Weddings can be costly, not just for the bride and groom, but for guests too. But it’s worth it to see beloved friends and family finally tying the knot.
But what if the bride is a new friend and you are not particularly bothered about going? Add to the mix the friend being flaky and unreliable and you have a recipe for a disastrous friendship.
That’s the dilemma facing a woman on Mumsnet, who has taken to the forum for advice.
She's looking for reassurance because she has decided, despite accepting her wedding invitation, to decline and not go. What’s the point, she says, as "I hardly know her".
"Am I being unreasonable in pulling out of my friend’s wedding, having RSVP’d several months ago," she asks the forum.
"We’ve only been friends for about 18 months. Really sweet of her to invite dear husband and I to her wedding. It is about an hour away, on a Wednesday, so both of us have booked annual leave. We are also paying for babysitting (£100+)."
But she is beginning to question her decision. "In the last few 3 or 4 months I’ve barely spent any time with her. We don’t socialise with them as a couple at all.
"Yesterday she cancelled plans with me for the second time this month. She has a habit of cancelling on me at the last moment it’s been an ongoing theme."
Her 'friend’s' unreliable behaviour is adding grist to the mill and she has made her mind up:
"I don’t want to go to the wedding anymore. But I don’t know if it’s too late at this point to back out.
"Honestly, I’d be more than happy to spend babysitting money, gift money for a close friend but this just feels silly."
Some comments on the Mumsnet forum advised caution: "I think you’ll lose the friendship if you do so it really depends if that’s ok with you."
While another said: "It will certainly seem a bit 'tit for tat' if you pull out of the wedding immediately after she has cancelled plans but I'd have never agreed to go in the first place."
Another suggested to just go with her gut, arguing: “It's not too late and she's incredibly flaky.
"Cancelling will seem pointed and churlish. If you want to put the final nail in the coffin, do. If not, don't," someone else added.
Another Mumsnet user scathed: "Pulling out now is a really shi**y thing to do."
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