A woman says her first solo holiday abroad left her feeling "alone and intimidated" as hotel guests "laughed at" her. But Lolly McKenzie has used the experience to pass on a message to people who struggle with ADHD and autism.
Lolly, 26, has been recording her experiences on her TikTok channel. The holiday to Majorca was with the aim of taking "the next step" in overcoming her anxiety with social situations.
While the hotel she stayed at was fine, some of the guests weren't, she told the Liverpool ECHO: "You could not walk through the hotel without getting stared through and laughed at, there were groups of friends turning and laughing at you. It was really uncomfortable."
Lolly said she felt some guests had a problem with her being a plus-size woman and dressing less conservatively.
She said: “I think I was being laughed at because I had a bikini on. At one point I was standing at the hotel bar waiting for a drink and I saw this man look at me.
“He sniggered to himself, turned to his group of friends, passed the comment onto them and they started laughing at me too. I don’t know what they were saying, but I know that they were staring at what I was wearing. You can tell the difference between a nice comment and a degrading comment.”
She said their behaviour threatened to derail the holiday as she considered staying in her hotel room for the rest of the trip. She said: “It takes a lot for me to pluck up the courage to be in these situations. I know everything can’t go my way, but you just don’t expect to be repeatedly bullied.”
Lolly was able to overcome her anxieties and enjoy the rest of her holiday at the nearby beach. She said: “It was a very close call between using it to empower and going into my shell and staying in the room. But I tried to look at the bigger picture, and how far I’ve come to even get to that point, so to let them ruin it would have been silly.”
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Lolly is now planning another solo holiday in Greece after recharging the batteries in sunny Spain. She said: “I never imagined I could do this, sometimes I struggle to even go the Asda by myself.”
Lolly is far more sure of herself after receiving her ADHD and diagnosis last year, which she feels took longer because of her gender. The ADHD Centre has argued that adult ADHD symptoms are “more likely to go undiagnosed in women than in men” because women can face extra societal pressures. Therefore, finding a diagnosis can be “extra-stressful and difficult”.
Lolly said: “I’ve had a lot of issues throughout my life because it is harder for women with ADHD and autism. The symptoms are more internalised. Now I have my diagnosis, I know the reasons I react a certain way or why my brain processes things, so it’s a lot easier for me to do things and get over things.”
This increased confidence is reflected in Lolly’s TikTok, where she talks about her issues to help others going through similar problems to more than 50,000 followers. She also started DJ’ing on SoundCloud, a dream career which she had put off pursuing for years.
Lolly said: “I like to use my platform for positivity. I’d encourage people going through similar things to me to believe in themselves. You can do things as long as you put your mind to it and you listen to yourself and put yourself above other people’s opinions.”
