So here it is again, so-called Blue Monday, anointed (by a travel company) as the most depressing day of the year. In other words, it is technically a ploy designed to feed on and reinforce our feelings of hopelessness during the month-long comedown from December. And who said capitalism didn’t have our best interests at heart!
Still, to be fair to our consumerist overlords, the third Monday of this sterile tundra of a month is a depressing day whichever way you square it — even if a Twitter hashtag also happened to tell you so. Christmas is but a distant dream, while the prospect of spring — or even Wednesday — is a mirage. If the Blue Monday propaganda has got you down, this is your survival guide.
Do nothing
Yes, yes — WFH is real work — blah, blah, blah. But the advantage is that it doesn’t have to be. Sit in a duvet all afternoon! Pretend to have wi-fi problems that mean you can’t join the 3pm Zoom! Play dead when someone Slacks you! You got this.
Give up on Dry January
Let’s face it, you were going to anyway.
Avoid social media
There be monsters! Or to be more specific, “solidarity” from others using the hashtag #BlueMonday — conveniently reminding you of their existence, and the fact that their lives are actually better than yours, today and all days. Misery does not love company, you amateur.
Reach out to friends and family
On the other hand, these people have an obligation to listen to you, however often you record long voice notes on your walk to Tesco about whether you’re “just sleepwalking through the best years of your life”.
Plan a holiday
Hey, there’s a chance it might not get cancelled this year!
The power of positive self-delusion
What is time, anyway? Arbitrary rules won’t tell you how to feel! Pretend it is any other day, of any other year — Tuesday, Christmas, your 21st birthday, London 2012… Whatever floats your boat. No calendar will contain you!
