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Daily Mirror
Daily Mirror
National
Saffron Otter

'I ditched excruciating Tinder dates for Saturdays at home and send myself flowers'

A woman who was sick of feeling sorry for herself after 'excruciating' Tinder dates is now embracing her single status and is looking forward to enjoying Valentine's Day alone at home.

Claire Kenny, 47, from Wakefield, says the moment she realised it wasn't a relationship that was missing from her life, everything changed.

The head of communications and blogger started doing things she enjoyed alone and began to look forward to her 'Solo Saturdays' - cooking and watching TV at home. She even decided it was time to send herself bouquets of flowers, complete with messages inside.

Claire then set up an Instagram live series to invite other singletons to join her - and now helps others combat loneliness after it became a hit.

Claire started to enjoy her Saturday nights at home alone (Supplied)

"I gradually identified that what was missing in my life was not necessarily 'relationship-shaped' and got fed up of feeling sorry for myself," Claire told the team at Diamonds Factory UK.

"I decided to do everything I could to embrace my single status and build a life I loved, regardless of whether or not I had a partner."

She started to introduce more hobbies into her weekend and stopped worrying about how to spend her Saturday nights.

"I found myself looking forward to my 'solo Saturdays'," she explained.

"Although for many people it's the big night out, for me it's become my precious time to relax and recharge.

"I cook something lovely, watch what I want on the tv and enjoy my home. Bliss!"

Her new-found happiness inspired Claire to start helping other people who may be struggling to cope with being single, and with over 4K followers on her Instagram - @my40pluslife.me - she decided to utilise her platform.

She'll even send herself flowers (Supplied)

"While happily cooking for myself one Saturday, I had a lightbulb moment: I'd host a #SoloSaturday Instagram live," Claire recalled.

"The premise for this was simple; to provide a friendly, welcoming space for anyone who wants to enjoy a bit of a social connection and a giggle on a Saturday night. And I absolutely love it.

"A wonderfully diverse range of people join me, including those who read my blogs and want to connect with like-minded people.

"The conversation can be extremely random as it's largely driven by what my guests put in the chat, but it's always a lovely mixture of what's topical, and a good laugh.

"I also use this platform to encourage people to be honest about how they are feeling. For me, saying the words 'I'm lonely' out loud was a watershed moment and allowed me to move forward and try to address it.

"I also encourage my guests to find something they enjoy and that allows them to connect with others - many of my guests are involved with the Parkrun".

Claire was blown away by the response from viewers who joined her online, and received heart-warming messages about combatting loneliness and trying new things.

With Valentine's Day just around the corner, Claire is looking forward to celebrating herself and will be hosting a Valentine's special.

Claire is looking forward to celebrating herself this Valentine's (Supplied)

"I'm quite capable of buying myself flowers and do so regularly. I don't know why it took me over 40 years to realise I can do this on 14th February, too," she said.

"In celebration of this epiphany, a few years ago I not only decided to treat myself to a beautiful bouquet, but I also had it delivered to my doorstep and added some beautiful, heart-shaped chocolates and pink fizz.

"This year, I'm hosting a Valentine's special of my usual Instagram Live for anyone who's either experiencing FOMO at home, or is at home by choice, like me."

Claire believes that it shouldn't just be Valentine's Day and special occasions where we can celebrate ourselves and our single lives, and explains how changing her mindset has liberated her from societal pressures.

"Throughout our lives, we are the one constant," she added.

"I used to heavily base my decisions on external guidance, almost seeking permission from someone - or something - separate from me, but I've finally learned that I have everything I need to navigate life's ups and downs, if I just listen to and trust myself.

"I've also found it wonderfully liberating to finally stop worrying so much about what other people think."

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