Re Emma Beddington’s dilemma (My dog is 14, ailing – and part of me. How can I tell when it is time for him to go?, 18 June), I am a vet but also a (currently former) dog owner, and know both sides of the story. It is a privilege as well as the hardest thing to be able to let them go.
I had to let my 16-year-old Kiri go after years of companionship and I have no doubt that it was her time. Eventually it comes down to quality of life. Does Oscar have more good days than bad ones? Is he comfortable? If the answer is yes, enjoy every day you have with him. If you have doubts, start a journal to help you keep track. Make the best of every day until the day comes when you know (I knew), and then you can look back at a life fully lived.
Dr Eva-Christina Schliewert
Pretoria, South Africa
• Emma Beddington’s dilemma was movingly and honestly described. It brought back memories for me of walking – perhaps, more accurately, semi‑dragging – my ailing 15-year‑old mongrel dog, Jennie, one morning. An elderly lady came up to me and told me in no uncertain terms that I was being cruel and should take my dog to the vet straight away to have her put to sleep. Unlike Emma, I had been in total denial until then. The very next day I took my dog to the vet. I was broken-hearted but it was the right thing to do – it just took a stranger to say so.
Matthew Davis
London
• Emma Beddington’s reflections about Oscar touched me deeply. Only she can answer the question “When?” But, in my experience, the pet in question usually knows better than the human. And I suspect that Beddington’s husband might be right; Oscar is thinking, “Where am I? Get me out of here!”
The morning that we took our 16-year-old dachshund outside for her usual pee and she gave us a wondering look that said, “Why am I here?”, we knew it was time. And we made a date with our vet. Nothing ever makes these moments easier but if/when we do the right thing, it becomes so much easier to enjoy the memories as time passes. Rosie remains with us almost a decade after she passed.
Duart Snow
Vancouver, Canada
• We have had 12 rescued greyhounds in the last 20-plus years. Whatever people claim about “knowing” when to let go, it isn’t that easy, as far as our experience goes. If you love someone, you never want to say goodbye.
Dr Paul Graves-Brown
Llanelli, Carmarthenshire
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