Perhaps they are keeping her in the cellar. Or the storage room under the stairs. If they are feeling charitable, she could be locked in the flat at the top of the building.
For the remainder of her time in Downing Street, Liz Truss will be held prisoner.
Of course, she will be allowed out to attend Prime Minister’s questions. There will be occasional day release for her audience with the King.
And, on condition of good behaviour, she will be allowed to visit one of the few businesses she hasn’t closed down.
Meeting a voter may be allowed later down the line, probably after the election, but at the moment it is regarded as far too dangerous.
Outside No10 she will have to wear a tag and anything she says will be closely monitored in case she makes a policy announcement.
After all, the last thing her minders want is her triggering yet another run on the pound.
And at all times she must be accompanied by her carer/warder Jeremy Hunt.
This is the reality of Truss’s position. Last week, she did not just jettison her disastrous economic strategy, she surrendered her authority.
To be in office but not in power is unsustainable. You cannot hide the conductor in a cupboard and expect the orchestra to play from the same sheet music, let alone stay in tune.
There is no longer any purpose to Truss remaining in Downing Street. If you have no credibility you have no chance of getting any of your plans through Parliament.
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Fracking will not happen.
Her plans to reform planning laws will gather dust.
Any loosening of environmental protections is now for the birds as no sane Tory will want to take on the RSPB, the Wildlife Trust, WWF, the National Trust and Campaign for the Protection of Rural England.
The Cabinet and Conservative MPs will be able to stop Truss committing further damage, but they cannot undo the damage she has already caused.
Chancellor Hunt is going to have to cut public spending.
Housing costs are going to rise. The economy will shrink.
This is the Truss tax.
She will be liable for every tax increase, every mortgage increase and every cut to services.
It would be suicidal for the Conservatives to contest the next election under her leadership.
Which is why she has to go.
