Kerry Washington has spoken out about her eating disorder, saying the mental health condition was “beyond my control”.
The 46-year-old actress has recounted her past traumas and "body hatred" in her upcoming memoir Thicker Than Water.
Speaking to Good Morning America she said: "I was good at control. I could party all night and drink and smoke and have sex and still show up and have good grades.
"I knew how to manage. I was so high functioning… And the food took me out."
“The body dysmorphia, the body hatred, it was beyond my control and really led me to feeling like I need help from somebody and something bigger than me or I am in trouble, because I don’t know how to live with this," the Scandal star continued.
Washington said she no longer wanted “to be here” because of the pain, which “scared” her.
When asked if she co contemplated suicide, she replied: “Yeah. The behavior was tiny, little acts of trying to destroy myself.”
The Little Fires Everywhere star said she’s now has a “healthier” relationship with food, and these days “there’s no suicidal ideation”.
“I mean, I wouldn’t say that I’d never act out with food,” she added. "It’s just very different now. It’s not to the extreme. There’s no suicidal ideation. That is not where I am anymore.”
The actress, who recently saw a snap of her alongside Meghan, the Duchess of Sussex, and singer Kelly Rowland at Beyonce’s 42nd birthday concert go viral, has been married to American actor and film producer Nnamdi Asomugha, with whom she shares two young children, since 2013.
Her Good Morning America interview will air in full on September 24.
