Lionel Messi

When Matthew Pearson has nothing else to do he pitches himself film ideas nicked off Christopher Nolan Photograph: n/a

"The Messiah gave his words of wisdom to his lesser followers," offers Adam Harvey Photograph: n/a

Luke Wallis rubs his eye of Thundera and presents us with Lion-o Messi Photograph: n/a

Incredibly, Stephen Park was the only man to ride the Mr Messi riff Photograph: n/a

Here's Duncan Little: “God created Lionel in his image but the wee genius was aghast at his shocking tackle” Photograph: n/a

"Before bed each night Lionel visualised how the game at Chelsea would look," chuckles John O'Reilly Photograph: n/a

"Lionel soon lived up to his New Maradona tag," splutters Paul Berry with the help of some naughty ladies Photograph: n/a

Rob Moline channels the spirit of Leo Sayer in this effort Photograph: n/a

"Lionel the Wizard's secrets are revealed," ho hums Alfonso Elvira Photograph: n/a