Jesse Lingard has said he was at 'rock bottom' after Manchester United defeated Derby 3-0 in the FA Cup in 2020.
Lingard was struggling with his mental health - something which he's now an advocate for - before the pandemic began and he's now opened up about his lowest moment during his years at United, which came after playing Derby in the FA Cup.
The midfielder has revealed he was at 'rock bottom' at the start of March 2020 due to feelings of low self-esteem. He confided in United's doctor and Ole Gunnar Solskaer about his problems and he returned after lockdown as 'one of the fittest' at the club.
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In an interview with The Guardian, ahead of the release of Untold: The Jesse Lingard Story' on Channel 4 this week, the academy graduate has discussed his mental health again, admitting the lockdown gave him a much-needed chance to 'reset'.
"I just felt so much scrutiny, especially after the Derby game and I was getting abuse as I got on the bus," Lingard said. "I can normally take it but sometimes it gets to a point where it’s like: ‘Ahh, I can’t even be arsed doing this anymore.’
"Nobody really knew about my struggles off the pitch so they think: ‘You’re a footballer, you live in a nice house, you’ve got money, you can deal with anything.’ But when it’s someone’s health and well-being – it’s a different situation. We’re all human.
"It was difficult around that moment in time. It was probably [for] months. I didn’t want to play in case I did badly and there was more scrutiny. Football is my happy place but at that time, I couldn’t really put myself in that situation.
"I was playing and I felt like I was nonexistent. The games were just passing me by. When it’s not working out on the pitch, you try to work that bit harder to do well in the next match but my mind wasn’t there to do that.
"I wanted to stop completely and have a break and just be at home. I didn’t want to be on the pitch and have all that scrutiny. You lose a ball and it’s more pressure. You feel like everything is closing in on you. All the weight is on your shoulders.
"You feel closed up. You don’t want the ball, you are hiding away from the ball. That’s never been me."
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