Judith Lucy was performing at the Adelaide Fringe Festival in mid-March when she contracted the dreaded COVID.
"I honestly thought I had a bad head cold because I kept testing negative for COVID," Judith said.
"Then one afternoon, we were meant to do a show that night, it just went to my chest in the space of about 10 minutes.
"And the next thing I was off to emergency. It was a bit hairy there for a minute."
Judith's comedy partner Denise Scott returned to Melbourne, while Judith stayed in Adelaide in isolation.
"The joke is that I was off to hospital and Scotty was on the first flight to Melbourne. And we had to cancel the rest of the season," Judith said.
"I was pretty sick for about 10 days, but I reckon I'm only just getting over the exhaustion now."
When Judith was released from hospital, she sent a text to Denise. She asked her long-time friend if she could drop a sleeping tablet outside her hotel door.
"And I had to text back and say, 'I can't because I'm back in Melbourne in bed with [husband] John'," Denise said.
Judith added: "The reality was I certainly didn't need a sleeping tablet because I spent the next three days asleep. But it was pretty hilarious I got that text.
"We put it straight in the show, as we do with pretty much everything that happens to us."
The duo will perform their show, titled Still Here, at Civic Theatre in Newcastle on Saturday, June 25.
Denise: "We've attempted to write a play, which is a little beyond our comfort zone. The premise is, Judith and I are living together in lockdown and it's about all the crazy stuff that happens."
Judith: "We have taken every kind of experience that occurred in Melbourne and whacked it into a play. It has everything in it from the earthquake [in Victoria] to the riots and there's a guest appearance by Norman Swan."
There's dancing, singing and acting - and some poignant moments.
Judith: "The interesting thing is, we can't sing, dance or act and yet we have not let that stop us."
Denise: "As it turns out, Judith has non-functioning shoulders and my knees are completely useless. So between us we make barely one functioning human being, but we use what we've got."
Judith: "It's a story of hope, overcoming adversity and, despite all of that, my god we've embraced the showbiz."
Asked what the title means - Judith says: "I mean, join the dots. We're two women over 50 and we're still working. It's a f***ing miracle."
Denise: "It really is. That's one thing I give daily gratitude for and have to slap my own face for. How am I still working at 67? No one has tried to get me to lose weight or whiten my teeth."
We urge the pair not to get a boob job.
Judith: "If we got a boob job, it would be to get a reduction."
We also ask the pair how long they've been friends for.
Denise: "We're not friends now after the COVID rift and the abandonment issue. Judith does have issues of abandonment."
Judith: "That's exactly right. I am adopted. It's tit for tat, though. We were about to do an interview with Amanda and Jonesy and I let Scotty do that on her own and abandoned her."
The pair can't remember how they met, but they reckon it must have been at The Last Laugh Comedy Club in Melbourne.
Judith: "Scotty was already in a fantastic group called The Natural Normans. I certainly remember seeing them for the first time. I was blown away. I thought they were absolutely hilarious. God knows that was probably over 30 years ago."
She said the comedy club was "a very famous theatre restaurant that a lot of comedians came up through - Wendy Harmer, Richard Stubbs, Lano and Woodley".
"If you landed a season there, you could be working six nights a week, which was fantastic and that's how you got better at your craft. It was so bittersweet though because, while it was amazing to work that much, it was a bit of a Christians to the lions place as well - lots of buck's nights and hen's nights and parties, just a lot of people drinking."
Comic Minds
The pair have the type of minds that naturally revert to comedy.
Denise: "Post show, we have some serious conversations with no room for comedy - like how tired we are. I don't know whether it's a habit we've formed, but when something happens like Judith's COVID and my abandonment of her, we know how to turn that into comedy gold."
Judith: "I think we've both been doing it for so long and we have turned so many incidents that have happened to us into stories that are funny. I would also argue that a lot of people do that. I think humour has always been a real coping mechanism. I think actually it's a very Australian thing to do as well. Turn a really shit situation into a funny story. I guess it is very much second nature for us."
Even as kids, they used humour.
Judith: "My parents were pretty nutty and fairly unusual. If I hadn't cracked a few jokes at school, I think I just wouldn't have had any friends. I look back and think I found humour to be a pretty good coping mechanism from a pretty early age."
Denise: "Me too. When I was a young kid, I spent a lot of time with my extended family, like aunties, uncles, cousins. Aunty Dot must have been one of the first people I knew to have breast cancer and have a breast removed. She had a fake breast. You'd turn around and she'd just have it sitting on her head. She wouldn't say anything. You'd say, 'There's Aunty Dot sitting with a fake breast on her head'. That was fairly typical of how people in my family dealt with stuff."
