A widespread winter storm has brought heavy snow frigid temperatures to most of the United States this week and is now expected to linger into the holiday weekend. As a result, it was all hands on deck in Eastern Iowa, where even one sportscaster was brought in to keep viewers up-to-date on the weather.
Mark Woodley, usually a sports reporter with KWWL-7 in Waterloo, was that lucky—or unlucky—individual on Thursday morning. With sporting events on hold for most of the weekend, Woodley was tasked with reporting live from the sub-zero temperatures.
The snarky report turned out to be all that viewers could have wished for and more.
“I normally do sports, uh, everything is canceled here for the next couple of days so what better time to ask the sports guy to come in about five hours earlier than he would normally wake up and go stand out in the wind and the snow and the cold and tell other people not to do the same,” Woodley began.
Woodley wasn’t done there, as he continued to deliver hilarious one-liners throughout his time on the morning news.
“This is a really long show,” he said early in the morning. “Tune in for the next couple hours to watch me progressively get crankier and crankier.”
Again on the early wake-up time: “I didn’t even realize that there was a 3:30 also in the morning until today.”
Later on in the show: “I’ve got good news and I’ve got bad news. The good news is that I can still feel my face. The bad news is I kind of wish I couldn’t.”
As the morning continued, Woodley’s remarks only got sassier.
“Can I go back to my regular job?” he asked. “I’m pretty sure, Ryan, that you guys added an extra hour to this show because somebody likes torturing me. Because compared to two and a half hours ago, it is just getting colder and colder.”
Finally, once the sun was up, Woodley got the chance to sign off. Naturally, he left the audience with one final quip.
“Live in Waterloo, for the last time this morning thankfully, I’m Mark Woodley, News 7 KWWL.”
