Righto, Ali Martin’s report is here, which means we’re away – thanks for your company and comments, sorry I couldn’t use them all. Peace out.
Marcus Trescothick – sent out presumably because no player has had a good enough day to appear – says there were good bits, referencing Crawley, but notes that no one went on and England need a better day tomorrow. They won’t look too hard at what India did because they’re “pretty unique” – I know, I know – and have plenty of areas in which they can improve tomorrow. They were expecting more action from ball and pitch first up, are hoping for some early movement and cloud cover tomorrow, and still think they can win.
“Finny is resplendent in some fine overshirts,” advises Guy Hornsby. “I’m a huge fan too. And a big Stephen Finn guy. He’s a sharp pundit, doesn’t take himself too seriously, and seems a lovely man.”
I could not agree more with the second part of this – I think Finn is great and wonder how his Test career might’ve gone had he not had come across a street fighter of Graeme Smith’s calibre…
Also going on…
Can anyone help? These … affairs Steve Finn keeps wearing: do they have a name?
I can’t reiterate this enough. My 10-year-old is not the shy, retiring type, but playing netball has been great for her.
A thoroughly dreadful day for England, but let’s be real: there’ve been way fewer of these that might’ve been expected at the start of the series. India’s spinners bowled majestically on a day-one pitch, finding just enough action to take control of the match. In particular, Kuldeep Yadav was sensational, and it can’t be often, if ever, any side fielded three spinners as brilliant as him, R Ashwin and Ravindra Jadeja.
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India, it turns out, are a decent cricket team. Everything else is commentary.
India end day one on 135-1 in response to England's 218 all out
30th over: India 135-1 (Rohit 52, Gill 26) Gill defends, then forces down the ground to long off and they run two. Then, with the close two balls away and the field up to incite the big shot … he launches over midwicket for six. Of course he does!
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29th over: India 127-1 (Rohit 52, Gill 18) In comms, Ravi notes that Bashir seems to have learnt variations of pace on this tour – he drops after Gill works him away for one on the on side. It’s the only run off the over, and we’ve one left in what’s been another terrific day for India.
28th over: India 126-1 (Rohit 52, Gill 17) Rohit turns around the corner, and Wood dives to stop, brimful of Asha (on the 45); oh the 1990s, and we’ve not even contemplated the extent of our bosom/pillow requirements. A further single follows.
27th over: India 124-1 (Rohit 51, Gill 16) Bashir wheels in again and I really like how repeatable his action is – it means he can bowl wicket-to-wicket and, when it gets o top, rely on himself to put the ball in the right areas. Maiden.
26th over: India 124-1 (Rohit 51, Gill 16) Public service announcement: India have Virat Kohli, Rishabh Pant and Mohammed Shami to come back into this side. Ahahahahaha! Two singles from the over, 15 minutes left of day one.
25th over: India 122-1 (Rohit 50, Gill 15) Rohit turns Bashir around the corner for a single, raising yet another Test 50 – his 18th. And I really enjoy the way he captains too – his players know he believes in them, but also that if they don’t do what they’re meant to, he’ll let them know, perhaps in front of everyone. But right now, he’s congratulating Shubman Gill on a six wellied over midwicket, India in total control of this match.
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24th over: India 115-1 (Rohit 49, Gill 9) Gill waits for Hartley and zetzes him over midwicket for a one-bounce four. If England’s spinners can eliminate the one bad ball in every six, they’ll be a lot better for it.
23rd over: India 111-1 (Rohit 49, Gill 5) Rohit takes Bashir for one, then Gill tries to turn a leg-side ball around the corner and somehow the back of his bat earns him four. A single follows, and England really need another wicket tonight.
“I think we’ve got a baby/bathwater situation with B*****l here”, writes Thomas Atkins. “People focus on stuff like Joe Root’s reverse ramp and the silly attacking shots and forget the other side of it, which is the idea that getting to play a sport for a living is a privilege that should be enjoyed. Whatever happens next, nobody can deny that Stokes and McCullum have come across a method of managing players that reduces the chances of the game taking a devastating mental toll on people. Maybe I’m oversimplifying, but I can’t be the first person to wonder if such an approach might have spared the likes of Jonathan Trott and Marcus Trescothick a lot of pain and anguish, or how Duncan Fletcher or Andy Flower would have handled the Tom Hartley’s entry into the team.”
I agree with all of this. I bet there are more than a handful of workers wondering how much better they’d perform if their bosses were as nurturing as Baz n’ Ben, and who knows, maybe a few bosses inspired to try another way.
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22nd over: India 105-1 (Rohit 48, Gill 0) We’ve nine overs left in the day and can England build pressure? Hartley keeps it tight, wicket-to-wicket as Rohit defends, nurdling the last ball of the over into the on side for the only run from it. He’s playing for the close now, all responsible as captain.
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21st over: India 104-1 (Rohit 47, Gill 0) Rohit was irritated Jaiswal gave that away, his adrenaline pumping at the chance to ravage a young career and rightly so. But what a player, goodness me.
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WICKET! Jaiswal st Foakes b Bashir 57 (India 104-1)
Well done Shoaib Bashir! He knows Jaiswal is coming again so drops a little shorter, his man misses, and Foakes tidies up.
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21st over: India 104-0 (Jaiswal 57, Rohit 47) Yashasvi Jaiswal is an amazing player. He cuts for two then, when Bashir is short, monsters sweep to the fence and he now has fifty in each of this serieseseses’ five Tests. And have a look! Another four follows, swept hard; this is some of the best batting across a five-match contest that I’ve ever seen.
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20th over: India 94-0 (Jaiswal 47, Rohit 47) Three dots, then Rohit chips towards mid off, brought up by Stokes who’s trying to manufacture something … and Anderson can’t quite introduce hand to ball … which of course runs away for four.
19th over: India 90-0 (Jaiswal 47, Rohit 43) Eeesh, Jaiswal has seen enough and bullies Bashir again, skipping down and to leg, forcing four to long on before taking four more off the toes and under the nose, his 700th run of this series zooming through midwicket. What a player. Two singles follow, and I reckon England will be all out for 226 late on day three, losing by an innings and 119.
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18th over: India 80-0 (Jaiswal 38, Rohit 42) Jaiswal nudges down the ground for one, the only run off the over, and if you think England are flagging now, picture them this time tomorrow.
17th over: India 79-0 (Jaiswal 37, Rohit 42) Ben Foakes is doing a lot of shouting, trying to keep his bowlers going in what’s a difficult period of play for them. But Bashir is milked for five singles and England just can’t create any pressure without the movement available to India’s quicks early doors and the overall class of their spinners.
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16th over: India 74-0 (Jaiswal 34, Rohit 40) Hartley continues and Rohit bunts a single down the ground, then Jaiswal stretches to knock to cover for one more.
“I’m also in the Bazball moratorium camp,” writes Will Vignoles. “I love the ethos itself, but the relentless media focus on it does get in the way a bit. For opposition fans, they just point and laugh at how it’s failed and been found out (see Arun’s email), for the (many) self-flagellating England fans, it’s an opportunity to say I told you so and gripe about how they don’t play “proper” test cricket. The simple fact is that as most people thought, India are a better team, with better players. England have fought hard and have produced some good individual performances, but their middle order has been poor and while their bowling has performed well, they’ve really missed a strike option bar Root’s golden arm. India have functioned much better as a team since the first Test, with a phenomenal bowling attack that can contain and attack and pounces on any sign of weakness, and some brilliant batters playing exceptionally well. It’s been a much more fun series than I was expecting, and that’s something. I will be thankful to have a bit of time off from reading endless Bazball obituaries though.”
15th over: India 72-0 (Jaiswal 33, Rohit 39) Chalé! Jaiswal absolutely massacres a sweep through backward square to give him 1000 Test runs quicker than any other Indian opener and slower only than Vinod Kambli – a cautionary tale, I guess, but this boy is a superstar. On the balcony at the start of this over we saw Shubman Gill, in puffa, rehearsing big shots, and India look pretty well set for the next few years. A single follows, and that is drinks.
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14th over: India 66-0 (Jaiswal 28, Rohit 38) We keep seeing shots of Paul Collingwood wearing severe expression; does he have any others? Er, probably not at the moment, because Hartley drags down so Rohit rams over long on for six, then Bairstow has to dive on the fence to turn four into two. I can’t lie, a colossal first-innings deficit looks possible here.
13th over: India 57-0 (Jaiswal 27, Rohit 30) Bashir’s come back well from that first-over mauling and this latest twirl costs him a single to Jaiswal.
“England have not been competitive due to Bazball,” writes Arun Naranayan. “They have been competitive only because Indian batting has not collectively performed in any innings. The highest score is less than 450, even with pretty normal pitches. And this is probably due to poor form and the number of debutants. That might change this time though. And Bazball, or at least Bazball-induced scrambled minds, including Root’s horrific hoicks in Hyderabad and Rajkot and Bairstow today, probably cost them the series. Scrambled because English batsman dont seem to know when to attack and when to defend anymore, a key Test-match skill.”
Yeah, I don’t agree with this. The way England’s spinners have bowled is to do with the Bazball environment, and what’s cost the series is India being a miles better team, however you slice it.
12th over: India 56-0 (Jaiswal 26, Rohit 30) Rohit’s been becalmed of late but when Hartley drops short, he flicks him for four through midwicket … then flips him over midwicket for four more. India are cruising here, and these could be a long few days for the tourists. Idiots, slow down!
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REVIEW! NOT OUT!
Er yeah, no bat.
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12th over: India 47-0 (Jaiswal 25, Rohit 22) Jaiswal takes a single to log on then Rohit misses with a sweep and Foakes is certain he heard something so England review!
11th over: India 47-0 (Jaiswal 25, Rohit 22) Shoaib needed that, a maiden to quieten any doubts. He’s got a lot of confidence, I think, but the clattering Jaiswal handed him, along with his side’s poor batting performance, will have made him think. Otherwise, the OBO is, aside from cricket, for sharing joy and love so here’s an album that’s elevating my life currently: Smallgod’s Bridging the Gap. If we get a better single this year than the Black Sherif collab Fallen Angel, we’re doing very well.
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10th over: India 47-0 (Jaiswal 25, Rohit 22) Ben Stokes badly needs to make something happen, but shy of trying himself or Root’s golden arm, he’s not much in the way of options. Three singles milked from this latest Hartley over, and there’s no sense of pressure building – well there is, but on Bashir, who’s got to wheel in knowing his last effort went for 18. He’ll be delighted Rohit is on strike.
“If you had to make your international debut for India, with all its associated stress, where better to do so than in your home country, on the type of wicket that you’ve played on pretty much all your life, and in a team alongside half a dozen of the world’s current best players?” wonders Peter McDonald. “Stokes’ team have at least made a game of it at several points in each match. Ok, they couldn’t or didn’t sustain it, and poor shot choices cost them wickets at crucial moments, but the core of this Indian team is seriously good, and England have lost series here far more abjectly and less entertainingly in the past. Were they perfect? Far from it. Were they awful? Ditto. Did the selectors learn things? I bloody well hope so. Two or three new spinners, (maybe prepare some nice pitches for them back home?), a clearer appreciation of how aggressive to be and when, and an awareness that people seem to be enjoying playing for England. It doesn’t beat winning for England, but it’s not for the want of trying.
I just wish that young boys and girls were not being shut out from watching by paywalls. (Ok, old blokes too...)”
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9th over: India 44-0 (Jaiswal 24, Rohit 20) Bashir replaces Anderson so it’s spin from both ends, and after a quick look, Jaiswal frees arms and flows six over long off. It’s so affirmingly, mortifyingly easy for him and, as I type, he flays six more flat over cover! England do not need this and he knows it – Bashir was able to hold down an end last Test – but this Test, he’s having his end tanned, a second consecutive maximum and third in four deliveries flayed over long on! What a ridiculous freak of nature this ridiculous freak of nature is.
8th over: India 26-0 (Jaiswal 6, Rohit 20) Stokes introduces Hartley to the attack and I guess, thinking about the English summer, he’s the Gilo option. Of the other available possibilities, Rehan has perhaps the biggest upside as a batting leggie, while Bashir has in mentally and loads of improving to do. Hartley, though, also has the problem of Nathan Lyon at his county but he starts nicely here, beating Jaiswal with turn before his final ball is pushed to long on for a single, the only run of a promising first over.
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7th over: India 25-0 (Jaiswal 5, Rohit 20) Before the review, Jaiswal, playing nicely within himself, took a single to square leg; it’s the only run from the over.
“In other news,” returns Kim Thonger, “while waiting for Jimmy to get to his 700, I’ve been doing background Wikipedia research which suggests this game is being played in the Indian equivalent of an Alpine meadow. ‘The indigenous people of the Dharamshala area (and the surrounding region) are the Gaddis, a predominantly Hindi group who traditionally lived a nomadic or semi-nomadic transhumant lifestyle’. Furthermore, ‘Transhumance is a type of pastoralism or nomadism, a seasonal movement of livestock between fixed summer and winter pastures,’ and ‘In many languages there are words for the higher summer pastures, and frequently these words have been used as place names: e.g. Alp in German-speaking regions of Switzerland.’ So why isn’t there a cricket ground at the foot of the Matterhorn?”
I don’t know, but if I’m not on the OBO next winter, it’s because I’m indulging my new hobby of transhumanning.
NOT OUT!
And he hasn’t! Poor Joel Wilson.
REVIEW!
A laughing Rohit is certain he’s not hit this.
WICKET! Rohit Sharma c Foakes b Aderson 20 (India 25-1)
Rohit presses forward, follows one slanting down leg around the corner … and up goes the finger!
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6th over: India 24-0 (Jaiswal 4, Rohit 20) Ooh yeah! Wood overpitches by a fraction and Rohit waits, then strokes a luscious drive down the ground for four. A similar shot adds two more then there’s a pause while we change a ball that is steadfastly refusing to take wickets. Otherwise, how good have the pitches been this series? And how good is it to watch one of five Tests? The problem, of course, is only England, India and Australia are allowed to play them.
“While collectively assessing the relative merits of B*#%ll,” begins Patrick Walsh, “perhaps a quite bit of reflection and acknowledgement that this is as good a spin bowling lineup as has been on any park, ever. And Bumrah is the new ball option. That they’re staying in the game , in India, that’s something. Great series. Tickets booked for Ashes 25.”
I agree with pretty much all of that. Last time England came to India they lost 3-1 and 4-1 looks likely here, but if Test cricket teaches us one thing, it’s the importance of the journey. You have to win, of course, but if that was all we were after we’d just flip a coin.
5th over: India 18-0 (Jaiswal 4, Rohit 14) Jaiswal, the man of this series and who knows how many more to come, eases two to cover, the only runs of the over. I don’t think it’ll be long before we see spin.
“Can we please have a temporary (or, sod it, permanent) ban on on the word ‘Bazball’ in the OBO?” beseeches Alex Wilson. “Like in almost every Test series, this has been a real mixture of positives and negatives for England. It would be nice for people to try and appraise them properly. We used to be able to talk about Test cricket with nuance, but now thanks to the media confection of ‘Bazball’, all we ever seem to manage is ‘MUH BAZBALL GOOD’, ‘NAH BAZBALL BAD’. It’s like the entire global community of Test cricket fans have had a collective lobotomy. We can all do better, and we certainly deserve better.”
You don’t have to like the phrase – it’s not very cool, I agree – but it does describe something, and I don’t think its deployment is the enemy of nuance. We’re still able to discuss what it is, what it means and what we think about it, and the extent to which it’s elevated this thing of ours – in mine, of course – is worth a crap moniker.
4th over: India 16-0 (Jaiswal 2, Rohit 14) Rohit’s playing Wood nicely here, getting forward to defend – he knows there’ll be easier runs to come … so of course after three dots, he follows a lifter playing a typical flip over his shoulder for six! I don’t know anyone who plays that shot better, and a lush square drive for four follows.
3rd over: India 6-0 (Jaiswal 2, Rohit 4) They’ve been introduced by a government promoting its chosen colour, which doesn’t sit right but, er, that aside, these orange India hoodies are rude in the extreme. Maiden, Anderson’s 1718th in Tests.
“100% agree,” says Rowan Sweeney who knows how to get his email published. “Jimmy Anderson’s hair is firmly in the ‘How do you, fellow kids’ territory. Almost bordering on the uncanny valley of AI art.”
It like Tony Cascarino dying his hair grey so his manager wouldn’t realise he was getting on. I think Anderson is 41, but no one really talks about it so it’s hard to be sure.
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2nd over: India 6-0 (Jaiswal 2, Rohit 4) Mark Wood will hurl himself in here and England really need something from him. But after Jaiswal takes one, Wood flings down at 148kph … Rohit ponders the existence of existence, makes a cuppa … and punches a lovely back-foot drive for four through cover.
“If England lose 4-1, then let’s be honest, those are either in line with, or better than, our expectations,” writes Kevin Wilson. '“England came here with the greenest spin attack they ever have and the gulf in quality between Hartley, Bashir, Ahmed and Root (who have bowled pretty well), and Ashwin, Jadeja, Patel and Yadav cannot be overestimated. England pulled off a bit of a heist in the first test but there have been ‘moments’ in the other tests where England were competing and had things turned out differently, the result could have been closer. But I was expecting five innings defeats, so this is a bonus, even if England have been careless at times with the bat.”
1st over: India 1-0 (Jaiswal 1, Rohit 0) Anderson is on the money right away and there’s a bit of swing out there but, more importantly, at what age does one stop highlighting one’s hair? This one looks a proper Sun In job, hairdryer out in front of the mirror, parents not a clue what’s going on; I reckon an earring’s coming next. Anyway, Jaiswal takes a single and he now has the most runs ever scored by an Indian against England, his 656 taking him beyond Rohit in 2016-17. Anderson then beats Rohit, who edges with soft hands, and there’s a little bit out there for the England teenager.
Anderson has the ball, needing two Test wickets for 700.
Out come the India openers and this isn’t even a nasty little session to survive, it’s time to build a base.
“Love the OBO and thank you for all the work that you do,” says Domink Hindal, “but this ‘England have made a belting contest out of a series that should’ve been a procession, and today’s collapse was not really a product of a ultra-aggressive strategy, more fine bowling and frazzled minds at the end of a demanding tour’ is a cop out. India have their most inexperienced batting line up in 40 years or more. Frazzled minds etc, come on, they had two one-week breaks, went to Abu Dhabi and played golf. Why should’t they be held to account for not being able to capitalise on strong positions against an incredibly inexperienced indian batting line up given the strength in depth of England’s own batting?”
What is inaccurate about what I said? We can talk about batters getting out to poor shots too – indeed we have all series – but the pressure of elite sport is significant, and I don’t think this collapse was a product of wild batting, and India are by far the better side. We can be frustrated in how England have handled decent positions, but we surely can’t convince ourselves they’re a side on a par with their hosts can we?
“As an Indian fan I think there needs to be some magnanimity in victory,” says Arul Kanhere. “It was not too long-ago out team was outplayed in a home World Cup, and the English turned a 190-run deficit on our heads. The philosophy works well for them (Rohit himself said they were a better team than 2021) and despite needing some refinements have played better cricket than the scoreline would suggest. (As with India’s tour of 2018). Elite sports have a way of equalising things in a matter of seconds. No need to gloat.”
Gloating is a crucial part of sport, but I agree with your series analysis. If England play traditionally, they get battered in a different, far less appealing way.
“It’s now more than 20 overs since Crawley tickled Bumrah down the leg side, and I still haven’t got over it,” notes Patrick Treacy. “(Forty-five next birthday, since you ask).”
Me too … tomorrow? Oh, thanks guys!
Anderson c Padikkal b Ashwin 0 (England 218 all out)
From 175-3 to 218 all out! India have routed England here, Anderson swatting to midwicket where Padikkal takes another smart debut catch. Ashwin has a 100th-Test fourfer; well done old mate.
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NOT OUT!
Yup, a clear edge there.
58th over: England 218-9 (Bashir 6, Anderson 0) Anderson comes forward, wears his first ball on the pad and there’s an appeal. I think there’s an edge here, but when the ump[ire says no, India review…
WICKET! Foakes b Ashwin 24 (England 218-9)
Foakes comes down definitively, on one knee to pull. But he misses, the ball flicks pad then glove … and very gently dribbles into the stumps as he looks on aghast, plopping off bails; off he pops.
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57th over: England 218-8 (Foakes 19, Bashir 6) i’ve actually be to Dharamsala, now that you ask, where I found – in Bhagsu – excellent custard, and in McLeod-Ganj excellent chilli chips. Do not, though, back yourself to sleep lying across the back seat of the bus when you make your descent; really, really do not do that. Especially if you’ve just scranned two bowls of the aforementioned carbalicious treat. Otherwise, Bumrah is back and a no-ball shows the situation is getting to him then, following a single to Bashir, Foakes pulls again and Ashwin chases, dives … but can’t keep it from crossing the trope. And look at this! A no-ball and a single, then a cut so late it’s posthumous earns Bashir four and India need to be a little careful here; they’ve leaked 24 runs in two overs since tea, and if they’re not careful, a paltry total may soon become a meagre one.
56th over: England 206-8 (Foakes 19, Bashir 6) It’s on! Foakes comes down to Ashwin’s opening delivery and drives four through midwicket, then two singles up the pressure and raise the 200. India are wilting under the onslaught here, and as I type, Foakes goes again, adding two two square leg then pulling four more! Twelve off the over.
“I hope everyone currently making with the negative waves will have the good grace to apologise when Foakes and Bashir both reach their hundreds just after lunch tomorrow,” writes Kim Thonger, clearly underestimating the power of this legendary England tail.
Right, we go again. Here comes the counter!
Naturally, there’ll be a lot of Bazball chatter, so let’s remind ourselves: England have made a belting contest out of a series that should’ve been a procession, and today’s collapse was not really a product of a ultra-aggressive strategy, more fine bowling and frazzled minds at the end of a demanding tour.
“I’m not quite sure what all the fuss is about,” chuckles Chris. “I think that both Root and Bairstow have improved their series averages today....”
Like all good writers, I need to make this about ME ME ME ME, so: I took over at drinks, England 152-3; an hour later, the Test feels almost over.
55th over: England 194-8 (Foakes 8, Bashir 5) This might be the last over before tea and you can be sure Jadeja will want something from it; I love how quickly he rushes through, giving the batter no respite. Foakes turns a single towards midwicket, Bashir plays away two dots, and that is indeed tea,
54th over: England 190-8 (Foakes 7, Bashir 5) Two singles off the first three balls of the over – England are milking Ashwin now, just look at them! – then Foakes takes a third, Bashir beaten by a final delivery that spins across him.
53rd over: England 190-8 (Foakes 5, Bashir 4) Foakes sticks one to cover, then Bashir turns around the corner … hitting Sarfraz’s wrist at short leg! Not sure he know loads about that so India go again, Jadeja hitting Bashir on the pad … the appeal is rejected.
52nd over: England 189-8 (Foakes 4, Bashir 4) Single to Foakes, then Bashir slog-sweeps the last ball of the over for four. He’s got some pretty impressive moxie, and I wonder if he’ll be the one spinner England use at the start of their summer.
“Looks like we have another English batting collapse which will be blamed on the pitch, conditions, homesickness, umpires and ICC,” says Aniket Chowdhury. “This is an abysmal display by the English team on an excellent Day 1 batting pitch. Instead of capitalising on the toss and conditions to put up a 500+ total, they are again chasing the game. The matter of the fact is that this blind belief in the mindless Bazball philosophy only worked as a shock tactic at home or against mediocre opposition. As an Indian fan, I don’t mind it though. It just gives us easy wins.”
Yeah, I don’t think I agree with this. England haven’t blamed anyone, they’re developing against the best home side in the world, and Bazball is the only reason this series has been entertaining with matches in the balance through the four or five days. But India win it whatever the tourists’ tactics.
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51st over: England 184-8 (Foakes 3, Bashir 0) I know in comms, they keep saying this isn’t a raging bunsen and it isn’t, but when the pitch does just enough or, like this one, does something sometimes, it can be harder to bat on. England have tossed away a few wickets as they do, but the bowling has been excellent and, as I type, Jadeja sees Bashir edge … and Jurel can only palm it away. One off the over, a single to Foakes shoved into the off side, and at this point it doesn’t feel like it matters what this partnership does because the scale of the first-innings deficit will be definitive.
50th over: England 183-8 (Foakes 2, Bashir 0) Cunning: England keep Anderson in reserve, sending out Bashir at nine; he plays away two dots, just, to leave Ashwin with a poxy double-wicket maiden. Already, it feels like this Test is over, five wickets down for eight runs in 37 deliveries.
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WICKET! Wood c Jurel b Ashwin 0 (England 183-8)
Mates, it’s good to be back. Wood, pinned on the crease, edges behind, and on a flat track, India’s spinners have put England over the knee. They are brilliant, people, so drink them in.
WICKET! Hartley c Padikkal b Ashwin 6 (England 183-7)
It’s taken a while, but we’ve got here in the end: England are falling apart. Hartley goes down on one knee to slog-sweep, bat timezones away from body and, falling away by the rope, Padikkal holds on to a fine debut catch.
49th over: England 183-6 (Foakes 2, Hartley 6) Jadeja rushes through a maiden, pressure building.
“On Cricinfo’s live blog, it was wondered whether Bairstow is here for a long time or a good time”, says Arun Narayanan. “Answer: ‘he is here for a good time.’ How can this justify a Test place that must be earned and surely must require a whole lot more hard work. Sure, you can have a good time smashing sixes and make the odd fastest 100 or 200. But, what price consistency? How about putting a price on your wicket? This is befuddling cricket from Bairstow.”
We do’t know his instructions, so it’s hard to judge, but yes, it’s fair to say England have suffered this series because they’ve struggled to convert starts to scores and scores to daddys.
48th over: England 183-6 (Foakes 2, Hartley 6) It’s important to note this pitch isn’t doing loads, but sometimes that’s best for a spinner – a bit but not too much – and just what England need, here’s Ashwin on to replace Kuldeep. I’m a little surprised because given the batters aren’t picking his googly, might he be able to run through the tail? Hartley and Foakes take single apiece, and somehow, between them, they need to build something here.
47th over: England 181-6 (Foakes 1, Hartley 5) This really is fantastic bowling, England’s batters unable to pick Kuldeep’s googly; where’s Ian Salisbury when you need him, eh? Two singles from the over.
“I don’t think there has been enough conversation regarding Ben Stokes’ continued poor form in this entire tour,” says Jijo Vadukoot. “What do you make of it?”
I guess not much beyond it happens. We know who he is and what he can do.
46th over: England 179-6 (Foakes 0, Hartley 4) Hartley’s batted nicely this series and shonuff he gets away with a swat down the ground for four.
“This match really is cricket’s Ode to Beauty,” writes Colum Fordham, “what with the stunning backdrop of the Himalayas, the lovely flighted deliveries of Kuldeep, and the gloriously attacking shots of Crawley and Bairstow. After all the youngsters (Bashir and Hartley) and the young (ish) guns as openers, it feels strangely Old School to have Root and YJB in together. It would be poetic indeed if Bairstow could make an innings to remember to mark his 100th cap. Except he hasn’t. Bother! England are in the Kuldeep stuff.”
OUT!
Three reds, Stokes pushed too far back to react, and Kuldeep has fifer and it’s not even teatime on day one! Three wickets down on 175!
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REVIEW!
I don’t know, feels matter-of-principally to me.
WICKET! Stokes lbw b Kuldeep Yadav 0 (England 175-6)
This is a spell – really, all these wickets should be b Kuldeep & Jadeja – but specifically here, Stokes is done by the wrongun … is the impact maybe high? I’m reaching.
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46th over: England 175-5 (Stokes o, Foakes 0) If Jonny doesn’t score something serious second dig and Brook is available for West Indies, does Foakes keep? Another decent contribution here at least asks the question, but meantime Kuldeep turns one past Stokes’ outside edge, totally befuddling him…
45th over: England 175-5 (Stokes o, Foakes 0) We mustn’t forget to credit the bowling here, Jadeja nobbling Root with one that spun followed by one that didn’t. England are in trouble, again looking for a competitive rather than a definitive or even commanding total.
OUT!
One brings two! In five balls! They were 137-2, now they’re 175-5 and whether in traditional monochrome or glorious Bazballian technicolor, you just cannot beat an England batting collapse.
REVIEW!
More in hope than judgment, I think.
WICKET! Root lbw b Jadeja 26 (England 175-5)
This one straightens, beats the bat and raps the pad; it looks good to me, and England are doing their thing, India theirs.
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45th over: England 175-4 (Root 26, Stokes o) Jazzer from Jadeja, who finds drift and grip to beat Root’s outside edge.
44th over: England 175-4 (Root 26, Stokes o) That was Kuldeep’s 50th Test wicket; well bowled old mate. Stokes sees off the last two balls of the over and so far, so Testvangelists.
OUT!
There was an edge – a thin one, but Jonny thought he’d hit the ground. He hadn’t.
REVIEW!
That came pretty quickly.
WICKET! Bairstow c Jurel b Kuldeep Yadav 29 (England 175-4)
Wickets at regular intervals! Bat well away from body, Jonny appears to edge behind pursuing a wrongun, Jurel pouches and wheels away … then up goes the finger, bowler and fielders certain.
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44th over: England 175-3 (Root 26, Bairstow 29) Yeah, Jonny fancies this. He waits for Kuldeep, hauling from outside off over midwicket for six, and anything full, he’s unloading the not-insubstantial suitcase. So next ball he goes again, sending two to deep backward square…
43rd over: England 167-3 (Root 26, Bairstow 21) Looking at that drop again, it’s one of those you see in slowmo and think heh, total slice of urine, but Jonny is especially jonny today, his full corporeality behind every shot, and the power was immense. Anyroad, back in the middle, Root eases away his – and Ronald’s – signature glance through third for four, the only runs from the over.
42nd over: England 163-3 (Root 22, Bairstow 21) I love the energy Kuldeep brings to the crease – and outfield – and he’ll be buzzing off the day he’s had so far. Of course, as I type that, Bairstow clobbers him flat down the ground for six, then cuts beautifully for three more. He’ll be desperate to bag a ton here in order to really show all those who want nothing but the best for him – what a mentality! – then, after Root takes a second single of the over, he hammers back a potential return catch that’s too hot for Kuldeep to hold and he now stands wringing his hands gingerly. Eleven off the over and how expensive might that prove to be?
Thanks Rob and morning everyone. We’re poised.
41st over: England 152-3 (Root 20, Bairstow 12) There are a few oohs and aahs from the close fielders when Root inside-edges Jadeja into the leg side, and again when Bairstow thick-edges on the off side. Bairstow decides to eff that for a lark and drags the next ball wide of mid-on for four. That takes him to 12 from 10 balls.
That’s drinks, after which Daniel Harris will be with you for the rest of the day. Bye!
40th over: England 147-3 (Root 19, Bairstow 8) Kuldeep’s series average of 21.20 is second only to the mighty Bumrah. Ben Stokes’ run out of Jadeja at Hyderabad may have done India a perverse kind of favour. Jadeja missed the second Test; through injury, Kuldeep outbowled Axar Patel and he stayed in the team when Jadeja was fit again.
Two from Kuldeep’s over, which ends with a seriously tempting, flighted delivery to Bairstw. He resists the urge to panel it into the crowd and instead plays an immaculate forward defensive.
39th over: England 145-3 (Root 18, Bairstow 7) Bairstow has started busily. From memory he has looked in decent touch in every game apart from the third Test, which will make him even more frustrated that he hasn’t reached 40.
38th over: England 143-3 (Root 17, Bairstow 6) The new batter is Jonny Bairstow, playing his 100th Test, and he gets his first boundary with a well placed clip past fine leg.
“Pope’s 196 is the outlier in a run of very poor form,” writes Max Williams. “Can’t think of another batsman who’s produced one innings of such sublimity amid such poor returns - although Graeme Smith never passed 40 in the three Tests after smashing consecutive double tons vs England in 2003. Not quite the same though.”
You want a high ceiling and a subterranean basement, Brian Lara is always your man. This is his run of form in 2005-06: 0, 5, 36, 30, 14, 13, 45, 226, 17, 5, 0, 1, 1.
That was a gorgeous delivery from Kuldeep: it was tossed up, inviting a big drive, and turned dramatically between bat and pad to hit the outside of leg stump. Crawley fails to convert again, though he played another excellent knock. Kuldeep, the unsung hero of the series, has his third wicket of the day.
Updated
WICKET! England 137-3 (Crawley b Kuldeep 79)
England are no longer in a promising position. Zak Crawley has been bowled by a ripper from Kuldeep Yadav!
37th over: England 137-2 (Crawley 79, Root 17) England are in a promising position – and, for now at least, they have seen off Jasprit Bumrah. Jadeja replaces him and drops Crawley off his own bowling. It was a very sharp chance, one-handed above his head when Crawley blasted the ball whence it came, but he’s such a great fielder that it’s a surprise he didn’t take it.
36th over: England 136-2 (Crawley 78, Root 17) Root seizes upon a rare half-tracker from Kuldeep, spanking it wide of the leg-side sweeper for four.
“Apologies for the multiclaused complex sentence below...” says Tom Van der Gucht. “Following the emergence of Hartley’s all-round skillset and Stokes return to bowling fitness alongside the potential decline of Robinson and Leach’s ongoing injury curse; not to mention the hopeful return of Brook balanced against Bairstow’s lean series with the bat as well as Foakes’ silky glovework and Potts’ county and England Lions form, do you have any predictions about who will line up for England this summer?”
About 15 people. If I were to play Quasimodo, I’d predict this XI for the opening Test against West Indies: Crawley, Duckett, Pope, Root, Brook, Stokes, Bairstow, Rehan, Wood, Potts, Anderson. But I wouldn’t be surprised if it was a completely different attack: Woakes, Hartley, Robinson, Tongue. So much depends on fitness and conditions.
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35th over: England 129-2 (Crawley 75, Root 13) Root has started pretty well, though he rarely looks totally comfortable against Bumrah. A mistimed pull goes straight to ground, then he dugs out a yorker. Another maiden.
“You said, ‘I doubt even Stephen Malkmus could get ‘peripatetic’ into his lyrics’,” writes Stephen Nichols. “Cricket fan Neil Hannon managed this beauty in a Divine Comedy song: ‘Daddy drives the mobile library. He works peripatetically’. He’s a genius.”
Daddy?
Updated
34th over: England 129-2 (Crawley 75, Root 13) A maiden from Kuldeep to Crawley. England want to attack him, they really do, but they just need one more score like it’s easier said than done.
33rd over: England 129-2 (Crawley 75, Root 13) Jurel is convinced Crawley has tickled Bumrah down the leg side and throws the ball up in celebration. The umpire says not out and India convene to discuss a review. This time Sarfaraz doesn’t want to know – he strolls off with a comical, nah-dunno-mate expression, and eventually Rohit decides against going upstairs. Replays show… nothing. Sweet bugger all. That’s a good non-review from Rohit.
Crawley then softens his hands to steer Bumrah for four. That boundary makes him the first visiting player to score 400 runs in a series in India since Steve Smith seven years ago. Playing a five-Test series helps but that’s still a fine achievement.
32nd over: England 124-2 (Crawley 70, Root 13) Crawley pushes Kuldeep down the ground for a single to move into the seventies. It’s a sign of his ability that he has played a fairly subdued innings of 70 from 90 balls.
“This is a decent start from England, Pope’s skittish self-immolation aside,” says Guy Hornsby. “Fascinating that Jurel called it, he’s a real talent, isn’t he. I hesitate to say it because, well, all the usual reasons, but Crawley really should make this one count. He’s been really good this series but has let a few big ones go. I dearly, dearly hope he does. I was one who didn’t think he should’ve been retained in the side last summer and my god it’s been great eating my words.”
They always taste better when they’re civilised.
31st over: England 122-2 (Crawley 69, Root 12) Bumrah is working Root over with his usual mix of inswing and outswing. Root pushes defensively and is beaten; then he follows Sir Geoffrey’s advice and gets down the other end.
A big inswinger from Bumrah to Crawley flies down the leg side for two byes, with the diving Jurel doing well to save the boundary. Jimmy Anderson will love how much Bumrah is moving the old balll.
30th over: England 119-2 (Crawley 69, Root 11) Crawley is struggling a little against Kuldeep, certainly compared to the other spinners, and again misses a sweep at a ball that would have missed leg stump. But the lovely thing about Crawley is that the false strokes don’t stay in his head. Later in the over Kuldeep overpitches and Crawley threads another immaculate drive between extra cover and mid-off for four.
Crawley’s conversion rate of fifties-to-hundreds is a lowish 24 per cent, so he’ll be desperate to make this count.
29th over: England 113-2 (Crawley 63, Root 11) Bumrah to Root, part two. An inswinger is clipped crisply through square leg for four, though Bumrah thinks it was close and puts his hands on his head. Another inducker is flicked very fine for four, past the diving Jurel at catchable height.
Bumrah is making the old ball do plenty – I think it’s orthodox swing – and the over ends with Eoot getting a leading edge just short of point.
28th over: England 105-2 (Crawley 63, Root 3) Root smiles respectfully after being beaten on the inside by a beauty from Kuldeep. He’s bowling very well, as he has all series pretty much, particularly since that crucial third morning of the third Test.
27th over: England 102-2 (Crawley 61, Root 2) In a surprising development, the arrival of Joe Root means the return of Jasprit Bumrah. He steers a single to third man, which punctures the tension until the next over.
“Rob,” says John Starbuck. “Following your phrase just before lunch...
This is the way we hold the bat,
Hold the bat, hold the bat,
This is the way we hold the bat with an unlikely long handle.This is the way we baz the ball,
Baz the ball, baz the ball,
This is the way we baz the ball in Dharamsala’s first dayThis is the way that England play,
England play, England play,
This is the way that England play on a cold Indian morning.
Why am I hearing that in Gary Neville’s voice?
The replay shows Crawley would have been out had India reviewed. Rohit Sharma smiles and acknowledges Sarfaraz, who had been desperate for India to review.
26th over: England 101-2 (Crawley 61, Root 1) Kuldeep finishes the over that he started before lunch. Crawley pushes at a ball down the leg side that is fumbled by Jurel and brilliantly caught by Sarfaraz at short leg. It’s given not out on the field and, after an animated discussion, India decide not to review.
Lunchtime reading
This is very good. So read it, dammit.
Lunch
The wicket means it will the last ball before lunch. Kuldeep Yadav, who has quietly been one of the players of the series, has taken two important wickets to make it a 50/50 session.
It was a strange morning in that England lost no wickets when they were really under pressure and two wickets when life got easier. Zak Crawley rode his luck but played with increasing authority to make another eyecatching half-century; Ben Duckett and Ollie Pope got out trying to impose themselves on Kuldeep Yadav. Pope has simultaneously had a poor series and played one of England’s greatest overseas knocks.
Updated
WICKET! England 100-2 (Pope st Jurel b Kuldeep 11)
Goodnight. Ollie Pope’s weird series continues when he runs straight past a googly from Kuldeep and is stumped by Dhruv Jurel. I suppose it’s not a great shot on the stroke of lunch, especially as he didn’t pick the googly, but this is the way England play.
Updated
25th over: England 99-1 (Crawley 60, Pope 11) There he goes; there he is goes. Crawley jumps down the track to drive Ashwin for a handsome straight six. He’s scored 22 from his last 10 deliveries against the spinners.
“Ali is right,” says Daniel McDonald, “Roxette really were into cricket:
It must have been glove, so it’s over now /
I had a review, but I lost it somehow/Lay a whisper on my willow/
Leave the winter on the Dharamsala groundI wake up lonely, due to the peripatetic nature of global franchise cricket /
In the change room and all around
Outstanding. I doubt even Stephen Malkmus could get ‘peripatetic’ into his lyrics.
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24th over: England 90-1 (Crawley 52, Pope 10) Crawley laces Kuldeep down the ground for four to reach another half-century, his fourth of the series, from 64 balls. He had a lot of luck against Bumrah in particular but has played some beautiful drives and is looking more comfortable against the spinners.
Right here, right now, Zak Crawley – the man who was ridiculed almost constantly throughout 2021 and 2022 – is England’s best batter. It was just banter though so it’s fine.
“Hello from Dharamsala,” says Tom King. “From almost behind the bowler’s arm at the North end, this pitch looks less quick than previewed and there have been a few that have stopped in the pitch or kept low.
“I think India have certainly been too short, but until Duckett played that unnecessary swipe they were also faced with some pretty obdurate stuff. Crawley especially seems to have come on a lot for someone who claimed he didn’t need to work on a defensive technique. It would be nice to see England bat for a full day...”
Steady on!
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23rd over: England 84-1 (Crawley 47, Pope 9) England take nine from Ashwin’s over. Pope flicked through midwicket for three, then Crawley sliced a drive semi-deliberately over cover for four. They’ve been under pressure all morning and they’re still going at 3.645 per over.
22nd over: England 75-1 (Crawley 42, Pope 5) India’s spinners have started well, with excellent control. Do they ever bowl badly? Crawley relieves the burgeoning pressure by threading a classy drive through extra cover for four. Mr Consistent is into the forties agian.
Crawley is not out! It wasn’t close at all and would have missed on both height and line.
It was a classic delivery from Kuldeep, spinning back in from outside off stump. Crawley pushed forward defensively and was beaten on the inside. I think this is really close, though it might be umpire’s call on leg stump.
Updated
India review for LBW against Crawley! This looks very close. He might be saved by the height.
21st over: England 70-1 (Crawley 38, Pope 4) Three singles from Ashwin’s over. Both England batters are in their danger zone: Pope at the start of the innings, when he is usually very fidgety, and Crawley in unconverted-start territory. They have around 20 minutes to bat until lunch. I was going to say ‘survive’ but they don’t really think like that, do they. In fact, who is today’s designated lunchhawk.
20th over: England 67-1 (Crawley 37, Pope 2) Kuldeep zips one across Pope and past the outside edge. Another delivery keeps a bit low and is pushed into the leg side for a single.
“Interesting observation about the Indian bowling possibly being just a touch too short this morning,” writes Brian Withington. “If that analysis is correct, I wonder to what extent the prior aggression of England’s openers during this series has contributed to the bowlers not risking a slightly fuller length?”
That’s a very good point. I’ll text JB at lunchtime to ask.
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19th over: England 66-1 (Crawley 37, Pope 1) Pope pushes with stiff wrists at his first ball, from Ashwin, which flies just past short leg at catchable height. He’s had the kind of series we may not fully understand for a few years: 1, 196, 23, 23, 39, 3, 0, 0, 1*
18th over: England 64-1 (Crawley 36, Pope 0) That Duckett shot didn’t look great, especially after all that hard work. But I get the impression England feel they have to try to dominate Kuldeep. If he gets into a groove – as he did on the third day of the last two Tests – he can become irresistible.
Updated
Kuldeep Yadav has struck in his first over, and all Duckett’s patience was for nothing. Both batsmen had hit boundaries earlier in Kuldeep’s over, Duckett with a superb back-foot straight drive. He wanted more, though, and sliced the last ball of the over high on the air on the off side. Gill charged back from cover, watched the ball over his shoulder and took an outstanding running catch with both hands.
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WICKET! England 64-1 (Duckett c Gill b Kuldeep 27)
Duckett falls to a terrific running catch from Shubman Gill!
17th over: England 55-0 (Crawley 31, Duckett 23) This is comfortably, by almost 1.5 runs per over I think, the slowest 50+ partnership that Duckett and Crawley have put together. That’s largely because of the conditions and the bowling but I also think it’s another of sign of England’s slight change in approach.
Crawley tries to get things moving by walking down the pitch to Ashwin, but he doesn’t get to the pitch and pads the ball wide of short leg.
16th over: England 53-0 (Crawley 30, Duckett 22) Siraj’s long spell continues; this is his eighth over. The ball isn’t moving as extravagantly now, in the air or off the pitch, although he still finds enough to go past Crawley’s outside edge. Crawley played the line and, unlike Duckett, would tell you it was a leave.
“I think Brendon McCullum is at the decks,” writes our man Ali Martin. “This blend of power ballads and the like is very much in his V.”
Dadrock is dead, long live Bazrock.
15th over: England 51-0 (Crawley 29, Duckett 21) Ravichandran Ashwin, playing his 100th Test, comes on to replace Jasprit Bumrah. His cricket brain will have been whirring ever since the team arrived in Dharamsala, exploring the best way to bowl in these conditions.
Duckett signals his intent with a premeditated scoop for four off the second ball. That’s a brave shot given his struggles against Ashwin, which have extended to this series despite Duckett’s obvious improvement.
14th over: England 47-0 (Crawley 29, Duckett 17) India would love a third seamer this morning. The consensus on the TV coverage, both in the commentary box in Dharamsala and the studio in London, is that India have bowled slightly too short – a “pretty length”.
Siraj continues to hit that length, and then drops one short to beat Crawley’s attempted pull and ping him in the ribs. A maiden. Both batters have faced 42 balls.
“I was born not a million miles from Dharamsala and sources in the area tell me the groundsman asked the Dalai Lama what kind of pitch he wanted,” writes Deepak Puri. “One with grass? One with cracks. ‘Make me one with everything’, he replied.”
Honk!
13th over: England 47-0 (Crawley 29, Duckett 17) Yet another near miss, with Duckett edging Bumrah between third slip and gully for four. He’s beaten twice after that as well. The second was arguably a leave, though Duckett – unlike every other batter alive – will be claiming the play and miss.
If we ever write The Joy of Six: Wicketless Spells, this one from Bumrah will be a strong contender. There are lies, damned lies and bowling figures of 7-1-24-0.
That’s drinks.
12th over: England 43-0 (Crawley 29, Duckett 13) England have been very lucky this morning, though you can argue they have made some of that luck with their relatively low-risk approach. Or would they be 80 for none had they started swinging? I haven’t a clue any more.
“Rob, good morning,” says John Starbuck. “A question for the rain break when it happens: have there been any five-Test series during which every available day saw play in full?”
Cripes, I’ve no idea how you’d research that. Do you mean that every Test went to a fifth day? Or just that they were completed? If it’s the latter, I wonder about West Indies 5-0 England in 1985-86.
Crawley is not out! It’s umpire’s call – on line rather than height - so Crawley survives.
India review for LBW against Crawley!
Crawley softens his hands to ensure an edge fall short of third slip, then thumps another elegant drive between extra cover and mid-off for four. Somehow, and I don’t really know how, he has made it to 29.
That might be where the story ends because India have gone upstairs for LBW. Crawley whipped around a big inswinger and was hit on the pad. Looks highish but India are very confident.
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11th over: England 37-0 (Crawley 24, Duckett 12) Duckett is started to look more assured in defence, which is notable for two reasons: the assurance and the defence. This is the most cautious innings he has played since returning to the Test side, but it makes perfect sense given the quality of the bowling. As if to prove the point, Bumrah ends another high-class over with a beauty that beats Duckett’s defensive push.
“Just had this over the PA,” writes Ali Martin. “Shame they didn’t wait for a bat-pad. It must have been glove, etc.”
10th over: England 35-0 (Crawley 23, Duckett 11) Crawley moves into the twenties with a stately drive to the left of mid-off for four. That’s one of his strengths, the ability to stick to his gameplan even when he’s riding his luck like Willie Shoemaker.
Despite all those false strokes, Crawley has reached double figures for the 14th consecutive innings. These are his Test scores since the start of last summer: 56, 12*, 61, 7, 48, 3, 33, 44, 189, 22, 73, 20, 31, 76, 73, 15, 11, 42, 60, 19*. He might be the first player in Test history to have gone rogue by becoming consistent.
9th over: England 30-0 (Crawley 19, Duckett 10) This is stunning bowling from Bumrah. Crawley mistimes three strokes, all in the air – through point for four, past Bumrah’s right hand and then over mid-off. He gets eigh
Eight runs from the over, which is a bit of a scandal. Bumrah and Crawley break into big smiles, which is quite sweet. Bumrah is a particularly fascinating character. You don’t get many happy-go-lucky geniuses in life, never mind cricket.
“Lovely to see Jonny Bairstow’s mum Janet in that picture as he starts his 100th Test,” writes Rocket. “Sad to remember the tragic passing of Jonny’s dad David, who came here to Australia in the 1978-79 tour. He was a real character - my favourite memory of him from that tour was a one day game at the MCG. He was batting with Mike Brearley I think, and one of them hit a ball to one of the very long square boundaries with no fielders anywhere near it.
“From memory they had run five and Brearley turned for the sixth - David Bairstow had run past the crease for his fifth, then realised Brearley was also coming to his end and so he just kept running to the race at the Members’ Stand - but was able to laugh it off as he did! Janet has done a wonderful job raising Jonny and Andy. She deserves a medal.”
8th over: England 22-0 (Crawley 11, Duckett 10) Duckett cloths Siraj not far short of the man at square leg. Another challenging over ends with Duckett missing a vigorous slap outside off stump. That’s a rare attacking stroke in an unusually restrained partnership. Don’t tell me Bazball is growns up now.
7th over: England 20-0 (Crawley 11, Duckett 8) What the hell was that? Crawley, trying to whip to leg, is beaten by a spectacular delivery from Bumrah that straightens dramatically and bounces over middle stump. It was so brilliant that nobody really knew what had happened. For a second it looked like India might review in the hope Bumrah would be given a wicket for artistic merit.
Crawley edges for four, just wide of the diving slip, then plays and misses again. Bumrah has bowled outrageously well this morning.
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6th over: England 16-0 (Crawley 7, Duckett 8) That’s the first big shot from Duckett, a hearty clump through extra cover for four when Siraj loses his line.
Meanwhile the DJ is having a cracking time, with this the latest offering.
5th over: England 12-0 (Crawley 7, Duckett 4) All the England players, including the next man in Ollie Pope, are sheltering in puffer jackets on the balcony. He could be in sooner than than later because India are bowling marvellously. Duckett plays and misses at another extravagant outswinger, then squints as if to say, ‘The hell do I do with that’.
Duckett flicks an inswinger through midwicket for three, a relatively low-risk shot. The end of the over brings a slightly unnerving blast of Another Day in Paradise from Phil Collins over the tannoy.
“What a venue this is,” writes Brian Withington, surveying his living room with pride. “Let’s hope the cricket lives up to the spectacular views, despite the chilly conditions. Perhaps the (hot) drinks trolley will descend from one of the pavillion towers in a cable car?”
4th over: England 9-0 (Crawley 7, Duckett 1) Duckett pushes an inswinger from Siraj just short of the fielder imaginatively stationed at a very short midwicket. He eventually gets off the mark from his 11th ball, clipping a single off the pad. Siraj ends another excellent over by shaping an outswinger past Crawley’s defensive push.
It’s notable that England haven’t yet tried to put any pressure back on India. I’ll let you decide whether that’s sensible batting or a betrayal of Bazball.
Seven new caps in this India v England series but it's not even the debutiest this year ... 8 in NZ v SA
— Ali Martin (@Cricket_Ali) March 7, 2024
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3rd over: England 8-0 (Crawley 7, Duckett 0) A brilliant second over from Bumrah, who is swinging the new ball prodigiously and beats Duckett twice in three balls. The second was a comedy jaffa, the kind only Bradman might have nicked. Batting looks pretty tough because of the movement in the air.
“What a venue!” says Andrew Crossley. “Evening, Rob (it’s 9pm in Colorado). Travelogue with cricket chucked in feels right as I watch the pictures of the ground’s grandeur. Then I see YJB’s 100-cap presentation, remember it might be the match where Jimmy - always good Jimmy this past dozen years or so - reaches 700, and see Bumrah with a new nut. Cricket a bit more than a sideshow…”
2nd over: England 7-0 (Crawley 7, Duckett 0) Crawley has been England’s best batsmen across the two big series against Australia and India. He’s made 812 runs, almost 200 more than the next best (Ben Duckett with 635), and has become admirably, confusingly consistent.
Crawley times an imperious cover drive for four off Mohammad Siraj, though he’s beaten either side of that stroke. Both deliveries swung dangerously away from the right-hander, which will encourage all four quick bowlers.
1st over: England 3-0 (Crawley 3, Duckett 0) Bumrah goes through his repertoire in the first over. A few wider deliveries to set up the inswinger. Crawley defends that a little awkwardly, ignores an outswinger and then flicks an inswinger for three to get off the mark.
“Been thinking about the dominance of the top three in world cricket,” says Digvijay Yadav. “Obviously it has its own negative ramifications, but the fact that the three play five-Test series against each other and play at such a great intensity is something to behold. Both the Ashes just gone by and this one have been riveting (and a Test here or there could have put them on par with 2005 but not to be).”
They’ve been great fun, and they all play each other again in the next two years. But the bigger picture of Test cricket is – excuse the lack of profundity, it’s 4.05am – in a right state.
Oi! Wake up! It’s almost time for the final act of a terrific series.
Mood music
The pitch looks a cracker - hord and forst, as Tony Greig used to say, so the match should rattle along at a good pace. That said, I’m not sure I’d fancy facing Jasprit Bumrah on a trampoline at altitude.
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This is a landmark match for Ravichandran Ashwin and Jonny Bairstow, who will become the 77th and 78th men to play 100 Tests. We’ll let them decide who should be No77, perhaps with an arm-wrestle.
Bairstow has been taking on the world ever since his painful debut series against Kemar Roach in 2012. At times he has been a Jos-Buttler-bat-handle-slogan on legs. That rage has fuelled many of his greatest performances, including the century against India that probably saved England from World Cup humiliation in 2019.
When Bairstow retires, everyone will have a different memory of his career. It might be the deep purple patch of 2022, the heartbreaking near miss at Lord’s in 2012, the aggressively deadpan gum-chewing after he has pannelled some poor sucker into the crowd. Or it might be what happens in the next five days.
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Team news: Paddikal makes Test debut
Devdutt Paddikal, a young batsman who has scored six centuries and an unbeaten 93 in his last 13 innings, becomes India’s fifth debutant of the series. He replaces the luckless Rajat Patidar, who was injured yesterday evening. Kuldeep Yadav is preferred to Akash Deep.
India Jaiswal, Rohit (c), Gill, Paddikal, Jadeja, Sarfaraz, Jurel (wk), Ashwin, Kuldeep, Bumrah, Siraj.
England Crawley, Duckett, Pope, Root, Bairstow, Stokes (c), Foakes (wk), Hartley, Wood, Bashir, Anderson.
England win the toss and bat
“If you saw a wicket like this in England, you’d probably have a bat,” says Ben Stokes. “But yeah, it’ll be interesting to see what goes on this morning with the overheads.”
Rohit Sharma says “we would have batted for sure”.
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Weatherwatch It’s around 7 degrees – but it’s dry, so play should start on time.
Read Ali Martin’s preview
Shoaib Bashir, who was isolating yesterday due to an upset stomach, is fit to play. Ollie Robinson is still at the team hotel, though, so Marcus Trescothick and Paul Collingwood have been officially registered as substitute fielders. Jimmy Anderson might not be the only fortysomething on the field in this game.
India’s XI hasn’t been confirmed, but Jasprit Bumrah will return to zing the ball through at altitude. Either Akash Deep or Kuldeep Yadav are likely to drop out, though that would be hard on Kuldeep after a brilliant series.
India (probable) Jaiswal, Rohit (c), Gill, Patidar, Jadeja, Sarfaraz, Jurel (wk), Ashwin, Kuldeep/Deep, Bumrah, Siraj.
England Crawley, Duckett, Pope, Root, Bairstow, Stokes (c), Foakes (wk), Hartley, Wood, Bashir, Anderson.
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Preamble
Hello and welcome to live coverage of the fifth and final Test between India and England in Dharamsala. This is a match with a split identity: a dead rubber; a celebration of Jonny Bairstow, Ravichandran Ashwin and Jimmy Anderson; a source of World Test Championship points; a travelogue with a bit of cricket chucked in; and, given the exceedingly chilly conditions, a warm-up for the county season.
One thing it’s not, alas, is a series decider. India’s mighty comeback in Ranchi gave them an unassailable 3-1 lead, and they are strongish favourites to win this game. England’s young bold soldiers probably don’t deserve to lose 4-1, but then nor did India when they toured England in 2018. No team has ever batted so aggressively against India in India, and a win in Dharamsala would make this … not a moral victory, let’s not go there, but maybe a qualified triumph. As Brendon McCullum said in rather different circumstances at Lord’s last summer, 3-2 has a nice ring to it.
It’s bloody hard to win any Test in India; it’s even harder to win a dead rubber. India have only lost one at home in their entire history, against Australia at Bengaluru in 1997-98. They don’t play as many as you might think, just 16 overall, but there has been a pattern to the recent ones: opponents arrive for the final Test beaten and broken, their bodies on the field and their souls in the departure lounge.
It feels like this England side are a bit different, and they have been bright-eyed and bushy-tailed in the build-up. But there’s only one truly reliable window into the soul of a cricket team. It begins at 4am GMT, 9.30am in Dharamsala.
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