Remember how you felt when Game of Thrones ended? Remember that rush of disappointment when you realised that the show you had been obsessively watching for the best part of a decade had thoroughly botched the landing? Remember the baffling character development, rushed plotlines and that altogether too tidy conclusion? Remember when they forgot to remove that plastic water bottle from a shot? Bit of a disaster, wasn’t it.
Now, three years later, HBO are hoping that you’re willing to forget all that unpleasantness, and tune in to their much-ballyhooed GoT prequel series House of the Dragon, which airs on Sunday evening in the US and on Monday in the UK and Australia. Set 200 years before the events of Game of Thrones, it tells the story of a brutal civil war between various members of the Targaryen family as they position themselves to become the rightful heirs of King Viserys (a magnificently bewigged Paddy Considine, above right). There will, naturally, be dragons and platinum blond hair swishing all over the place. For a bit more plot detail than my whistlestop summary, check out Lucy Mangan’s four-star first-look review.
But are you really ready to return to Westeros? I’ve already watched the first handful of episodes of House of the Dragon (don’t worry, I’ll be light on spoilers) and have come up with five questions you should ask yourself before you make that decision. Think of it as a Cosmo quiz, but with (even more) beheadings. Away we go …
1. Just how annoyed were you with how Game of Thrones ended?
If you were incandescent with fury at how GoT went out, you might not be quite ready for House of the Dragon. After all, the two shows are essentially playing in the same sandbox: same house names (Targaryen, Lannister et al); some of the same settings (King’s Landing, looking resplendent and rather less singed than the last time we saw it); the same fantastical CGI beasties flying about overhead; even the same theme tune, albeit one that’s far shorter than the two-minute-odd opus of its predecessor. So yes, if just thinking about those opening blasts of “daaa-daaa-da-da-daa-daa” is already raising your blood pressure, you might want to give this one a swerve.
However, if you were disappointed by GoT’s ending but still hold residual affection for the show’s earlier years, I have good news: HotD is that show – intricately plotted, densely dialogued, displaying a pleasingly ruthless streak. Perhaps my favourite thing about it though is how small it feels compared to those final episodes of GoT. Don’t get me wrong, it’s grand and gorgeously shot and just dripping with HBO budget (there’s a spectacular battle scene in its third episode). But gone are those endless po-faced existential CGI battles for humanity, and instead we’re back to the days of palace intrigue, familial feuding and brutal backstabbing. This is a series that, so far, has more limited ambitions than its predecessor, and is all the better for it.
2. How do you feel about prequels?
At their worst, prequels can feel rather redundant, providing unnecessary buildup to the more interesting story you’ve already watched. In the case of House of the Dragon, we already know of the demise of the Targaryen dynasty further down the ancestral line, so watching this particular mob of blond-haired sociopaths squabble among themselves might seem a little pointless. Equally though, this is a story that Thrones creator George RR Martin has long alluded to in his A Song of Ice and Fire books, and is regarded as quite a major event in the history of Westeros in its own right. So far I’m finding it compelling enough as a standalone tale.
3. How do you feel about Matt Smith?
Ever since Doctor Who, I’ve always found that a little of Matt Smith (above left) goes a long way. An unapologetically big actor, he tends to dominate scenes, sometimes to the detriment of the wider spectacle. He’s terrific here, I think, as Viserys’s brooding, vicious brother and heir apparent Daemon, a role that allows him to scenery-chew with abandon. But the ham-averse might want to steer clear.
4. How strong is your stomach?
At its peak, GoT was almost gleefully bloody (that sound you can hear is me audibly gagging at the thought of Oberyn Martell’s gruesome demise in season four) but as the show raced towards its conclusion it seemed to tone down the overflowing gore somewhat. Early signs from House of the Dragon though are that entrails are very much back on the menu, as are head-smashings, limb removal and – here’s a new one – the sight of soldiers being devoured by crabs. There’s also a scene in the show’s first episode which, while not nearly as operatically violent as those described above, is horribly real and far more upsetting to watch. The squeamish should tread carefully.
5. How much fantasy can you take?
In two weeks’ time, hot on House of the Dragon’s heels, comes Amazon’s Lord of the Rings: The Rings of Power, an even grander spectacle of sorcery and swordplay. But just how much fantasy is too much fantasy? Can anyone juggle two epic shows at the same time without totally losing their grip on reality, and referring to Tesco cashiers as “sire” and “fair maiden”? You might want to make a call on which one you’re going with in advance. Choose wisely, fair traveller (see, I’m doing it already).
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