An Irish mother of three young children has spoken of her shock after her 42-year-old husband Thomas died of a massive stroke less than two weeks ago.
Speaking to Neil Prendeville on Cork’s Red FM, Cork mum Roibhne explained how her husband, who had no health issues, started to get a ringing sensation in his ear along with a headache a few days before tragedy struck the family.
“A few days (before he got the stroke) he had a headache and ringing in his ear and it was driving him nuts so he went to the doctor. His blood pressure was very high and he got tablets for that. The blood pressure came down with the tablets and he was monitoring it at home.”, RSVP Live reports.
Roibhne added: “Then he thought it was an abscess (on his tooth) so he rang the dentist and got antibiotics. But, over the weekend he seemed to get worse and worse.”
Roibhne went on to say that her son had tested positive for Covid on the Saturday so they went into isolation as her husband Thomas was starting a dream new job on the Monday and his fear was catching it before his first day.
Opening up further about her tragedy, she described their situation saying: “My husband was starting a brilliant new job on the Monday and his biggest worry was getting a positive test, so we were trying to mind the young fella and keep him isolated, so I didn’t take as much notice. You don’t think about a ringing in the ear and a headache too much - but as he was getting worse, we thought it was a reaction to the medication he was on.”
On the Sunday evening before he was due to start work Thomas was working on his van outside, but came into the house as he felt unwell, “He said he had a tingling down his left side and I thought he was slurring his words a bit but when he spoke a second time he seemed fine… so I just missed it.”
Thomas got up the next morning without waking Roibhne and the first thing he did was ring a doctor. “I woke up when my mother rang me and I heard noise downstairs and when I ran down I was onto 999 straight away. He was on the couch and he couldn’t move his left side and he was slurring his speech and talking very funny. I knew then it was a stroke but it hadn’t crossed my mind all weekend as he is only 42 and in good health.”
That would be the last time Roibhne would see her husband conscious and she regrets not saying all the things she could have said, “The 999 caller told him to keep him calm so I didn’t say the things I would have liked to have said as I was joking with him, as he was going into the back of the ambulance I was saying ‘anything to get off work’ and he went ‘haha’.
“I would have told him how much I loved him, we said that to each other every single day so it wasn't an issue but I would have said it to him”
The family have faced very difficult times financially over the years and Roibhne’s health has also been bad as she was diagnosed with a serious bowel condition and her gallbladder ‘packed up’ six months later. She also has a rare bleeding disorder which makes surgeries high risk. The family home was being repossessed before Covid started but they had hoped with Thomas’ new job that they were finally getting out of a dark place and would be able to pay the bills.
“He was looking forward to the great new job with DairyGold, it was good money, we were going to start paying our debts, pay off our mortgage and maybe have our first family holiday, just a caravan by the seaside. We have never had a family holiday, even in Ireland because for a few years I was too sick and then we didn’t have the money.”
Roibhan paid tribute to her local community in Kildorrery who have helped her and her children so much over the last few weeks.
“I wouldn’t be standing here today if it wasn’t for the local community. They drove me up and down to the hospital, took care of the kids, organised the funeral and put on a lovely spread. I wouldn’t be able to do that. I was in shock and still in shock, I don’t think I have started grieving yet. I didn’t see it coming. I have trouble accepting it.”
Speaking about the hard times the family faced she explained, ‘Our septic tank has been broken for five years and the boiler has been gone for the last three year. Last year Thomas bought a second hand boiler and was trying to fix it for heat but we had an open fire and hot water bottles for kids. We had electric heaters but we had to ration them. The local community has been fantastic, they fixed our boiler and are working on the septic tank, they have kept the kids going if anything else.”
Everything has been a struggle for this young family and Roibhan emotionally told Neil that she is still waiting for her husband to come in the door, give her a bear hug and tell her everything will be okay.
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