It’s been said that you should never look a gift horse in the mouth, meaning that you should accept gifts graciously without questioning their value but, rather, appreciating the thought that went into the gesture.
For one woman though, she’s at her wits’ end with her mother-in-law always gifting expensive clothes to her 1-year-old grandson that he never gets to use or grows out of too quickly. She turned to Mumsnet to vent, but netizens shut her down pretty quickly.
More info: Mumsnet
You shouldn’t look a gift horse in the mouth, as this woman found out the hard way
Her MIL kept buying pricey clothing for her baby grandson, despite the woman asking her not to on several occasions
The woman complained that her child never gets the chance to wear the clothing because she doesn’t want it to get filthy at the childminder
She’s asked her family and in-laws repeatedly not to buy her baby more clothing since she has enough, but that hasn’t stopped her mother-in-law
Image credits: Siamesecatlover
Frustrated, the woman turned to the web to vent, but netizens soon slammed her for acting ungrateful and entitled
OP begins her post by telling the community that it’s her son’s first birthday and Christmas coming up. She adds that she’s not someone who wants or appreciates expensive baby clothes, as she finds them extremely wasteful and not really practical since her son is with a childminder four times a week and comes home filthy.
She goes on to say that she’s made this clear to her family, including her in-laws, a number of times this year and has asked for anything but more baby clothes. OP adds that when her son was born, her in-laws bought him hundreds of pounds worth of clothes, some of which he didn’t even wear or wore just once.
As a result, OP said that for her son’s first birthday and Christmas, she’d prefer some toys rather than more clothes and even provided some links to give her family a clearer idea of what she’s after.
Well, OP got a message from her mother-in-law saying that while she knew OP liked to shop on Vinted, she just couldn’t resist buying some more clothes for OP’s baby. Frustrated, OP shares with her readers that this will be at least the third time this year that her mother-in-law has ignored her pleas for no more clothing.
OP concludes her post by asking the readers whether or not it’d be unreasonable to just accept the gifts and then sell them or return them to fund the purchase of stuff her child would actually enjoy – like the aforementioned toys she’s so low on.
While some readers suggested OP just take the clothes and sell them online, the majority slammed her for being ungracious and acting entitled.
Dealing with entitled people can be a nightmare, but what if the entitled person is you? What signs should you look out for? And how can you overcome this problematic personality trait? We went looking for answers.
In his article for IDEAPOD, Lachlan Brown puts forward some clear signs you’re suffering from self-entitlement. A few of these include setting unrealistic expectations of the people around you, always finding ways to assert your superiority, sincerely thinking you are better than most people, and taking your relationships for granted.
The Pleasant Mind website suggests a few ways to get on top of your sense of self-entitlement. Some of these include recognizing the feeling of entitlement, developing more self-awareness, identifying what you expect from others and the world, and understanding that you’re actually not entitled to anything.
Perhaps OP should do a little soul-searching and learn to express more gratitude before she ends up on a list of entitled jerks like this one.
Image credits: user18526052 / Freepik (not the actual photo)
Bored Panda reached out to psychologist Dr. Deborah Hecker to get her expert take on the situation.
When we asked Dr. Hecker whether she should OP has a right to prescribe the gifts her son receives or if OP was just acting entitled, she had this to say, “By rationalizing her son’s clothing needs (Our son doesn’t need nice clothes so please buy toys) as well as her family’s financial difficulties (I am the only income earner so we would appreciate what he needs, which are toys), this woman has (wrongly) convinced herself that she is entitled to tell her family what they should gift her son for his birthday.”
Hecker goes on, “I do understand her personal stressors and hence need to try to control what her family gifts her son. However, I don’t think there is any polite way of telling people what to buy or avoid giving your child.”
Hecker added that people can easily be insulted and that it’s awkward and likely to sound wrong no matter how it is said. According to Hecker, personal demands and gift-giving are not harmonious. Not to mention that this leaves little joy for the gift-giver.
We asked Dr. Hecker for one piece of advice she’d offer someone suffering from a sense of self-entitlement. She responded, “I would remind them that gift-giving is a gesture of goodwill and celebration. Setting standards for what others want to gift is creating a bad precedent. Gift-giving is all about gratitude and feeling cared for. It’s okay that not every gift will hit the jackpot.”
What do you think? Is OP being ungrateful or does she have a point? Let us know your opinion in the comments!
In the comments, readers told the woman she had no right to dictate what her mother-in-law gifted to her grandson, and some even suggested just selling the clothing she didn’t want
