Weddings are often magical events where couples can celebrate their love with their family and friends. Everyone wants to be a part of such occasions, but the final decision on who to invite rests with the bride and groom. This can sometimes cause problems, making folks feel resentful and left out.
This is what happened to a lady and her friend who were made to feel like they’d be a part of their close pal’s wedding, only to find out that they were never getting an invite. The bride also kept that a secret for a while.
More info: Reddit
Sometimes, people don’t realize how one-sided their friendships are until they are put in specific situations
Image credits: ELEVATE / Pexels (not the actual photo)
The poster shared that in college, she had been in a tight-knit friend group with four girls, one of whom was named Anna, and that they stayed in touch after graduating
Image credits: Getty Images / Unsplash (not the actual photo)
When Anna got engaged, the poster expected to be invited to her wedding, but she soon realized that the invites had been sent out and that she wasn’t going to get one
Image credits: Maria Orlova / Unsplash (not the actual photo)
Anna involved another member of the college friend group in wedding-related activities like picking out her dress, but she didn’t let the woman know she wasn’t invited
Image credits: Kind_Software3325
The poster didn’t feel entitled to an invite to Anna’s wedding, but she felt the woman had been tone-deaf to ask her friends for help without letting them know they weren’t invited
The OP had always felt that Anna and her other college friends were a tight-knit group. They hung out a lot, discussed important things, and kept in touch for many years after graduation. That’s why she assumed that when Anna got married, she would automatically have an invite to her wedding. Unfortunately, as she soon found out, that wasn’t the case at all.
It’s not easy to notice when a friendship is one-sided. Sometimes it only becomes evident if the other person stops making an effort, never contacts first, or only replies after you reach out. This is what the OP noticed Anna doing when the she was planning her wedding but kept avoiding the topic.
When the poster realized that she wasn’t invited to Anna’s marriage ceremony, she felt hurt. Suddenly, she realized that a friend who she considered herself to be close to didn’t see her the same way. It also pained her to think that her pal had hidden the information for so long and only revealed it when probed.
Rather than getting defensive in a situation like this, experts say that one should try and understand their friend’s point of view. People should take time to reflect on their feelings of hurt or frustration and then only discuss the matter with their friends. This will help them understand how the relationship weakened over time and if anything can be done to fix it.
Image credits: Becerra Govea Photo / Pexels (not the actual photo)
Another thing the OP got mad about was that Anna had roped another friend of theirs into the wedding planning process but didn’t let her know that she wasn’t invited. Anna kept trying to push the topic under the rug while still getting a lot of help from her so-called close friends. Both women later bonded over how they had been fooled by the bride.
Whether you’re a part of the wedding party or a friend of the folks getting married, you need to open the lines of communication with the bride and groom. In situations like this, people might feel hurt or taken advantage of if they aren’t invited to the event but are still expected to help out. That’s why having a conversation about expectations can help keep everything above board.
Another thing about weddings is that they can cause problems in friendships. Due to the high stress of planning and being a part of the event, people might end up miscommunicating or taking out their overwhelm on someone else. In the end, it’s important to reflect on how much the bond with the bride or groom means to you and then make an effort to bridge any gaps that appear.
Although it must have been extremely difficult for the poster, she finally made her peace with the fact that Anna wasn’t as invested in the friendship as she was. She mentioned that they still keep in touch once in a while, but that they aren’t as close as they were before. Hopefully this made the OP realize she deserves friendships where she is equally valued.
What do you think about Anna’s actions, and do you think you would have confronted her about what she did? Let us know in the comments section.
People sided with the poster and felt that Anna should have been more honest about the fact that she wasn’t inviting her friends to her wedding
