The former Labor leader Bill Shorten has hung up the boots after 17 years in the big house.
“I stand here neither defeated nor disposed, lucky to have served, fortunate to be able to say goodbye and thank you,” Shorten told the House of Representatives in his valedictory speech on Thursday.
He leaves behind a legacy of important reforms such as the national disability insurance scheme, but it’s perhaps his one-liners – his “zingers” – that will remain etched in many memories around the nation.
The comedian Shaun Micallef found them notable enough to dedicate a number of segments to them on his show Mad As Hell.
So, to farewell a master of the craft, here is a selection of Shorten’s most memorable moments.
MC Shorten busts a rhyme
While it’s unfortunately not the only time an Australian politician has tried their hand at music, Shorten’s bars on radio rapping to 50 Cent’s In da Club in 2017 will go down as one of the most notable. And he added in a dab, for good measure.
“I’m Bill Shorten, I’m head of my pack,” he begins, before coming out swinging at his Liberal rivals.
“Our economy’s in debt but Malcolm’s just chillin’. Hey Malcolm, can you lend us a coupla million?
“Will I rap again? It’s anyone’s guess – but there’s more chance of Tony Abbott voting ‘yes’.”
What’s your favourite lettuce?
Politicians live and die by their banter with the regular folk in unscripted shopping centre visits. Shorten’s 2016 tour of the supermarkets of key Australian electorates began with a visit to the Queanbeyan Woolworths and the now infamous inquiry: “What’s your favourite type of lettuce?”
Did the awkward attempt at small talk improve from there? We’ll let you be the judge.
Dancing in Kiribati
It is a well known fact that mixing politicians, music and TV cameras often ends badly. But did that deter Shorten from hitting the dancefloor in Kiribati in 2015? No.
An honourable mention goes to Tanya Plibersek, who swayed slightly more on beat.
Morrison the … simp?
Never one to shy away from a zinger, Shorten (by way of his younger staffers, we suspect) exercised some youthful vernacular to describe his political opponent, Scott Morrison, in 2020.
The upshot? That Morrison shouldn’t present as a “simp” to Donald Trump.
When asked by Insiders host David Speers to define “simp”, Shorten replied “soft”.
What she said!
Shorten was front-and-centre under the Gillard government and, as evidenced here in 2012 before the first female prime minister’s infamous dethroning, a loyal foot soldier.
In a memorable interview, Shorten admitted he didn’t know what Julia Gillard had said about the former Speaker Peter Slipper, but emphasised that he was “sure she’s right”, regardless. (The case against Slipper that Shorten referred to was later dismissed.)
‘At least I’m not a homophobe’
Known for his quick retorts, Shorten was agile when unexpectedly heckled by Cory Bernardi in 2016.
Bernardi, a conservative former senator, had been critical of an anti-bullying initiative for LGBTQI+ school students. As Shorten gave a press conference on the issue, Bernardi walked past and said: “At least I’m honest, Bill. You’re a fraud, mate.”
Shorten responded: “At least I’m not a homophobe.”
Democracy sausage-gate
It was 2016 and Australia’s democracy sausage was a well established convention for Australians going to the polls.
But Shorten struck controversy when he took a big bite right in the middle in front of a hungry press pack. As Shorten said in his valedictory speech, he’s never forgotten the failure and wishes he could go back and “turn that sausage and bread and eat it a different way”.
