Halfback Lachlan Ilias insists St George Illawarra can still depend on him in pressure moments, but concedes he has let the Dragons down at the death to begin the NRL season.
Ilias has been thrown in the deep end after recovering from a long-term leg injury and arriving at the Dragons, who have had two of four games decided by a single point this season.
In both, Ilias's decision-making hurt his side, first in his call not to set up for field goal in a 25-24 loss to South Sydney, then with a fatal error late against Parramatta on Saturday.
With the sides locked at 22-22 in golden point, Ilias spied the chance for a 40/20 kick that could have gifted his side potentially game-winning territory.
Instead, the kick went out on the full, allowing the Eels to stroll into the Dragons' half with a penalty and win their first game of the year through a Zac Lomax field goal.
"If I had my time again down that short side, I'd probably just hoof it and try and trap them in that corner," Ilias told AAP.
"Golden point, it's all about a good kick and a good kick chase, and I just tried to solve it on my own. I'll own that, I'm happy to own that.
"I've been taking a lot of lessons through the first four games, especially the Souths game. I thought I could've managed that game better.
"That's the responsibility of the halves, and I'm more than happy to take that responsibility."
The Dragons have no shortage of game-winners in the side.
Valentine Holmes has kicked 10 field goals across his premiership-winning career, and Clint Gutherson iced a game for Parramatta with a one-pointer back in 2020.
But Ilias says he still thrives in the big moments of games and wants to be the man who stands up with the contest on the line.
"I like to get my hands on the ball in those situations. I don't really like to shy away from those moments," he said.
"I've iced a few games, mainly in the (under) 20s and (NSW) Cup system. I haven't had too many opportunities in NRL, I've hit one field goal.
"You do live for those sorts of close games. I do feel like we're a team that thrives on those situations, we just haven't shown it this year yet."
Coach Shane Flanagan apologised to Ilias for a sardonic jab in a post-match press conference after the Souths loss, but was ardent in his support of the spine following the loss to the Eels.
Former South Sydney half Ilias said Flanagan's trust in him had never wavered.
"Ever since I signed, he's shown belief in me," Ilias said.
"I don't like it when coaches beat around the bush, I like honest feedback. Flanno's the perfect guy to give me that feedback.
"I back the spine, I think everyone backs the spine here to get us over the line. In the close games this year, we just haven't done that, but we're so close to getting ourselves over the line."
