In his own unique and inimitable style, Jurgen Klopp attempted to sum up what, by all accounts, had been a strange old week at the AXA Centre for Liverpool.
In the bowels of Anfield's media room, fresh from having seen his 10 men earn a battling draw against a well-drilled and organised Crystal Palace side, Klopp, whose injury list is growing to hugely concerning levels, more than hinted at a difficult few days at their base.
Injury rumours on the day of games are nothing new for Liverpool, particularly for a fanbase still scarred by the 2020/21 campaign when setbacks sprung up on a weekly basis, but by Monday afternoon, messaging service WhatsApp was awash with concerns regarding Joel Matip, Joe Gomez and Roberto Firmino. All three, as it turned out, were accurate.
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“The week was crazy," Klopp said. "It was like we had a witch in the building, honestly. Every day somebody else pulled out for the craziest reasons."
Liverpool's team news revealed as much when it dropped an hour before kick-off on Monday night. Nat Phillips was starting his first Premier League game for 15 months. His stay at Anfield is likely only ongoing due to issues to the likes of Ibrahima Konate and Joel Matip.
Phillips started his first top flight game since May 2021 with Joe Gomez unable to come in from the beginning due to an issue of his own. With Konate sidelined with a knee problem and Matip also out for the next couple of weeks, it seemed like the perfect opportunity for Gomez to start for the first time at centre-half in the Premier League since November 2020.
An unspecific knock prevented that, however, while the problems continued further up the field. Having missed last week's trip to Fulham through illness, it was telling that Naby Keita was an unused substitute on Monday night at a time when the bench was hardly brimming with options.
The Guinea international has never been able to count durability among his many gifts and the fact he was unable to make it off the bench as Liverpool toiled suggests a fresh issue had arisen. With Alex Oxlade-Chamberlain, Curtis Jones and Thiago Alcantara currently on the shelf, Klopp was also handed the news that captain Jordan Henderson was also carrying a problem before the game on Monday evening.
“In the end, Joey didn’t start – and Nat did really well, I have to say – because he trained only yesterday again," Klopp said. "At the start of the week he had a little issue. Bobby (Roberto Firmino) couldn’t make it. Hendo this morning we got the information there’s a little concern about something if he plays too long, so he didn’t play that long."
Calvin Ramsay's only sighting in a Liverpool shirt so far was when he completed his move from Aberdeen, while Caoimhin Kelleher and Kaide Gordon also remain unavailable.
One thing that was telling from last week was the lack of pictures from training. Typically, Liverpool's media team post a gallery of the latest images from sessions undertaken at the AXA Centre, often revealing returns for players who have previously been out with injury. That none appeared across the entirety of last week gives further weight to just how peculiar a few days it was at their £50m Kikrby home.
Firmino was absent "as a precaution", while the hamstring injury sustained to Diogo Jota in Thailand means the Reds now head to Manchester United next week with something of a striker shortage too after Darwin Nunez marked his full debut by becoming the first player to be sent off for violent conduct under Klopp at Anfield - less than an hour into his maiden bow.
Barely 60 minutes into a brand new season at home and the folly of allowing both Divock Origi and Takumi Minamino to depart was already being exposed. How Klopp would have loved for one of those from the bench as they struggled to put Palace's backline under any real pressure in the final 25 minutes or so.
The £64m Nunez will now miss matches with United, Bournemouth and Newcastle, which is far from ideal as he continues to get used to the rigours of English football, which, yes, does also include being singled out for rough-house treatment from centre-backs desperate for any edge.
"There was provocation but it was definitely the wrong reaction," Klopp said. "It was a clear red card. We cannot deny that. Unfortunately [he is out] for a few games now and that is not cool for us in our specific situation but that is how it is."
Klopp has at least indicated Firmino will be fit for the visit to Old Trafford, but the Brazilian will need to improve significantly on the display he served up at Fulham on August 6. Having had questions asked of his midfield all summer, the leaks are springing in both defence and attack now too. It's a far from ideal situation.
The manager's tongue-in-cheek suggestion that his squad have been hit with a witch's curse over the last week is unlikely to raise a smile from those who have been steadfast in their insistence that more is needed to supplement this squad in their twin pursuits in the Premier League and Champions League.
"I can imagine the articles, headlines and comments that lead to us but that is life, so we go from there," Klopp added. He is right, too. The questions and the debates will rage. The Reds boss can talk about how exasperating and unexpected the piling list of injuries are right now, but it is not an unprecedented situation. Far from it.
"I don't want to blame different things," said Virgil van Dijk when asked about what was a tough week behind the scenes. "Obviously we want to perform well but it's funny because we played the Community Shield and won and everyone was saying loads of other things and now we have drawn twice and people will write us off. But that's the outside world and we concentrate on what we can influence and that's our performance.
"Today was, in my opinion - especially with 10 men - a great performance. We put them under pressure, made them nervous, let them kick long balls. That's also something we have to learn from, keep going, but we want to win and we'll look for that in the next game."
Having previously suggested he was happy with his options in the transfer market, a lengthening list of absentees has made Klopp's options look threadbare. At a time when Liverpool have made their worst start to a Premier League season under the German, there is much to discuss as the window edges towards its final fortnight.
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