A Cramlington Navy veteran who was dismissed for being gay when homosexuality was banned in the military has shared how she felt she had to hide her sexuality to keep her job.
Jacqui Swan-De La Maziere was eventually dismissed for being gay, after trying to hide her sexuality since she joined the service aged just 18 in 1989.
She originally joined the Navy to escape poverty in her home city of Liverpool, as she felt as if it was the only option she had.
Jacqui, who now lives in Cramlington with her wife, says she was subjected to awful treatment after word got out that she was gay and she was later left with nothing to show for her service.
Shortly after beginning her new role in telecommunications, she visited several gay clubs in London and realised she was a lesbian, she previously told the Liverpool Echo.
Despite homosexuality being banned in the Navy at the time, Jacqui took the risk and told her colleagues and said “none of them cared” and their attitude was “you are still one of us”. But it wasn’t long before word of her sexuality got out and she was pulled in for an investigation.
"These investigations shamed you for being who you were. These people are trained for wartime interrogation," she said.
The 51-year-old added: "I was interrogated about my sexuality, as I desperately tried to keep it a secret. The fear and distress that I had to endure left such a lasting impression on me. It was so difficult not being able to be myself at this time when I was only a teenager and I was still trying to form my identity.
"I spent months not knowing if I was going to be dismissed or not, and this was such a heavy burden to carry that I admitted who I was and was subsequently dismissed after two years before I even turned 21."
After admitting she was gay, Jacqui was subsequently dismissed after two years of service. She recalled being “dumped in the middle of the night in the North of Scotland” six hours away from her home.
"I lost everything when they just dumped me outside the gates, they basically just made me homeless and I was offered no support. I also lost my Navy family which was such a tough thing to take.
"I was massively affected by the whole ordeal when I was out of the service, I found it difficult to settle and I went all around the country looking for a place, which I was eventually able to find in the North East," she said.
Jacqui has decided to chronicle her experiences in the form of her self-published book 'Maz' with which she aims to tell her story and dispel some of the myths around veterans and the LGBT+ community.
This coincides with the Government's independent review of the treatment of LGBT+ people who served in HM Forces. A conference at Northumbria University in January discussed the impact this treatment had on thousands of people, and Jacqui was inspired by the work done around the subject.
Things are a lot more positive for Jacqui now, as she has found a place among the members of the Newcastle United LGBT+ supporters group, United with Pride.
She said: "I have been living in the North East for four years and I feel very at home here. My wife is a Geordie and everyone has been very welcoming to me.
"I want to say a huge thank you to United with Pride, who have made me feel like one of their own, even though I am not a Newcastle fan myself.
"I left one uniformed group but now I'm part of another one, and this one wears black and white."
The ban on LGBT people serving in the military was only lifted in 2000 and a review has been launched into the impact on veterans who were dismissed for their sexuality or had to hide it.
The Ministry of Defence were contacted for comment.
A Government spokesperson previously told the Liverpool Echo that the “historic treatment of LGBT+ personnel in the Armed Forces was abhorrent” and emphasised that now they are committed to ensuring “every veteran is valued for their service, including those who were affected by the pre-2000 ban”.
The spokesperson added: "We deeply regret LGBT+ members serving in defence suffered injustice as a consequence. Our priority now is to understand the full impact of the historic ban and find appropriate ways to address the wrongs of the past.”
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