What’s this boozeless breezer missing? I feel like it needs zhuzhing. Er, maybe rare breed sheep? Ah yes, of course, how unbelievably stupid of me to not realise. It is inspired by Orkney after all.
One or two drinks on the Seed Library menu read like gags from Andy Zaltzman, the sometime comedian and longtime cricket fanatic who has mad hair and whose wordplay is madder still. Ingredients such as “century beans” and “quince ripened in a bed of microbes” are flung about the place like so many marbles.
Listen to the Cloud Sour: “Botanist gin, fluffy citrus, faux gras koj”. When cream is used, it’s “really good cream”; some guests might encounter beeswax, others whey.
Look out for “nitro grapes” and “native tropical garum”. I saw one drinker sit down to a Salad. That is to say, a concoction made with gin, lettuce, herbes de Provence and red apple soda. What else?
This Brutalist basement bar below One Hundred Shoreditch — haven to influencers and people who launch interesting zines — is the work of Mr Lyan, who has more awards than my word count may allow. That is to say, there’s genius at play. His cocktails are wizard-like and masterful, careful, zealous creations pertaining to all manner of exotic moments and adventure. Though these are more readily found at his other place, Lyaness, on the South Bank, which is said to be one of the best bars in the world. Test that for yourself.
Seed Library feels neither here nor there. I think he needs to either pare it back and focus on being a really good cocktail bar, possibly with some jazz and comfier seats, or double down and go bananas, with drinks shooting off into space.
At Seed Library, the vibe is less rambunctious, a little more “classic night out”. And if I want a classic Hemingway Daiquiri, I’d like it simple and well-made; for it to turn up as quickly as possible and to a soundtrack that isn’t upsetting. No explanations, please, and you can hold the sheep.
100 Shoreditch High Street, E1 6JQ. Drinks from £15, seedlibraryshoreditch.com
Bar snacks
Hawkstone Lager
From £17 for six, hawkstone.com
Seeing more of Jeremy Clarkson’s Hawkstone lager about? That’s because he gave away 1,000 free kegs (some cider too) to pubs this month. Clarkson launched his own boozer, the Farmer’s Dog, last year, and said his beer brand is what’s keeping it in the black. And yes, it’s good PR. It’s also true that Hawkstone happens to be the dog’s bollocks. Cheers, Clarkson.
Marjorie’s
26 Foubert’s Place, W1, @marjories.london
Any new French-leaning wine bar offers promise. This one, Marjorie’s, comes from hospitality debutants Michael Searle and Josh Anderson, with head chef Giacomo Peretti (ex-Culpeper and others) fronting the food. Escargot, crab tarts, steak — that sort of thing. It all sounds like a distinctly laid-back affair, with 50 seats tucked away across two floors in what was a poke restaurant off Carnaby Street.
