Don't let the 'Summer Fling Scaries' overshadow the pleasures of PSL and apple-picking season—especially since it's best enjoyed cuddling up to someone special.
Just because autumn is approaching doesn't mean your summer romance has to come to a close. Dating trends like wanderlove and expirationships led us to believe that singles were only in search of something temporary during those warm-weather months, but contrary to popular belief, you don't have to shelf your relationship the way you do your shorts and bikinis.
For those who are not quite ready to part ways with their other, allow eharmony's dating expert, Minaa BLMSW, to help give you the confidence to keep the connection going well into the fall—and beyond.
What are the 'summer fling scaries', exactly?
Similar in premise to the Sunday Scaries, the 'Summer Fling Scaries' deals with our fear of our relationships coming to a close once vacation wraps up. But the good news is that it doesn't have to!
How do you keep your summer fling going strong?
We know you hate to think about the dreaded "defining the relationship" talk, but you're going to have to get a sense of clarity before moving forward. Where does your partner stand? Where do you stand? Talk about it!
"If you cannot even ask someone to define the relationship, what happens when more significant issues arise that you need to discuss," Minaa asked. "Be willing to do the hard work, and if you do not get the clarity you need, it is important to ask yourself if you can continue in the relationship."
In any type of situation, the only way you're going to progress is through honesty. You have to be open when expressing your needs, and if they cannot be met, perhaps you're not spending time with someone who is an appropriate fit. And if the partner you're with cannot respect the fact that you want something permanent, it might be time to find someone with more like-minded values.
"Communication is necessary to help you gain clarity about your relationship and make sure you’re on the same page about the next steps," Minaa added. "It’s also worth remembering that dating is a process and a journey that you can always embark on, so if you find that your partner is not interested in moving forward, don’t shy away from putting yourself back out there."
If you're thinking about pursuing something on a more serious level, make sure to pay attention to your partner's needs and actively listen to what they're looking for. Minaa also suggested showing compassion and appreciation towards your other half, because if you approach the relationship talk from a place of hostility, things won't progress the way you envisioned.
But above all, whatever you're dealing with in the love department, stay true to yourself and listen to your gut (and heart). You can handle whatever comes your way.
