Dating someone from another country (in my case New Zealand), means occasionally stumbling upon pop cultural differences that didn’t quite make the jump across. A few days ago, after it came up in conversation, I sat my girlfriend down and forced her to watch the 2003 Australian Idol Paulini Gold Dress Incident. If you don’t remember this because it was 20 years ago (my bones are turning to dust as I write this), I’ll refresh your memory. Once upon a time back in the days of yore, a 21-year-old contestant named Paulini Curuenavuli was standing in front of the Australian Idol judges, getting feedback after singing the (very difficult) Destiny’s Child song Survivor.
This was pre-streaming, back when millions of people across the country would all sit down as a family (for once!) to watch together. On this particular night, Paulini had the gall to front the judges while wearing a fitted dress.
When it was his turn to speak to her, judge Ian “Dicko” Dickson said the following [imagine an annoying English accent]: “You should choose more appropriate clothes or shed some pounds.” My girlfriend’s mouth dropped open in shock at the comment, but was not surprised when I told her the clip was from 2003. During the pandemic, we rewatched a lot of 2000s teen movies and romcoms and almost every single movie has overt fatphobia in some form. Bring it On has it, Clueless has it, Mean Girls has way more than you remember.
As a Busy Fat Woman who keeps across online trends and movies and is semi-addicted to TikTok, I smell a whiff of 2000s fatphobia in the air. One of the most humongous (pun intended) red flags this past few months has been Brendan Fraser’s comeback, and the success of The Whale. I can say nothing more about the film that has not already been said by Lindy West (and I recommend reading), but I was extremely disappointed to see it win at the Oscars, especially for hair and makeup. Not since The Klumps has a fat suit been used so effectively.
This one film is not the issue, clearly, but the discourse definitely contributed to the atmosphere. There was another undercurrent running below The Whale and the award season this year, and its name is Ozempic, a drug for diabetics that non-diabetic people have started taking for weight loss, causing a shortage for the people who need to take it for their diabetes. Normal!
There are more red flags. At the end of last year, the Kardashians, undeniable trendsetters, have become heavily (pun not intended) focused on getting skinny. Earlier this year saw the trend of “buccal fat” removal, an irreversible procedure that results in angular cheekbones and hollow cheeks. There’s also been a noticeable return of early-2000s aesthetics, midriff-showing tastemakers like Julia Fox, and low-rise waists at fashion shows. Gwyneth Paltrow just got roasted for eating like someone who has had all their teeth removed. There’s also the fact that high-profile fat entertainers like Rebel Wilson, Melissa McCarthy, Adele and Jonah Hill have all lost weight recently. All of these things together feel a bit like a slow-moving avalanche, ready to bury us with a renewed diet culture obsession.
I think sometimes when people hear the word “fatphobia”, they just picture a really fat person getting called out or made fun of for being fat. From my experience, most people don’t give a shit about that. Many, many people do not have empathy for fat people. They do not care that it’s proven by science that fat-shaming does not help anyone lose weight and in fact makes things worse. It doesn’t matter how many ways I’ve tried to explain what it’s like to live in a fat body in this world, doled out facts and figures, pleaded for empathy, described horrible treatment – or even demanded better treatment, been defiant or been confident. Nothing works. If you don’t have basic respect for me because I have a fat body, I cannot convince you to care about me with words. So go back and look at Paulini. She is not fat, yet she suffered the consequences of fatphobia. Is she thin enough for you to care about her feelings? She was humiliated and according to her, her confidence took a blow that set her back years.
When I talk about fatphobia like this, I’m not just talking about overt insults directed at fat people. What I’m talking about is much more insidious than that. It’s teenage girls in movies who are constantly thinking about losing weight, talking about restricting food and demonstrating a fear of being fat. It’s thin girls being called fat by even thinner girls. It’s the media obsessing about Kate Winslet’s allegedly fat body in Titanic. It’s Bridget Jones being considered fat.
It is not just fat people who are destroyed by fatphobia, it is everyone. If you don’t care about the feelings of fat people, I’m here to tell you that you should consider this anyway. Fatphobia causes people with non-fat bodies to perceive themselves as “too fat”. Fatphobia causes everyone to hate their bodies, regardless of size. Fatphobia does not cause thinness, it causes shame. It causes self-hatred. If you are fatphobic vocally, or in your actions, or even thoughtlessly – you are not hurting me, a fat stranger (who is nice!), you are hurting the people around you, even the thin ones you see as worthy of respect. You are handing people the tools to destroy themselves. All because you hate fat bodies for existing? Sorry, but get a grip.
If I sound bitter, it’s because I am. We haven’t made nearly enough progress around fatness and body issues since the 2000s – it feels very two steps forward, one step back. I’m bitter because the way fat people are treated has made many of us hate ourselves. I’m bitter because I know so many non-fat people who also hate themselves, because of how much society hates fat people. I’m tired. I’m over it. I know the kind of response I’ll get to this article. It’s the same every single time I write about this topic. It is relentless fatphobic pushback and it is demoralising.
But I have this collection of red flags and I can see what is on the horizon, so I’m here to send up an emergency Fat Signal (like the Bat Signal, but fat) anyway. We can’t go back to the bad old days. We need to be alert, and alarmed. We need allies. If you’ve never spoken out before against fatphobia, now is the time. We need you to open your skinny mouths.
• Rebecca Shaw is a writer based in Sydney
