As other late-night hosts take a vacation, Jimmy Kimmel discussed Donald Trump’s financial problems and his search for a running mate as well as the mystery surrounding the Princess of Wales’s whereabouts.
On Jimmy Kimmel Live!, the host started with the swirl of conspiracy theories about the princess with the latest palace statement suggesting she has been working from home.
“How does a princess work from home?” he asked. “I’m just gonna stay in and wave at people?”
But Kimmel did start to question why people have developed such an obsession over where she might be. “It’s not like she’s the bus driver,” he said. With Middleton having recently had surgery, he went on to say “maybe she’s not feeling well” and that people should “leave this woman alone”.
He moved on to Trump, “his Maga-cy” and his attempt to find the money for the $454m bond needed to pay New York courts. Banks are unwilling to lend him the money for the “same reason you wouldn’t loan a watermelon to a hippopotamus”.
Trump might have to consider selling a golf course, his buildings or his plane and Kimmel said there would be “nothing more delightful” than the former president having to take a regular flight.
There are also rumours that he might end up taking the money from a foreign country which would be a “huge national security risk”. He has also launched a fundraiser with the RNC, which gives him the “rare opportunity to bankrupt an organisation that doesn’t have his name on it for once”.
He is also auditioning for a vice-president, “turning this into the Maga-pprentice” with candidates including Ben Carson, “literally a sleeper candidate”.
Another is Marco Rubio so Kimmel played a supercut of clips where Trump called him various names. Kimmel said it would be a thankless job as Trump will end up turning against you, listing the many types of people he has turned on before. “You think this won’t be you too?” he said.
Kimmel said that “destroying people” is “the only thing Donald Trump is good at” and joked: “If he asks you to run, run.”
