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Michael Scully

Irish rugby star comes out as gay after fearing he would have to quit game

Leinster scrum-half Nick McCarthy has publicly come out as gay, revealing that he thought he would have to quit rugby before deciding to tell his coaches and colleagues instead.

McCarthy informed Leo Cullen and Stuart Lancaster last November, and his team-mates in January.

The province's head coach Cullen and skipper Johnny Sexton have praised McCarthy for his decision to speak publicly for the first time about his sexuality.

Read more: Ulster star James Hume 'closer' to pipping Garry Ringrose to Ireland 13 shirt, says Alan Quinlan

McCarthy, 27, rejoined Leinster from Munster last summer after two years with the Reds.

“I came out to my teammates in January and I was obviously pretty nervous about doing so,” McCarthy told Leinster's website.

“But I’m really happy that I did it. I struggled with coming out for a while and it was starting to impact on me and my happiness so it was the right decision.

“It affected me so much that I agonised over my future and contemplated walking away from rugby altogether because I just didn’t think I could come out while playing rugby.

“But, I spoke to Leo and Stuart last November and the support that I got from them straight away was unbelievable.

"They helped and guided me over the months that followed so that I felt more comfortable to come out to the group.

Leinster's Nick McCarthy (©INPHO/Bryan Keane)

“It’s not really ‘a thing’, it’s not common for a male athlete to come out in sport, never mind professional rugby, and it’s probably something that I didn’t want to believe or accept myself either.

“I needed to accept being gay myself before I could address it with others. I have great friends in rugby but I didn’t know how they would take it.

“My experience since coming out though has been entirely positive. I have realised that anyone who cares about you, just wants you to be happy.

"I’m lucky to have grown up in a loving environment. My parents, my sister, grandparents and wider family, are totally accepting of me and I’m very thankful for their support.”

Prior to leaving Dublin for Ireland's summer tour of New Zealand, Sexton commented: “I've known Nick since his time in the academy so to hear him talk to us so openly about his struggles has been tough but we are now just delighted for Nick and that he can be himself.

“We talk about looking after our brothers a lot in here and the last few months has been about that, looking out for Nick. And that will continue.

Leinster star Johnny Sexton (©INPHO/Billy Stickland)

“By speaking openly about his sexuality, Nick will be a role model for others and we couldn't be prouder of him.”

Cullen, meanwhile, believes that McCarthy can be a role model for others.

“The main thing when I talked to him first, was that it was great that he was able to talk openly to us," said the Blues supremo.

“Nick is a brilliant individual and we are supportive of him. That’s the most important bit for me.

"We want to make sure that all our guys are able to maximise their ability and be able to bring all of themselves to Leinster Rugby while they are here.

“To be at your best you need to make sure you are working hard but also it’s about being yourself and it’s important you’re not battling against being yourself.

"So doing what’s in your heart, I guess, so we are pleased that Nick has been able to come out with this news so he can start being more comfortable just being himself.”

Cullen added: “Nick has definitely had a battle going on in the back of his mind, and I’m sure there are other young people going through something similar.

“He will be an amazing role model to people because he’s a great person in the group. He’s very popular in the squad.

“We just want what’s best for Nick but he’s going to be an amazing role model, we hope, to lots of young people out there.”

Leinster head coach Leo Cullen (INPHO/Steve Haag)

McCarthy said that it was around this time this year that he came out to close friends, who were very supportive.

"Those conversations continued as I became more comfortable and accepting of myself," he said.

"In many other professions you may not feel the need to discuss your sexuality. But I felt I wasn’t being true to myself.

“Leinster Rugby is built on ‘brotherhood’ and it’s important that we can be open and honest with each other. We spend so much time together, and I now feel very comfortable in this environment being myself.

“Everyone was happy that I could tell them and they could be there for me. Some felt sorry that I couldn’t discuss it sooner but again, I had to get to that point myself.

"My friends have been unbelievable in helping me to accept that I am gay and to help me embrace that part of my life now.

“I only made a quick announcement. But I just remember the room erupting! They were all delighted for me and it was immediately a weight off my shoulders.

“I felt they understood my situation. It’s hard to perform at your best when you are carrying something, anything, and that’s the same for all the lads.

"For me it was my sexuality, for others it could be stuff at home, or studies or whatever.

“I’m a private person so I was unsure about coming out publicly.

“But looking at Carl Nassib (American Football player) or Josh Cavallo (Australian soccer player) coming out and Jack Dunne here in Leinster and how he spoke publicly last year about his bisexuality, has helped me a lot.

"I’ve had good conversations with each of them and they’ve been hugely encouraging.

“In turn, I feel if I can now help others come out in professional sport or in their everyday lives and make being gay more normal and not a thing to be worried about, then that is a positive.

"I’m so much happier than I was a few months ago and I’m optimistic for the future. If one other person, one other kid, keeps playing their sport because they see a Leinster Rugby player has come out and is accepted, that would be a great outcome.

“I’d love people to see, from my experience, that coming out has been really positive, and the biggest hurdle may be in your own head.

“Surround yourself with good people, because anyone that cares for you, wants the best for you. Your sexuality is just a part of who you are, and life is so much better when you can be yourself.”

Belong To and Leinster Rugby

For the month of June, Leinster Rugby are working with Belong To as our charity partner.

Belong To is the national organisation supporting lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender and queer (LGBTQ+) young people in Ireland.

You can contact Belong To at www.belongto.org

Read more: Ireland coach Andy Farrell given "roll the dice" advice on Ulster star ahead of New Zealand tour

Read more: Ulster suffer major blow as star back undergoes surgery following recent injury

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