key), with an accessible menu that also happens to be charming. There are spicier, more complex dishes, but for those who want to play it safe, there are samosas, not too hot, lighter chicken curries, lamb kebabs and vegetarian dals and salads. And for those who really are basic? The Britannia biryani which is by no means simple to cook but is ultimately measured and calming to eat: rice, chicken, garlic and ginger are the flavours here. Those who struggle with these might simply stay at home.
Multiple locations; dishoom.com
Flour & Grape
Across London there are restaurants serving pasta. Many are good. Flour & Grape is among the best, crafting shapes freshly each morning, cooking them simply and well, not fetishising anything in a perverse attempt to resemble a small Italian grandmother wearing a chequered apron. Flour & Grape would suit just about anyone who isn’t coeliac. On a supremely affordable menu are items such as bucatini cacio e pepe, gigli with sausage and fennel, and casarecce arrabbiata, spiced moderately.
214 Bermondsey Street, SE1 3TQ; flourandgrape.com
Busaba
Thai food has been fashionable in London for so long and the city’s Thai restaurants have meandered and evolved and become increasingly tantalising. Today we have fun and playful takes on gap year-style eating in the form of Speedboat Bar, and Thai family cooking in Leyton in the form of Singburi, which people with Instagram accounts dedicated to food clamour to visit. And then there are places like Busaba, resolutely old school in technique, method and delivery, and satisfying. What is crucial in this instance is a long menu. Its depth means there are dishes for people who enjoy flavour, but also ones for people who struggle. For example, chicken satay is available, likewise other Thai-in-Britain favourites like weeping tiger and pad Thai. Boring? Actually, no. Comforting and proficiently executed.
